What Shall I Name This Love?

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Oct 7

What Shall I Name This Love?... Part 31 (By Taanihalai) (Thanked: 69 times)

Two days passed by since she broke the mirror, Arnav hadn’t spoken a word to her, he was angry for real, all he did was to wake up, get ready go to work and come back late just to sleep.

Khushi skipped going to the office this two days and decided to stay home but Arnav dint question her, it was her company and she was the boss so if she dint want to go it dint make any difference.

Anjali who had gone for a trip with her friends was also back and just like Aakash she was shocked to find out the truth about Arnav and Khushi’s marriage but she was just as understanding as Aakash, she dint ask any questions but just accepted her brother’s decision.

Khushi was sited in her room since morning, she dint step out even after Arnav left for work, she dint know why but she wasn’t liking Arnav’s silence, it was painful the way he behaved like she dint exist, he dint even say a word to her even when they both were alone in this room.

There was a knock at the door and then a few seconds later Anjali walked in with a plate in her hand.

“You haven’t eaten anything since morning so I thought I’ll bring you food here” Anjali said as she sat next to Khushi.

“Thank you Anjali but I really don’t feel like eating, when I feel hungry I’ll go to the kitchen myself and get something to eat” Anjali said.

“So now you’re trying to starve yourself, all the things I said to you dint make a difference did they?” Arnav asked as he walked in.

Anjali stood up as she looked at Arnav in confusion, the way this both two had been behaving since she was back was quite strange, maybe it was just a husband wife fight and she wanted to leave them alone in it so she headed towards the door to leave.

“Leave this with me” Arnav said as he took the plate from her.

Anjali then walked away shutting the door behind while Arnav stared at Khushi then walked towards her and sat next to her.

“Why are you angry with me Arnav” Khushi asked sadly.

“First you try to hurt yourself and then now you starve yourself, what do you expect me to be Khushi? You aren’t a kid, please grow up and now I don’t need any excuses, you’re eating this and finishing it, I’m not going to leave until you finish eating”

Khushi just stared at him blankly, she dint know what to do or what to say, since she came here she had been seeing a totally different side of Arnav, the loving and caring side, he wasn’t like his brother, he cared about people, he was different than what she had thought.

Khushi took a bite of the food as Arnav started feeding her, she took a deep breath and then got hold of his arm, she moved a little closer to him, leaning her head on his shoulder.

“I don’t do it willingly Arnav, it’s just my anger, I dint break the mirror because I wanted to hurt myself, I just got angry and took it out on the mirror… the same thing about me not eating, I dint like you ignoring me like this, you hadn’t talked to me for two days, it felt terrible and I just lost my appetite.

You know Arnav, I wasn’t even a teenager when my mother left me, I was only twelve years old… I loved her so much, she was the only one I had that I could call mine, ofcourse Mr. Singhania was there but then it was like he was never there for us.

He was so busy building a living that he forgot to live, all he wanted was to earn money and be rich, he wanted to achieve everything and I don’t say that’s bad but then in between all that he forgot that we existed in his life.

For days I couldn’t even see my father and that wasn’t because he was out there earning one time food for us, it was because he had earned so much, the only time he had to spend that money was at nights…

He used to go to clubs with his friends and get drunk and flirt around with girls while mom and I stayed home, he would come late nights and I would hear him quarreling with mom in the middle of the night, he even used to hit her and when I asked mom in the morning she would just make some excuse but I knew mom was hurt and I don’t know why she yet chose to stay with him, I was never going to question her even if she left him…

Despite all this, despite seeing how broken my own parent’s marriage was, I still believed in marriages so much, I believed in love still because my mother made me believe it, she taught me that not all men are going to be the same and just because my dad treated her like that, dint mean every other man out there treated his wife like that…

I used to wear her wedding dress and stand in front of the mirror looking at myself and then she would tell me I was going to be the most beautiful bride ever.

I used to blush happily, like each and every girl out there, I also wished for my prince charming… the one I would love, the one who would love me like crazy and the one I’d get married to. That was when I decided I was going to be a designer, because I had a dream of designing my own wedding outfit…

Despite of all the wrong things, my mom always kept me thinking positive, and with time things got worse, my dad started getting drunk every day and then when he’d come back home he’d hit her, what used to happen rarely started happening so often it had shaken me and when my mom realized that she sent me to a boarding school.

I had just started adjusting in the boarding school when the news of her passing away was brought to me, I was completely shattered Arnav.

For once I had even forgotten what my father looked like, and when I heard that my mother was no more, I was totally broken, I wondered where I would go, who I would talk to and everything else.

I went back home and met him, he was sited next to my mother’s body and I dint like it because he wasn’t the same man I used to know a few years back… There was a time when he used to love my mother Arnav, there was a time he used to spend time with us and then he changed suddenly, as he started earning well, he started changing too.

That day when I saw my mother lying there lifeless, I broke, not because I had just lost my mother, but because I realized I had lost my father too, in fact I had lost him long back, I just hadn’t realized it.

I’ve been telling him about this every time, whenever he asks me why I don’t call him dad, I tell him that I lost my father the day I lost my mother because that’s when I realized, I had no one to call mine anymore.

After mom passed away, things got even worse, although he brought me back from boarding school, he left me behind with a few servants who did everything for me while he dint even come home to check on me for weeks.

I don’t say that my father was bad Arnav, I remember him being good, I remember him being my father but then I don’t know why things changed and he stopped being my father.

I grew up all alone without my father, I used to bring my school friends home often so that I wouldn’t feel lonely at home but you see Arnav I was strong, I dint give up… I still waited and hoped that one day I would meet my prince charming like my mother always told me, I knew he was going to love me so much and then maybe I’d get married to him and he would take me home and maybe then I’d stop being this lonely.

I dint have to wait much because then I met Aakash…”

A tear dropped from her eyes on his shoulder and Arnav looked at her, all this while he was so lost listening to her it felt like all this was happening in real.

“Your brother made me realize that fairytales dint exist, prince charming dint exist, this thing called life was a total mess and it was worse than hell.

That night he left me alone when I needed him the most Arnav, he left me alone there, how could he? If today I am like this, it’s only because of all the men in my life, they all pushed me into darkness, no one ever tried to pull me into the light.

That night… I lost everything… I lost myself… that night…” She couldn’t continue anymore… she was sobbing terribly.

Arnav got hold of her and hugged her as tight as he could, he knew she was opening up to him, and the much she had told him was hard but maybe what she wanted to tell him after that was more difficult.




Oct 7

What Shall I Name This Love?... Part 32 (By Taanihalai) (Thanked: 62 times)

“What happened that night Khushi?” Arnav asked

Khushi broke the hug as she moved away from him looking at him with fear, terrible thoughts ran in her mind.

“When you get answers for my question, I’ll give you an answer for your question, that’s the deal we had right?” Khushi said as she stood up wiping away her tears.

“Don’t you trust me Khushi?” Arnav asked

“Honestly speaking Arnav, I trusted no one at all but I feel like I have started trusting you and that’s why I told you everything about my dad, but I can’t tell you more”

“Why can’t you tell me if you trust me Khushi, you know keeping it to yourself is killing you from inside, talk it out, share it with me, it will help”

“I can’t tell you because I am scared Arnav, what if you judge me? What if you leave me? What if you start looking at me differently?”

“You know that won’t happen Khushi” Arnav said as he got hold of her and looked her into the eyes.

“You don’t know what you are saying Arnav, anyway I am glad you listened to me and the day I find enough courage to tell you what happened that night I will, but as for now I am sorry, I don’t think I have the answers to your questions” Khushi said

“Khushi please” Arnav begged as he went down on his knees in front of her, folding both his hands.

“I am tired of feeling this way, I am tired of seeing you so hurt and not knowing why you are hurt, I am tired of not being able to do anything to make you feel better and it’s hurting me terribly.

You want the answer to your question and believe me I want it to, I want to know why I care so much about you, why everything about you feels so much connected to me, why when you cry I feel the pain in my heart.

I don’t know why I am feeling this way and I really wish I had an answer to it, if you know it please give me the answer, all I know is that you’ve become so special for me, I don’t want anything to ever hurt you, I want to keep you happy and safe always and I can’t do that before I wipe away the memories of your past that haunt you so badly.

Please do me this favor and talk to me, because seeing you like this is now killing me, I promise I will do all I can to get you out of this, I promise I’ll do everything to make you feel better”

“Don’t make it hard for me Arnav, we anyway had a deal that I’ll stay here for a month, a week had almost passed by, I have three week and then I’ll go back home and you’ll not have to see me like this, maybe then you’ll be okay.” Khushi said as she turned away from him while tears rolled down her eyes.

Arnav stood up and stared at her back for a while, how could she talk of leaving even after all this? But they had a deal and now he felt like he dint want to let her go, why was he feeling like this?

He turned around and walked away feeling completely helpless. He just wished he had the answers to Khushi’s questions then maybe she could tell him about what had happened and maybe he would have convinced her to stay here with him even though his house was nothing compare to her father’s mansion.

He was now determined to find the answer she wanted, he wanted to know why he felt this way towards her and more than that he wanted to know about her past.

 

Arnav knocked at the door of Aakash’s room and waited for him to open the door, right now he needed someone to talk to and he had no one else apart from Aakash and NK, and NK wasn’t here right now.

“Arnav, what happened?” Aakash asked as he opened the door.

“If you aren’t busy, can we sit and talk?” Arnav asked.

“Sure, come inside… what happened? You look worried. Is everything between you and Khushi okay? Is she okay?” Aakash asked

“Yeah everything is fine, I just felt like I needed to talk to you, it’s been long since we sat like this and talked, I was missing it” Arnav said

“Yeah you are right, since NK left for his studies, we haven’t had time to sit together” Aakash smiled.

“Aakash, I was wondering… I mean when you met Khushi, how did you feel about her? I mean what made you realize that you were in love with her? And you wanted to spend the rest of your life with her?”

“Why this question all of a sudden?”

“Nothing, I was just asking for knowledge, I mean we dint have anything to discuss so I thought we’d discuss this”

“Why don’t you accept it that you feel like you are falling for her and so you want to be sure” Aakash smiled.

“There’s nothing like that” Arnav said trying to hide is smile.

“I don’t know Arnav, I don’t know if what I felt for her was love or just an infatuation, because I believe that if I really did love her, I wouldn’t have let all that happen to her. But if you really want to know if you are in love with her or not, I believe there is nothing that can answer that except your feelings. I mean how do you feel when you are with her, how does it feel when she isn’t around, do you yearn to be with her?

Do you look for excuse to spend time with her? Does her smile make you smile? Does her laughter give you butterflies? Does her pain make you feel sad, do her tears make you feel like you want to fight the whole world just so see her happy again?

If you feel all this towards her and most importantly, if you respect her and trust her, and you want to save her from everything that could destroy her then you have your answer, you are in love with her, there’s no other word to describe those unknown feelings than love.”

“Oh okay” Arnav said as he got lost in thoughts.

“Now that you’ve got you answer, do you mind if I sleep?” Aakash asked

“No, I’ll see you tomorrow morning” Arnav said as he stood up and headed towards her door.

“Arnav” Aakash called out suddenly as Arnav stopped where he was and turned around to look at him.

“Yes bro”

“Go tell her, I don’t know how she will react but she deserves to know that there’s someone who loves her more than she can imagine, she deserves to know that not all men are like me and Shrey, there are some like you too who genuinely care for her”

Arnav nodded as he walked out of the room shutting the door behind. This was it? This is why he had been feeling all this strange feelings towards her? It was all because he was in love with her?

He wanted to rush back to the room and tell her how he felt, give her the answer she wanted, tell her he cared because he loved her but he dint want to tell it to her like this… she had seen a lot of nightmares, he now wanted to show her the fairytale and for that he knew what to do.

He wanted to show her a life where he loved her, where she was going to be happy, where if she ever needed anyone he would always be around her.

He wanted to make her forget all her past pain for once and just see how beautiful life was, and then he would tell her about his feelings.

He knocked at the door of his room and then walked inside, Khushi was sited on the bed lost in her own world.

“I’m going to the office, I have some urgent work and I have to finish it overnight, I’ll see you tomorrow morning okay? If you need me, you can always call me” Arnav said

“What work is it? How come I have no idea about it?” Khushi asked

“There is something, you haven’t been coming to the office lately anyway, so you don’t know about it”

“Okay” Khushi said as Arnav smiled and walked away.

He knew what exactly he had to do, and he was excited about it, he just hoped everything would go as planned.




Oct 10

What Shall I Name This Love?... Part 33 (By Taanihalai) (Thanked: 66 times)

Khushi woke up next morning and found a packet placed next to her, she looked around wondering who must have left it here.

“Arnav, is this packet yours?” she asked as she called out for him but there was no reply.

She remembered he told her that he had left for some work, did he even return or not yet? She stood up and looked around the whole place but she dint find him so she headed back to her room and picked up the packet.

She found her name written on it, thinking maybe it was a parcel from someone and maybe Anjali might have received it, she opened it up.

She pulled out a beautiful white skater dress which was of mid-calf length all decorated with different patterns, she walked towards the mirror and held it closer to herself looking at the beautiful dress.

“Amazing” she said as he turned it around to look at the back when a piece of paper fell from it.

She picked it up and had a look at it, it was a note left for her.

“Be ready by ten, I’ll pick you up, I have something planned for you, don’t call me to question me, I’m not telling you anything so just do as I say.

I want you to dress up the best you can and I really hope you like the dress, it kept me awake overnight.

Arnav.

A smile curved up on her face as she put the note aside and looked at the dress again, so he lied to her about work when all he wanted to do was design a dress for her overnight, that too such a beautiful dress which she couldn’t stop admiring.

She blushed on her own wondering what he had planned for her, it was the first time someone had made so much effort for her, to make her happy, she felt really good, it was as if all the pain she’d been holding on to had started disappearing slowly, she always thought no one cared about her but things were changing, she knew Arnav did care for her and that made her happy.

She headed to take a shower, she wanted to be ready by the time Arnav had told her to and she wanted to look her best today and do everything like he had told her, get dressed in the beautiful dress he’s sent for her accompanied with heels and a bit of makeup.

 

At sharp ten o’clock Khushi stepped out of the house and found Arnav waiting for her there on his bike, he couldn’t stop staring at her, she looked extremely gorgeous, she had worn the dress he had designed for her with red heels, her hair was all curled up and she wore minimum make up with a red lipstick and in her hand she held a white matching clutch.

She walked towards him and Arnav couldn’t just take his eyes away from her, he felt like he was going to lack words to complement her beauty.

“You look gorgeous Khushi, now I feel bad I have to take you in a motorbike, I wish I had a car, it would have been much better” Arnav said.

“I don’t mind a motor bike either” Khushi smiled as she sat behind him adjusting her dress.

“Hold me tight then, we are in for a tough ride, and just for safety please put on this helmet, it will also save your hair from getting spoilt in the wind” He said as he handed her a helmet.

Khushi smiled as she took it from him and put it on while they both drove away.

 

Arnav parked the car outside a garden which seemed to be completely empty, there were only a few people around.

Both of them stepped down as Khushi looked around wondering why he must have brought her here, what was it that he had planned? Her curiosity kept in increasing as each and every minute passed by.

“Actually this garden is usually empty, I wonder why people don’t like visiting when it’s such a beautiful place, so anyway, I hope you’ll like it, this is all I could manage” Arnav said as he got hold of her hand and pulled her with him.

Khushi kept on staring at him as she felt a sudden rush of adrenaline all over her body the moment he got hold of her hand, she kept on staring at him as he pulled her to wherever he wanted to take her, she couldn’t describe what she felt in that one moment, but it was like she had started believing in fairytales and prince charming once again.

She couldn’t forget how harsh she had been to him, she even forced him to marry her and yet he was here doing all this for her, how could he be so sweet, so good hearted? How was he different from all the men she had ever known?

Khushi looked away from him when they stopped and looked around, she found herself standing in between the garden, there were colorful flowers planted all over and in the middle of it was a round table with two chairs placed.

“Arnav, we are here to have lunch? Or breakfast? I mean the time is in between” She giggled

“Just something like that, take it as a brunch, I have brought this with me, specially cooked by me only for you” He said as he showed her a picnic bag he was holding in his hand.

“What’s so special today? You’re doing so much for me, and I’m loving this, this place is so beautiful and this dress is extra beautiful, thank you for it Arnav, but you really dint have to stay up whole night making it for me” Khushi said

“I’d do anything to see that smile on your face Khushi, this is nothing, now come on, let’s sit” He said as he pulled her towards the table, he left her hand and pulled out a chair for her, she sat down and then he sat opposite her as he started unpacking all the food he’d brought along.

“Some day when I become rich, I’ll take you to a five start hotel and get the whole place boked and decorated beautifully for you but for now, you can manage with nature’s beauty and home cooked food from me” he said as he placed everything on the table.

“This would still mean much more that that because you have put a lot of effort in this” Khushi smiled

Arnav put a plate in front of her and one for himself as he opened up all the tins, Khushi looked at it excitedly, he had made cheese pasta for her, there were some slices of pizza and her most favorite Pani puri.

“Oh My God! How do you know I love all this?” Khushi asked

“I just did some research so I dint want to bring you food to match the time or the brunch thing, I just wanted to make something you love” Arnav said as he started serving her.

They both sat there staring at each other while they finished their brunch and then he opened up another tin which had her favorite red velvet cake.

“When did you get time to do all his?” Khushi asked in surprise.

“I did, and Anjali helped me a bit, I couldn’t manage it all alone obviously” Arnav smiled

“Thank you so much, all this means really a lot Arnav” She said as she took a bite of the cake.

“It’s really yummy, I love it… but Arnav why all this so suddenly? I still don’t understand”

“Khushi I wanted to give you your answer, remember you had asked me why I cared for you, why I felt hurt when you were hurt. Why everything about you mattered to me? I know the answer now and that’s why I brought you here, far away from everything, just you and me to tell you that…”

“Continue Arnav, finish your sentence I’m listening” Khushi said as she took another bite.

“Khushi I care for you really a lot, I’d always want to see you happy and it would always hurt me if you are in pain because I love you”

“What?” Khushi said as she stood up suddenly.

Arnav stood up and he walked towards her, he cupped her face and looked her into the eyes.

“Yes Khushi, I love you, I love you so much, I just realized it last night and I dint want to waste time, I wanted to tell you how I felt towards you and that’s why I did all this, that’s why I brought you here to tell you how much I love you.

I don’t know how it happened or when it happened, I just know that my feelings for you kept on growing with every moment I spent with you and now I know what they are, I know what I feel for you is nothing else but love, only love” Arnav said in one breath as he looked at her nervously yet with a smile on his face.

Khushi pushed him away suddenly as the smile on her face vanished while her eyes were filled with tears, she couldn’t believe what she had just heard, she couldn’t believe that he was in love with her, how could he? It wasn’t possible.

“No Arnav No!” She shouted as she turned away from him and fell down on her knees breaking down completely.




Oct 11

What Shall I Name This Love?... Part 34 (By Taanihalai) (Thanked: 80 times)

“Khushi!” Arnav said as he looked at her in shock, as much as he had known her he believed she felt for him but her reaction was something complexly different to what he had thought.

He rushed towards her and bent down in front of her as they both looked at each other eye to eye, Khushi couldn’t stop crying while Arnav felt so bad for making her cry, his only intention was to tell her how much he loved her and what she meant to him that’s it, he never wanted to see her breaking down like this.

He got hold of her and pulled her into his arms hugging her tight, he just wanted to do everything he could so that she could stop crying.

“It’s okay if you don’t feel the same for me Khushi, I wouldn’t force you for anything but please don’t cry, I just wanted you to know what I feel towards you and that’s why I told you about it, my intention was never to hurt you”

“It’s not about me feeling for you or not Arnav, it’s about everything, all this is wrong, it shouldn’t have been like this!”

“Why is it wrong Khushi? Do you want to tell me that I shouldn’t have loved you? So it’s like saying in short loving you was wrong?”

“Yes! It was wrong, and when you get to know the truth you’ll realize how wrong you were… Arnav you can’t love a girl like me, I don’t deserve to be loved… or whatever it is, I just want you to know that you and me, it’s never ever going to be possible”

“But why can’t it be possible Khushi, tell me you don’t feel even a bit for me then I’ll understand but if you want to give me all the other reasons in the world then just so you know, they aren’t going to make any difference to me.

I love you so much Khushi and you are really important for me, I want you to know that and just because you think I’ll ever feel wrong about loving you then that’s not the truth Khushi”

“Arnav please don’t say that, don’t make me weak… Khushi Singhania has kept herself strong for years now, please don’t ruin all the strength I had gathered, please don’t ruin it for me Arnav, I’ll never be able to stand up strong again…

It was very tough in the past but if the same thing happens again, I won’t be able to take it so please just leave me alone, I guess I should go back home, the decision of getting married to you was wrong, I was stupid, I knew I should never have got married but then Shrey came and spoilt everything…

I am so sorry, it’s all my fault, if I dint come to stay with you then maybe you wouldn’t have ever felt that way towards me, I am really very sorry Arnav but this is it, I’ll make sure this ends here, I’ll go back home and everything will be okay…”

“Nothing is going to be okay Khushi, you know it”

“It will be, you’ll have to forget me and move on, I am sorry I spoilt your life but I’m sure you’ll get a girl who will love you as much as you will love her and she would keep you happy and you’ll forget me”

“And what about you Khushi? Will you stop loving me? Why should I go on looking for another girl to love me when you already do?”

“When did I say I loved you?”

“But you dint say you dint love me either so what am I supposed to make out of it? You know what, if you really want me to stop loving you and to forget about you, you’ll have to stop loving me first, tell me Khushi, will you be able to do it?”

“Arnav why don’t you understand? I am trying as much as I can to keep myself strong right now because I don’t want to be the Khushi I was before, I don’t want to break, so please just listen to me once, just know that you and I can never be together, You are like a bright sunny day and I am like the dark night, I would ruing everything”

“But what’s wrong in giving me a chance Khushi? Tell me why you can’t do it, if not for yourself then for me? What is it that you fear so much? Why do you feel like I’m going to stop loving you or say it was wrong loving you?”

“I wish I could explain it, just know that I’ve tried everything before and I’ve seen the outcome of it, I don’t want to give out chances anymore, I don’t want to hurt myself again and again”

“I would never hurt you Khushi”

“I Know Arnav, but it’s going to be out of your control so the best thing is to end it here, I’ll never see you again and I don’t want you to look around for me or try seeing me” Khushi said as she stood up and started walking away leaving Arnav all alone behind there.

“You still dint say you dint love me and unless you say it I’m not going to stop trying Khushi” Arnav shouted from behind.

“If that’s all you want, all the best then” Khushi said as she walked away without turning to look at him for one last time which broke his heart a little more.

 

“Oh, look who’s here finally” Mr. Singhania stood up from the sofa and placed the newspaper aside as he saw Khushi walking in.

Khushi made sure to ignore him as she headed to climb the stairs so she could go to her room and get some time alone, whatever Arnav had just told her, had shaken her a lot and after that she dint want to face her father at all because she knew he had lots of things to taunt her about.

“Wait Khushi, why is the servant bringing in your luggage? Don’t tell me you left Arnav’s house! What happened, dint you both love each other so much? So why have you come back in just a few weeks?” Mr. Singhania asked

“I am in no moods to talk to you right now, we’ll talk later”

“No, we’ll talk right now! You left Shrey for him and now I can see he couldn’t even keep you happy… how did you forget you have got used to all this luxury and without it you weren’t ever going to be happy and that good for nothing Arnav couldn’t even provide you with like 5 percent of what you used to get here”

“That’s it, not even a word against him” Khushi said as she turned to look at her father angrily.

She descended the stairs and walked towards him standing face to face with him looking at him with her eyes burning red with rage.

“You won’t say anything about him, not even a word, he’s my husband and whatever the issue might be in between us, you don’t have the right to say anything at all…

How would you even understand love when all you’ve ever know is money, no let me rephrase it, a man who forgot my mother’s love for money can never understand love”

“Talk to me with respect Khushi, I am your father”

“How many times have we had this discussion Mr. Singhania? My Father died with my mother, you aren’t my father, you dint do anything my father would have done for me and about respect, it’s not given, it’s earned and you never earned my respect for yourself”

“You know what? Let’s end it here, tell me why so much of bitterness for me, why so much hatred for me? What have I don’t to you that you always behave in such a manner towards me?”

“You have done everything for me to hate you, you were never there for me after mom passed away, don’t you think I never noticed how you used to hit mom? Or you just thought I was a kid and I dint understand things?

You are one of the main reason why I think all the men out there are douchebags even when some of them aren’t, men like you who hit their wives to get out their frustration, or men like Shrey who kiss their own friend forcefully even after I refused a hundred times, or men like Aakash who don’t stand up for the girl they love, or worst of all men like Ajay, the guy whom you thought was perfect to be your daughter’s husband an year ago but he just left and did you ever ask him or me why he refused to get married to me?

No! You dint because you dint care anyway, you just wanted to get rid of me because I was a burden to you and you must have thought that Ajay would also have thought I was going to be a burden on him right?

You know what Mr. Singhania? I’m so done of dealing with all this alone, I’m so done of thinking I was wrong all this while and I just kept quiet for the sake of God knows what but now you should know the truth, you should know why I hate you so much so you stop asking me the same question every now and then.

You know why I hate you so much Mr. Singhania? Because your own daughter, I Khushi Singhania was raped some years back and you being my damn father have no idea about it, do you know why? Because you never bothered to ask, you never saw my tears, you never cared when I lost weight because I couldn’t eat when those terrible thoughts kept on disturbing me, you never treated me like a daughter.” Khushi shouted at the top of her voice.

“Khushi!” She heard Arnav’s voice from the entrance and turned to look at him in complete shock, she wasn’t expecting to see him here and now he was here, and he had heard what she had just said, but how was he going to react about it?

She felt so terrible, so nervous, so vulnerable….


Oct 12

What Shall I Name This Love?... Part 35 (By Taanihalai) (Thanked: 74 times)

Arnav stood there staring at her in shock, he had always known there was something terrible that had happened to her but she never knew it was this terrible, he always thought he would be able to help her heal her wounds but this wounds were so hard to heal.

“You weren’t supposed to be here Arnav, you weren’t supposed to know this, please don’t come here, you should leave, please go away Arnav” Khushi said as Arnav started walking towards her.

He stood in front of her and cupped her face looking into her eyes which was full of so much pain, she stood in front of trembling nervously and feeling all scared wondering what he was going to think about her now, how he was going to react about it, so many terrible thoughts crossed her mind but she tried her best to brush them off, Arnav wiped away her tears and held her tight into his arms.

“I am sorry Khushi, I really am very sorry… I should have understood it, I should have tried all I could to make you tell me this earlier” Arnav said as he held her so tight.

Khushi hugged him back tighter and she broke down into tears completely, since the incident she had been all alone keeping this secret hidden with herself all this while but now she wanted to feel free of it, she wanted to cry out until all those terrible memories were washed out of her mind.

“It’s not your fault Arnav please don’t be sorry, the ones who should have understood or should have been sorry aren’t sorry at all” Khushi said as she broke the hug and looked at Mr. Singhania who was standing still.

“Why dint you ever tell me about it?” He asked

“Did you ever bother to ask? When did you ever have time for me? You were always busy with your work you never had even five minutes out of your busy schedule to ask your daughter how she was doing”

“I am sorry Khushi, I dint know”

“Your sorry isn’t going to change a thing, it won’t change the fact that I had to make myself strong after that incident when you should have been the one to help me be strong, to advise me that everything was going to be okay, you should have been there to wipe my tears away but you never noticed them, not even when I was sited right here in front of you crying, if you think I’ll forgive you then you are wrong Mr. Singhania, I would never ever forgive you.” Khushi said as she took a few steps backward.

“I am thankful for your concern Arnav, but I need to be alone now so please so if you don’t mind, can you leave?”

“Of course I mind Khushi, do you think I’m going to let you run in your room and lock yourself inside with all those terrible memories once again? No!

I am here for you, and I am not going anywhere without you, you are my wife and I’m here to take my wife back home so please get back your things, we need to go home”

“Arnav, I can’t come” Khushi said as more and more tears kept rolling down her eyes.

“Why? What’s the problem Khushi? Look I know you love me too then why are you keeping yourself away from me, please give me one chance to show you my love, I promise you won’t ever regret the decision, I would never hurt you like any of those men you ever met, I’ll prove it to you that I am different than them all and my love for you is eternal”

“Arnav are you acting deaf or dint you just hear what I said a while back? I was raped if you want to hear it again, and I don’t deserve to be with you, people would ruin your life because of me, I am not the one for you, I am no more pure like they say” Khushi

“You are pure than the water of the Ganges Khushi and I wouldn’t hear otherwise, I don’t care what the world thinks as long as I know what you are and who you are, for me what matter is your love and nothing else Khushi”

Khushi dint say a word, she walked back towards Mr. Singhania and looked him into the eyes.

“You see how wrongly you judge people Mr. Singhania? There was this man Ajay you wanted me to get married to but when I told him the truth he ran away talking about his family’s respect and that he couldn’t marry a girl who wasn’t pure… he made me hate myself so much… and then here’s Arnav, the man you’ve always disliked because he was poor but you know what Mr. Singhania, he’s rich by heart and he’s here all ready to accept me”

Khushi turned to look at Arnav as she got hold of his hand.

“I am really glad you love me so much Arnav and despite of knowing the truth you want to be with me but I am sorry, I don’t have the strength to do this to you, I don’t know if I’ll ever be strong enough to do all in this relationship, I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to give you the love you deserve.

Yes you were right, I do love you, so much and just like you I dint realize when it happened, I don’t know if it was at the office when you started working or when I came to live with you and you cared for me more than anything else… I just know that right now, I am so much in love with you but like I said, you deserve better Arnav and I am not even good”

“Don’t say that Khushi, you are and you’ll always be the best one for me, you even said you loved me then why can’t we be together?”

“Because no matter how beautiful this sounds right now, a few months later when the society starts taunting you about your so called raped wife, it wouldn’t be beautiful anymore.

There was a reason why I told you I never wanted to get married Arnav and this was the reason, I am sorry but I can’t give you what you want”

“I don’t care Khushi! I don’t give a damn about the society and you know that, I don’t care what they say, all I want is you to be in my life, I want you to feel loved once again, I want to love you and to prove it to you please give me the chance”

“You surely don’t want it Arnav, believe me… let’s not argue about this, please leave” Khushi said as she rushed upstairs but Arnav wasn’t going to give up, he ran behind her, he wanted to do everything he could to take her back with him.

“I told you to go away Arnav” Khushi said

“I am not going anywhere without you Khushi, we both love each other so much then why do you want to punish me like this?”

“This punishment is better than what you’ll have to face if you’ll be with me”

“Khushi please, I love you, isn’t that enough for us?” Arnav said as he got hold of her hand.

“I wish it was Arnav, close your eyes and think, I’ll come back with you, we’ll go home, back to our room, you’ll shut the doors and I’ll be scared, you’ll try to touch me or to kiss me and it would scare me, it would remind me of all those terrible things… everything that should be beautiful would end up being a part of my worst memories, do you think you’ll be able to live with that?

Will you be able to live with the thought of your wife being scared of your touch? You can kiss her because it scares her, you can’t do anything because it will remind her she was raped.

You will try to understand it in the beginning and be okay with it but as time goes on, you’ll get fed up and irritated of it and I don’t want that for you Arnav, I don’t” Khushi said as she broke down once again.

“What if I would touch you and you wouldn’t feel scared or you wouldn’t be reminded of it?” Arnav asked

“You know that’s not possible Arnav”

“It is Khushi, because you know I am not that man, I love you and I’d make love to you because you would want it, yes in the beginning it would remind you of all the terrible things but I promise as time goes on, it will erase all those memories away from your mind, it will make you confident about it”

“I wish Arnav, but I know myself better”

“And I know you more than that Khushi”




Oct 13

What Shall I Name This Love?... Part 36 (By Taanihalai) (Thanked: 72 times)

Khushi was short of words, she dint know how to explain her problem to Arnav, she dint know how she was going to make him understand that for both of them to be together, it was going to be something next to impossible.

She ran to her room and shut the door while Arnav stood their knocking at the door trying to convince her with everything he could.

“Khushi please talk to me, if you think running away from me like this is going to help you then you are wrong”

“Then let me be wrong Arnav, but I am sorry I can’t do this”

“If you are stubborn, I also am, I’m not leaving this place without you and I don’t care how much it takes to convince you that for me all that matters is love, that’s it”

“What kind of love Arnav, you can’t love a girl who was raped, what will you name that love? Pity for a girl like me?”

“The relation we share doesn’t need a name Khushi and unless you’ve forgotten you are my wife, that’s the name for our love, we are husband and wife, and I’m here to take my wife home and I’m not going back without her, that’s it” Arnav said as he walked back downstairs while Khushi jumped on her bed and hugged her pillow tight not able to decide what to do and what not to do.

Mr. Singhania was still standing where they had left him, he was like in a deep shock, he hadn’t moved even an inch.

“I am sorry Arnav, I dint know” Mr. Singhania said as he saw Arnav.

“Then you should have known, how did you expect her to come to you and tell you such a big thing on her own when you couldn’t even bother to ask?”

“I know it’s all my fault, I was the one at fault always but I am really very sorry, please forgive me”

“Who am I to forgive you sir, I’m just hurt knowing Khushi had no one by her side at the worst moment of her life, not even her father…

Do you know what it would have been like for a girl like her? going through all that all alone, crying in front of your own father but your tears still goes unnoticed, I am no one to forgive you and if it’s upon Khushi, as the man who loves her and as her husband I wouldn’t ever want her to forgive you” Arnav said bitterly.

“I am a human being, I made a mistake”

“If it was once I could understand but you made the same mistake every now and then, what you did to her mother and then what you did to her, you know I feel like instead of having a father like you, it’s better not to have a father at all.

Today if she’s this much hurt and broken it’s all because of you, just think for once Mr. Singhania what would have happened if you had asked her just once about it, and she would have told you… Imagine what difference it would have made if you had stood up for your own daughter when that stupid guys whoever he was walked away saying he couldn’t marry her because she was…

You know what I feel disgusted, if today Khushi thinks all men are the same it’s not her fault, because you could have proven that wrong, no matter what Shrey did or Aakash or that Ajay did.. Or even the person who did this to her, if you could have understood her, today she wouldn’t think like that.

Shame on you and shame on all those men, I know one of them was my brother but shame on him too because none of you were able to respect her or at least love her as much as she deserved, it’ until time she decided to talk to me, and I promise you once I find out who did this to her, I’ll punish everyone for what they did to her” Arnav said as she stormed out angrily.

He had a lot to say, he had a lot to complain about but he just tried to keep his temper down and as he walked towards the bench in the garden of Singhania mansion, he wondered how Khushi would have bared with all this for so long, how she managed to keep quiet and keep it all to herself when she could have shouted at everyone who ruined her life.

He wondered if he was feeling this way, she must have felt worse and he somehow felt proud of her, people usually said men were strong, but women like Khushi were stronger, even emotionally.

 

Arnav sat outside the mansion for the whole day, he was going to make sure he dint leave without Khushi and no matter how stubborn she was going to be, he was going to do all he could to convince her.

The night was turning darker and the weather colder, Arnav sat still on the bench, Mr. Singhania hadn’t left the mansion at all neither had Khushi walked out of her room.

He kept on staring at the window of her room, her room had been dark since evening, she hadn’t even switched on the light.

A few moments later, he saw the light flickering on and then the window to her room was opened as she peeped outside and her eyes fell on Arnav directly.

Kyun khwabon pe tere saaye hai, dil kyun hai tanha mera…

Kyu khamoshi hai zubaan meri, ashkon se keh paun na…

Kyu dard hai itna tere ishq mein.. rabba ve.. rabba ve..

She stared at him as he stared back at her, tears rolled down her eyes as she shut the window quickly and fell down on her knees breaking down completely.

She couldn’t understand why Arnav was being so stubborn, why he dint want to let this just end here and cause himself and her less pain than was it was right now.

Kyun nazrein teri yun anjaan hai… ankhein hai meri bhi nam…

Kyun paa kar bhi tumko khoya hai… hum kyun na banpaye hum…

Kyun dard hai itna tere ishq mein… rabba ve.. rabba ve..

She stood up trying to control her tears but they just couldn’t, her heart was breaking, she wasn’t liking any of this at all, she couldn’t understand why Arnav was being so stubborn, why there was so much pain in everything.

She opened the window and found him staring right at her, she took in a few deep breaths and shouted at him.

“Arnav please go back home, please stop hurting me like this”

“And what about you hurting me Khushi? Isn’t my love your worth? Why can’t we be together and everything would just be perfect”

“I have explained that to you, stop making me do it again, just go away from here”

“I’m not moving from here unless you agree to come back home with me Khushi”

“You know that isn’t ever going to happen”

“Fine, then this isn’t also going to happen, you go back and sleep, I’m fine here, and I’ll wait here as long as it takes to convince you”

“If you think by doing all this you’ll convince me then no Arnav you can’t, by hurting yourself like this you are just hurting me more and more, and if that’s what you want, to give me pain, I’ll happily take it” Khushi said as she shut back the window and walked to her bed angrily.

It was becoming impossible to convince him to go back home.




Oct 14

What Shall I Name This Love?... Part 37 (By Taanihalai) (Thanked: 79 times)

Tu hi bata mere maula… tu hi bata mere rabba…

Khushi kept lying on her bed for the rest of the night just hoping Arnav would leave without her because what she was doing wasn’t for herself but for him and he had to understand that. There was no way she could be with him even because she knew once day everyone would get to know about the truth and maybe then it would be very difficult for Arnav.

She stood up and walked towards the window as she peeped through it and found Arnav sited yet on the bench, she dint know what to do, only if she could do something to convince him to go back but he was so adamant.

Faasle milon ko ke hain… dono hai alag hi disha…

Kabhi yeh mil payenge… nahi kisiko hai pata…

She walked towards the cuoboard and pulled out a blanket as she headed downstairs, no matter how adamant he was, she couldn’t stop caring about her and it was really cold outside so the least she could do for him was this.

“Take this, if you’re planning to spend the rest of the night here thinking such kind of an emotional blackmail would make me change my decision” Khushi said as she threw the blanket on him.

“Who knows maybe you will, and I will do anything for you to change that decision, but anyway you should go back inside it’s very cold out here and I don’t want you to get sick”

“So do you think I want you to get sick? Why don’t you stop this Arnav? Just go back home and all will be okay”

“Nothing is going to be okay without you Khushi”

Ek baat usme bhi hai… to ek baat usme bhi hai…

Hai dhoop sa woh agar… woh chaandni raat si hai…

Mil paaye kabhi dono kya teri isme hai raza…

Khushi stood there still not knowing what to say, yes she couldn’t deny that she loved him and she wanted to be with him, but she knew that wasn’t the right thing to do.

As much as she wanted to hug him right now and tell him she was ready to go with him, she couldn’t, she dint want to give him any sort of miseries.

Na paas aa sake na dur jaa sake…

Agar pyaar inko kheenche… takraar inko roke…

“Look at me Khushi” Arnav said as he stood and walked closer to her, holding her hand in his as he looked into her eyes.

“I know it’s difficult for you and I understand why you are doing this but I just wish you could understand that for me nothing else matters more than being with you…

I don’t care what the society will think about you and I want you not to care also, it’s your life why should you live it on other people’s terms or be scared of what they’ll think of you or me? As long as we both would be happy none of it would matter.”

Yun to bade hai inke kadam… inhe raasta tu hi dikha…

Tu h bata mere maula… tu bata mere rabba…

“I really wish it was going to be as simple as you are saying Arnav and but I know it isn’t… all I care for right now is you and if for that I have to go against you I will, because I love you… I really do” Khushi said as tears rolled down her eyes.

Iss pyaar ko kya naam doon? Iss Pyaar ko kya naam doon?

She ran back inside and locked herself in her room once again, as much as she tried to make things easier, the harder they became.

She knew she was weak for Arnav and if he kept on doing this he would soon convince her to go back with him but she dint want that to happen no matter what.

 

There was a knock at the door of Khushi’s room early next morning. Khushi woke up in seconds just hoping Arnav was okay because she was so sure he had spent the whole night outside being stubborn.

She rushed to open the door and found Mr. Singhania standing in front of her, she ignored him and walked back inside her room as she checked out on Arnav through the window.

He had managed to sleep on the bench covered with the blanket she had taken for him at night, and right now he was deep asleep.

“I am sorry Khushi, I was wrong every time” Mr. Singhania said as he walked in.

“If you are here to apologize please leave, I don’t want to listen to a speech of thirty minutes on how you regret everything and stuff, I’ve got better things to do”

“No I’m not here to do that”

“Great then, come straight to the point”

“I was wrong when I hated Arnav, I thought he was poor and he dint deserve you, I thought he would never be able to give you the luxury I gave you and he wouldn’t be able to keep you happy like I did but now I realize that I never kept you happy.

Despite the little he has, at least he managed to make you fall for him and he even managed to bring out the pain you’d been hiding for so long…

I was wrong for hating him because now I know you would never find a better man than him, he would always keep you happy”

“I know that, he’s a gem of a person”

“Then why are you doing this to him? He’s been out there the whole night, why don’t you just go with him and live both your lives happily?”

“Are you trying to tell me that now finally you’re concerned for you daughter Mr. Singhania?”

“I was always concerned Khushi, I know I made mistakes and after your mother died I dint concentrate much on you but that doesn’t mean that I dint love you or care for you”

“If you cared, you should have done something to make me believe that you did”

“The topic here isn’t about me Khushi, it’s about you and Arnav”

“And you have no right to make a decision for me on that”

“I am your father and I have every right to make decisions for you, so now stop acting so immature, you and I both know that this is just the beginning, if he had to he would stay on that bench for the rest of his life just for you, are you unable to see that or what?”

“I am able to see what kind of future he beholds with me and I don’t want that for him”

“And who are you decide on it? No one can see the future and neither do we know what it beholds for us, and just because of that fear of what will happen we don’t stop living our lives Khushi.

What you’re doing isn’t going to save your future, it’s just going to make you both keep on fighting like this to convince each other”

“So what do you want me to do? Go back with him and destroy his life?”

“Who knows maybe you’ll be able to keep him happy and not actually destroy his life? See it from his perspective Khushi, when he loves you so much and isn’t even worried about anything else, why are you?

Haven’t you knowing him well enough? He was always aware of how much I hated him but did you ever see him being affected by it even for a moment? He is a strong man Khushi and he knows how to handle such things and to ignore things which would bring negativity in his life, it’s just for you to understand that and stop worrying about what will happen.”

“And why are you here telling me all this right now?”

“Because I’ve seen how much he loves you and I want you to live your life with him, I want you to fulfil your dreams of your wedding, I want you both to get married once again with everything being the way you wanted it to be, I just want you to stay happy and maybe that will be the little I’ll do just to repent for what I had done to you in the past”

Khushi sat down on the bed trying to replay all the words in her mind once again.

“I don’t want to force you for anything and this is completely your decision but please think about what I said once and then decide on what you want”

Khushi nodded as Mr. Singhania walked away leaving her alone to think on what she wanted.




Oct 17

What Shall I Name This Love?... Part 38 (By Taanihalai) (Thanked: 76 times)

Arnav woke up around eight o’clock when the sun had fully rose burning his body with the heat.

He looked around and found the blanket lying down the bench, he couldn’t believe he had actually fallen asleep here that too so peacefully he woke up past his normal time.

He stretched his arms lazily as his eyes went direct to the window of Khushi’s room hoping to see her but the window was shut.

He sat on the bench and looked at the entrance of the mansion, Mr. Singhania was walking out followed by two servants who were carrying some files, he unlocked the car while the servant put the files in the car and the headed back inside.

Mr. Singhania stood there looking at Arnav who was staring back at him, he smiled and walked towards him making Arnav feel a bit uncomfortable, he had no idea what sort of a conversation they were going to have.

Arnav moved aside making space for Mr. Singhania who sat next to him, it all felt so awkward after all this while when he’d know how much Mr. Singhania disliked him.

He sat there silently trying to think what to say to him or what to do when Mr. Singhania spoke up.

“You were right Arnav” he said leaving him a bit surprised.

“Sorry, I was right about what?” Arnav asked trying to sound normal but he was all confused and not being able to understand what was happening.

“You were right when you said I dint deserve forgiveness and you’d never want Khushi to forgive me, I know I failed as a husband and I failed as a father too.

I am no trying to justify my actions, but I want you to know that no matter what I have always loved Khushi and I always wanted to see her happy.

All this money and this empire was all for her, I had seen life much worse than you’d imagine and all I ever wished for was I dint want my daughter to see that and I worked hard but maybe I got so lost into earning a life for her I forgot to live with her.

I just want you to know I am really sorry for what happened to her and as her father I am really grateful for what you are doing for her, for seeing past all the things she has gone through and today I want to thank you whole heartedly, I wasn’t able to save my daughter but you did that and no matter what I do, I’ll not be able to repay you”

“It’s okay Mr. Singhania, you don’t have to thank me for anything, all that I’m doing is for the girl I love, that’s it”

“Khushi is really lucky to have someone like you to love her”

“I am lucky to have her too”

Mr. Singhania stood up as he bid Arnav goodbye and headed back to his car, he got inside the car and drove off while Arnav sat there yet staring at the door, he was hoping to see Khushi.

He sat there for another half an hour until he finally saw Khushi walking out with a tray in her hand and she was smiling, which quite surprised him.

“You want to take a shower or have breakfast first?” Khushi asked as she settled down next to him.

Arnav looked at the tray, it smelled of food but it was covered so he couldn’t exactly figure out what it was.

“I’m really hungry and I’d love to eat but not until you agree to come back home with me”

“Really Arnav, you are yet stubborn?”

“Just like you my dear wife” Arnav said making Khushi blush deep red.

“I am sorry, you had to spend the whole night here because of me, and I was being stupid and stubborn, I am really sorry” Khushi said as she placed the tray down and moved closer to him hugging him.

“Does this mean you are ready to go home with me?” Arnav asked hopefully.

“I’ll answer that if you promise to eat first”

“Okay fine I’ll eat but if you’re going to feed me with your own hands, you know I’m a typical Bollywood movie lover, so I expect this things” he smiled

“No, you’re just a kid who yet wants to be fed” Khushi giggled as she picked up the tray again and uncovered it.

“I am not really good at cooking but I tried for you, now eat it and tell me how you like it” Khushi said as she picked up the spoon took a scoop and fed him.

Arnav ate silently as she continued feeding him without saying a word, he really had been hungry because he finished everything in just like five minutes.

“I’m still waiting for your comments you see” Khushi said as he took the last bite.

“Well, it was really good, and that’s why I dint say anything, I dint have enough words to explain how tasty it was, first of all because you cooked it with so much love, secondly because you fed me with your own hand and thirdly because of that smile you had on your face continuously, it was just amazing.”

“You were right, you are the typical Bollywood lover” Khushi smiled as she picked up everything and stood up.

“Where are you going, I ate because you said you’ll tell me if you are coming home with me or not and now you are just going without saying a thing” Arnav said

“Well if I don’t go back inside, how will I pack my things to come back home with you” Khushi looked at him with a huge smile on her face.

“What really?” Arnav asked as he stood up in surprise.

“Yes really, not get inside and take a shower while I pack my things for forever”

“For forever” Arnav said with a smile as he walked inside the mansion with her.

Khushi stood outside at the door while Arnav rushed inside to make the preparations of welcoming her back.

“How long Arnav?” She asked

“Just a minute, I’m almost done, have to welcome you home properly, this time at least” he said as he rushed to the door from the kitchen.

He had a vessel full of rice that he placed in the middle of the entrance and then he rushed back to the kitchen and came back with a golden plate with water mixed with vermillion.

“Now you can come inside” He said as he watched Khushi give a slight push to the vessel with her leg and then stepped into the plate as she walked inside leaving behind red marks of her feet.

“Welcome home wifey” Arnav smiled as he led her to their room.

“Isn’t anyone home today?”

“No, Aakash went out for some work, Anjali’s out with her friends making most of her last days here, thanks to you she’ll be able to fulfil her dream of studying at oxford so yeah, we are all alone here and there’s one thing we can do”

“What?” Khushi asked hesitantly.

“Talk, about your past, about everything that’s been hurting you, about whoever did that to you because they deserve punishment and I’m going to make sure they get it”

Khushi looked at him while she sat on the bed silently and he walked towards her, sat next to her as he held her hand into his waiting for her to start telling her everything.




Oct 17

What Shall I Name This Love?... Part 39 (By Taanihalai) (Thanked: 68 times)

“Like you know, we had gone out for like a bonfire kind of thing, we were a huge group, there were lots of friends from school including Shrey, even Aakash was there because I had asked him to join me.

So we all were sited together having fun as we played the truth and dare game, it was pretty fun until the bottle stopped on me and I chose a dare, so everyone asked me to lip kiss Shrey as a dare because all our friends thought that Shrey and I were together but I was with Aakash and not him so I obviously refused.

I mean I loved Aakash why would I kiss anyone else apart from him, Aakash and I had kept our relationship secret and that was his choice, he thought our friends would judge him for dating me because my dad was so rich and stuff so I did like he told me.

That day when I refused to kiss Shrey everyone started saying I should do the dare but I had made my decision, I stood up angrily to leave when Shrey stopped me” Khushi said as she looked at Arnav, she was trembling nervously as if whatever she was saying was happening here once again.

“He… He said it was just a kiss and it wasn’t a big deal, and despite of me refusing repeatedly, he forced a kiss on me and all the while I kept on looking at Aakash hoping he would stand up and stop him, he was my boyfriend Arnav, he was the one to keep me safe, to keep guys like Shrey away from me but all he did was to watch silently while everyone else cheered for Shrey as if he was doing something great.

I can’t forget it Arnav, I can’t forget how it felt, I felt like I was some show piece and anyone who would have wanted would have kissed me, it made me feel dirty and cheap and even after I pushed Shrey away angrily and gave him a tight slap, Aakash dint do a thing, he sat there like a statue.

I can’t tell you how heartbroken I felt around all those people I believed to be my friends, and anyway what would I have expected from them if my own boyfriend wasn’t a man enough to stand up for me?

I was all hurt and broken, I rushed away from there all alone crying so badly, the night I had expected to be the most beautiful time of our school days turned out to be the worst night of my life all because of Shrey and Aakash, and all those people I used to call my friends.

I remember Aakash followed me after I left from there, I had just reached a bit further when he called out my name.

“Khushi! Please stop” he said as he ran towards her.

He got hold of her hand and pulled her back, he looked at her and she couldn’t see even a bit of shame on his face for treating her like this, he acted as if everything was completely normal.

“I’ll take you home”

“Why?” She asked

“It’s dark and I have to keep you safe, what if something happens to you, I won’t be able to forgive myself” Aakash said

“Well then congratulations Aakash, you just achieved the milestone, you already did everything to make sure I wasn’t safe”

“What are you talking about Khushi?”

“Look at you, is it that you’re so naïve or the stupidest man on earth? Dint you see what happened back there Aakash? Dint you see Shrey trying to kiss me forcefully? And if you really were so worried about my safety why dint you stand up for me? Why dint you pull him away from me and gave him a tight slap on his face for daring to look at me even?”

“Khushi you know that would have revealed out relationship”

“So hiding our relationship status was more important than me? You just made me question my decision of being with you Aakash.

You clearly showed me that you are ashamed of being with me and I am sorry I don’t want to spend the rest of my life with a man like you who has to keep our relationship a secret because of such stupid reasons.

I was the foolish one, I though you loved me and cared for me but thank God I saw this terrible side of yours too, now listen to me for once and for all, we are over Aakash, I don’t want to have anything with you not even friendship, from today onwards you are a stranger for me and I don’t want to see you face ever again” Khushi said as she ran away crying bitterly.

“Oh My God! How could he? I always thought my brother was strong he did so much for us but I never realized he had done something like this to you” Arnav said in shock.

“I had loved him Arnav and I hadn’t also expected that I’ll ever see that side of his too” Khushi said as she got hold of his arm and leaned her head on his shoulder.

“What happened then?”

Khushi held his arm tighter as she shut her eyes, she knew what she was going to tell him from now onwards was going to hurt so much worse, but maybe telling him about it would make her feel a bit light than having had kept this to herself all this years.

I left from there, all I knew was I wanted to go home and lock myself inside my room, I dint want to see any of those people’s face ever again in my life.

I was so angry I dint care about anything, the garden where we were having the bonfire wasn’t much further, it was at a walking distance to my home and I thought I would walk home all myself.

Although it was really dark and I was scared I had no option and Aakash on the other side who had been claiming to be worried about my safety a while back dint give a damn after I told him off, he just let me go all alone knowing how dangerous it could have been for me to walk the streets all alone at that time of the night.

I gathered enough courage and walked away to head back home and not even one of those friends of mine decided to come behind me or even apologize, they made it all look like it was my fault.

I was almost half way when I felt like someone was following me, it turned around but couldn’t see anyone, the street was dark and empty.

As much as I was scared, I had no option, I was in the middle of the way and I could have either gone back, or gone home and I chose to go home.

I would walk a few steps and get this strange feeling or something just happened to make me feel like I was being followed but I couldn’t see anyone.

I was scared and I was shivering with cold and all the strange things that were happening made me more scared so I decided to run, I just hoped I was going to reach home before anything went wrong but…”

“Hey… it’s okay if you don’t want to talk about it right now” Arnav said as he held her in his arms.

“No Arnav, I have to fight it, I have to fight that feeling” Khushi said as she hugged him back tighter while tears rolled down her eyes as she shivered and trembled.

“I tried to run but suddenly a man came in from of me from nowhere, I was scared… I dint know what to do, I turned back thinking I would be able to run faster than him to the opposite direction and I found another one standing behind me.

My heart almost stopped beating, I wasn’t sure of what to do, I felt trapped in between two strangers who dint seem to be good at all.”

She clutched Arnav’s shirt and held it tight in her arms as all those terrible memories flashed in her mind.

“I dint give up Arnav, I tried to run away from both of them and I managed to for a while but the got me and…”

Khushi was sobbing so badly by now and Arnav felt completely helpless he kept on holding her tighter in his arms but he knew nothing would help, nothing was ever going to take away those terrible memories from her mind.

“I tried to scream for help but one of them just slapped me and then shutting my mouth they both took me away from the roadside, I tried all I could in my strength, I kicked them and tried to escape but I wasn’t strong enough.

They took me to something like a hut nearby, it was all dark and I had just a bed, they threw me on the bed and tied me up there, I tried to scream and he tied a piece of cloth on my mouth and then they… they both…” Khushi broke down completely.

She couldn’t speak anymore, she felt so weak so hurt she couldn’t explain.

“It’s okay… you don’t have to say anything further Khushi, I’m right here with you and I am so sorry for what happened, I wish I could do anything to change it.. I know how you are feeling now although I can’t even understand what kind of pain you must have gone through, I am here for you and I’ll make sure I keep you safe always” Arnav said as he held her so tight into his arms.




Oct 19

What Shall I Name This Love?... Part 40 (By Taanihalai) (Thanked: 59 times)

Arnav sat with her holding her in his arms making sure he made her believe that she was safe and now that he was with her he was going to keep her safe always, Khushi couldn’t stop feeling hurt, she had hidden her pain deep inside herself for so long and today when she brought it out, it was hurting her worse than she’d ever thought.

“You know Arnav when I was young, I used to wear mom’s wedding dress and go stand in front of the mirror admiring myself, just like every girl out there I had also dreamt of a wedding, of a prince charming.

I always used to tell mom about how I was going to design my own wedding dress and how beautiful it was going to be, I used to be so excited about it until that incident…

But I dint give up Arnav, I tried to stay strong and no matter what happened, I believed that I was going to get married and I was going to design my own wedding dress.

When I reached back home afterwards, I had shut myself up completely, at times I used to sit in the hall just crying, Mr. Singhania would come do whatever he wanted to and leave, he never bothered even for once to ask me how I was doing or how life was, not even when he could see his own daughter not looking fine in front of his eyes.

No matter what he does, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to forgive him because at the point of my life where I needed my father the most he was with me, he just turned out to be like Shrey and Aakash, and I had to depend on my own.

I finished my school and studied fashion designing because despite of whatever that happened, my dream of becoming a bride never died.

One day he came to me and told me there was this guy Ajay and he was interested in me so maybe if I’d like him too, he could get me married, I thought maybe life was giving me a second chance, maybe my father had started caring about me and maybe I was going to get married and maybe someday I would actually be happy.

I agreed to meet Ajay and dad called him and his family home, so the usual happened, Ajay and I were sent to a room all alone to decide if we liked each other, he told me he’d seen me around and how much he liked me and all, as for me I dint find him bad either, he was sweet and polite and he just seemed to be like a good person and I felt like I could trust him.

I dint want a relation based on lies or hidden truths so I decided to tell him about what had happened to me, he looked shocked and sat there still for a moment, I thought that maybe he was going to understand that there was no fault of mine in whatever happened but he proved me wrong, he stood up suddenly and walked away.

I can’t tell you what it felt like Arnav, just a while back he had been telling me how much he liked me and everything and the very next moment he stood up and walked away like I was a complete stranger to him, I knew what was going to happen so I dint even bother to follow him, I just stayed in my room and you know what made it worse? My own father dint even bother to come and talk to me, or to ask me how it was or what happened.

I dint see him for two weeks after that, and that was when I decided that I had to forget my dream, that no matter how educated we get, when a girl gets raped we would always find it her fault or find her impure for us, so a girl who was raped never deserved to get married.

Since the there was this hatred that developed inside my heart and somewhere I thought all my problems and sufferings were because of boys, firstly my father, then Shrey and then Aakash and then those guys who did this to me and then Ajay, all the guys I met always ended up showing me how terrible they were and so I just hated them all.

I decided I wasn’t ever going to think about getting married ever again and I was doing fine with that until Shrey came back and thought after all that I had gone through because of him I was going to get married to him.

I am sorry for what I did with you Arnav, I forced you to kidnap him and then marry me, I wouldn’t have ever done that if it wasn’t for the plan going wrong, I am really sorry.”

“It’s okay Khushi, I understand you and you don’t have to be sorry for anything, the people who should have been sorry will be, I’ll make sure I get you justice.” Arnav said

“But how Arnav, I don’t even remember their faces well, I told you it was dark, I just could see them but not very clearly and it’s been years I don’t even know where they might be or anything, how are we ever going to get justice?”

“Can’t you remember even a bit? That might help us?”

“No, only that hut they took me to but I don’t want to go back to that place again Arnav, I don’t want to be haunted by all those terrible memories” Khushi said as she held him tight.

“Don’t worry, I’ll deal with it on my own anyway Mrs. Khushi Raizada you have twenty four hours, go to work, design the perfect wedding dress for yourself because you and I are getting married again tomorrow, I don’t want that dream of your to be left unfulfilled.”

“But we did get married Arnav”

“Not the way you wanted to, so come on now get going, meanwhile I’ll finish up something else” Arnav said as he stood up and looked at Khushi.

“You know you are so unpredictable at times”

“I’m just like my wife” He giggled as Khushi gave him looks.

 

Arnav knocked at the door of Aakash’s room as Aakash opened the door.

“Arnav! You’re back. Where were you? I called you I left you messages, I was so worried”

“I was correcting a few things bro, I’m here to do the same”

“What do you mean?”

“I am here to talk about Khushi, shall we? You need to know what happened to her that day when you left her to go home all alone not thinking that she was the girl you loved and she wasn’t going to be safe all alone on the road at night but you chose not to accompany her”

Aakash nodded as he walked inside his room followed by Arnav.

“You should know this because directly on indirectly, you were one of the reasons why it happened, you never stood up for the girl you loved and no matter how much I love you and I’ve always admired you, I must tell you that what you did was terrible, it was cowardly and you should have stood up for her but if you couldn’t do that you should have at least made sure she reached home safe when she left from there but it clearly seemed like you dint bother much.

I don’t want any explanations because I think there would be nothing more important than making sure a girl was going to reach home safely and you dint do that so you must know what happened.

That night when you left Khushi and dint even bother to go behind her as she walked back home, she was all alone on the way and she was raped by two horrible men, it’s only time until I find them and make sure they get punished but you have to know this, you have to know she was raped and you were one of the reasons why!

I want you to feel guilty and I want you to feel hurt because if you would have accompanied her that day then she wouldn’t have gone through that.

That was point number one, now number two, you’ll meet Shrey and you’ll tell him this because he was the main reason why it happened and he has to know it, I’ll make sure he at least goes to jail for harassing Khushi, I don’t want to see his face because I might do something wrong, and number three now, I want you to take me to the place where you were that night, I need to find those criminals and that’s the only place I’ll start from, I’m giving you some minutes to digest the truth, I’ll be waiting outside, join me when you’re okay” Arnav said as he headed back to the door.

“Arnav, I am sorry” Aakash said from behind.

“You should be bro, you should be sorry” Arnav said as he walked away without turning to look at him.




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