My second love

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Mar 8

30. Behind the facade (By Spriya) (Thanked: 70 times)





Khushi POV


"Arnav stop... Arnav" I yelled chasing him.


He did stop and in glee I speed up my pace. Stretching my arms to get hold of him, I only kicked the air as he ran past and damn I missed him in an arm distance.


"Catch me if you can"


He challenged before disappearing from my sight.


Frowning I ran towards the direction he went. Ignoring my panting form I raised my hand to hit him when I held him captivated in a room by cleverly locking the door.


"Khushi no..." He shrieked when I took slow steps with a winning smile.


Smiling inwardly at his form, I crooked a smirk outwardly "Someone challenged me to catch him, where is he?"


"He's standing opposite to you" He smirked.


Hopping from my place I caught his arm in a tight grip.


"Seriously will you beat your husband?" Asked he with his inexistent innocence.


"Haan, I'll do more than that if you keep pulling my leg" I answered without thinking.


"What more will you do?" Suddenly I heard him so near me. In a blink he closed the distance between us almost hovering over my frame.


I found myself reacting to his nearness. The way my nerves reacted to his closeness thrilled me to the core. He has brown orbs, shh... It was chocolate brown. Budding hairs on my cheeks stood straight in anticipation when my eyes captured his one day old stubble. His sharp nose was just a mere millimetre apart from mine. His lips was... Wait his lips are moving...


Shaking my head to clear the sinful thoughts that distracted me for a  while, I breathed out. Listening to him carefully, I realised he's repeating his question.


"I'll hit you with belan" I replied instantly and showed my big eyes dramatically.


"No.."


Not a second passed, I heard his horrified shriek and what mortified me was his expression. God, it looks like he visualised the scene.


"That's horrible Khushi, seriously" He asked still rotting in his  bewilderment.


"Wait let me show the sample then" Giggling I raised my hand to hit him.


"Waitttt..." He squealed refraining me from hitting him.


Wriggling my form I tried to release myself from him "No, let me show you. Only after seeing the sample, you'll be able to decide about the main course"


His plam held my wrists above my head.


"Leave me arnav..."


Twisting my hands, I wriggled more as a reflex his hold tightened.


"Arnav leave me na..."


Attempting to get release, I raised my toes a little more but it backfired letting me land straightly on his chest losing the balance. His hand lowered down balancing me.


I waited for him to leave my hand and pave way to extract our closeness. Instead he bend down a little and asked in whisper.


"Where was this khushi these days? Where did you hide her?"


I snapped my head at his question. What did he mean by that?


"What?"


"This khushi, where did you hide her these days?" His eyes bore my soul like his question did.


Yes, where's this khushi went these days? The Khushi earlier was not at all rude not at all loud. She loves to enjoy everything around her, Isn't she? Where was she?


"What are... you... talking? It's.. nothing like that..." I stuttered lowering my eyes feeling difficult to lie.


He raised my chin with his index finger "Really, you don't know what I am talking about but you can say it's nothing like that"


I slapped myself mentally for this stupid escape.


"Why?" He asked again toning down his words.


I gazed at him for few minutes before lowering my head again "I don't know" My two petals synced answering his question.


"What do you mean by, I don't know? It's your born trait, character, your uniqueness khushi. You should be identified by your real nature not by the way you're showing now. Don't you think you should live for yourself without being so hard on yourself" His whisper made me to lose in some other world.


Why did I change? Is it again because of Siddharth, yes! But now I decided to give a chance to my relationship with Arnav, Ain't I? Then what was the need to carry the baggage of past by losing the original ME. What did I gain by that? Infact I lost more. Family celebrations, their love, care, attention, affection, happiness, my friends and finally ME who was altogether person in past.


My trance was broken when he cup my face turning it to face him.


"Tear the facade, let others know you by real you"


"Do you think I was wearing a facade?" I felt vulnerable from inside. No one asked me to tear my facade, or I didn't cared!


"You know the answer Khushi, yet you're asking me. Why?" He asked in hushed tone.


Without processing my words and decision like I do earlier I said whatever come on my mind at instant  "I am afraid"


He circled his both hands around my waist pulling me towards him providing enough warm like a cocoon "Why?"


"Hah..."


"Why are you afraid?" He spelled the words as if like asking to a kid. His eyes which having care, concern and love melted me and I found myself leaning my head on his chest.


"Woh... Siddharth..." I started to open up and only then I realised few truths are still hidden from him.


Breaking the hug I held his palm in mine "Arnav, I.. there are few things from my past was still hidden to you... if I say now... will... Will you treat me... same like you're doing now? Will you... accept me...? Will you... trust me...?"


I asked with batted breath hoping against hope. Never ever I was so desperate for answers like I am standing now. Anxious, worry, fear, recklessness and every damn emotion was mixed up making me feel jittery. If Arnav took time to answer then my feet will automatically give up.


He put his another palm above me enclosing it and squinted his eyes in acceptance. Breathed out, I thought relaxed but it was multifolded when the truth keeps haunting my conscious and for the same my heart galloped against the ribcage.


Swallowing the uneasiness I opened my mouth to say but words seems slipped out if my mind. All of sudden even I forget my mother tongue. My insides started to shudder fearing the consequences. How can I say it to him? How'll he bear the truth? No one in his place can bear that truth, then how can I expect him to be calm and asks him the same even before I let out the truth.


"Khushi.."


Snapping back from the thoughts, I pressed my plam against him gaining courage from it.


"Arnav... I... was molested in my.. college" I heard his gasp and continued without waiting for his reply as I fear my courage will break down if he interrupts me "Siddharth was the one who saved me at correct time.. else.. I don't know what would be the consequences... He... He supported me throughout my trauma, I... I become afraid of man's touch. He... He stood beside me as the sole pillar of my college life. When.. when I was completely out of it as per doctor's treatment I accepted Siddharth proposal. He stood beside me every single minute of my two years of life... Sometimes he demanded some things from me too. Like that... One... One day... I went to his home as I was supposed to meet my parents but couldn't and he.. he asked me to come over his home to erase my homesick. I obeyed his words... Trust me Arnav I didn't let him have his way..."


"What you didn't let him have his way?" Asked he cautiously.


Fluttering my lids I refused to meet his eyes as a result of guilt.


"I.. We.. he wished to take... take our relationship.. to next level. I.. did oppose trust me b...but" I closed my eyes couldn't able to say him the truth.


"But... It ended up... He kissed me here" I pointed towards my lips.


"Trust me I didn't let him to continue, I pushed him and scolded him a lot and didn't spoke to him for whole week" I jumped him clearing my stance, lest he feel bad.


All of sudden he laughed... Seriously laugh... LAUGH!!!


I opened and closed my mouth like a fish out of water not able to think what made him laugh.


"Still there're few things to say about my past" That did stop his laughter.


He raised his brows in question.


"After his.. death... His parents blamed me for my.. misfortune. They said because of me they lost... their son. My ill luck only swallowed his life... I lost my interest to live as I believed I was ill fated. They said I was a curse. More than Siddharth death his parents words glued in my brain" I closed my eyes and felt wet at my cheeks.


I opened my eyes when his thumb wiped that away gently.


"You're not at fault. It's his bad luck that he's no more. Don't your brain works, if I was fit and fiddle standing before you even after bearing you then you're not a curse. And... Regarding your stupid guilty conscious.. thennn..." He trailed down after making me feel better.


I scrutinized my gaze at him "I too kissed girls"


I gaped at him open mouth, what does he mean by GIRLS???


"Arnav..." I shrieked and he winked.


Damn it!!!


How can he kiss any girl? He should only kiss me!!!






_____






Apr 9

31.I am sorry (By Spriya) (Thanked: 55 times)

Khushi POV


Damn! He kissed GIRLS!!!


How can he kiss any girl? He should only kiss me!!!


"What, I should only kiss you?"


Did I say it loud? ****!!!!


"Khushi I am waiting" I heard him again.


"Ahh.. it's nothing..." I stuttered planning to fly out from there.


Turning my heels, I could've ran escaping from him if only he didn't trap me pasting my front physique against the door.


My breathing got laboured as his pounding heart was pressed against my back and I can feel it's galloping against the ribcage like mine overcoming all the shields of clothes.


His right palm was over mine above our head at the lock. Taking a sharp breath, I closed my eyes feeling his another hand on my waist moving around a while searching for a place.


'Leave me' I want to say it but words seem to betray.


My breath got stuck in throat, choking me when he whispers on my left ear as his breath tickles my senses "What do you said?"


Quickly scanning my brain for a perfect reply which would shut him, I failed to come up with one.


"Are you jealous?"


The already thudding heart took its pace letting my chest heaving up and down. Nervousness occupied it's space in my whole system.


Swallowing the saliva, I nodded as no when I couldn't even have strength to deny by words.


"Oh really??"


Drowning into the sensuous web he created, I couldn't remember what I answered him.


"No need to be jealous, it's all on the past and it was just an accident, that too only once"


Turning around swiftly I questioned in disbelief "Then why did you said 'you kissed GIRLS'?"


He smirked leaning down. Panicking I kept my hand on his chest refraining him from coming closer.  


Giving a amusing look "If I did not tell that, I wouldn't have come to know your jealousy side" he finished with a cheeky smile.


"I am not jealous" I denied pushing him.


"Too late to lie babyy.. you already gave me an answer"


That means, I admitted my jealousy. ****! I reprimanded clenching my jaw. Suddenly I felt exposed even though I was fully covered.


I heard him sharp intake of breath and he raised my face cupping it.


"There is no need to feel awkward. We're husband and wife and we accepted the relationship wholeheartedly, aren't we?" Asked he tucking my few tendrils.


I found myself nodding as there's no point in being delusional and dwell on my past. After sharing my past to him, my heart felt so light and having a feel of losing few pounds of weight for own good all of sudden.


"Then, I should applaud myself. Finally, I mean FINALLY you accepted our marriage"


I couldn't help but chuckle hearing the way he pronounced the term finally. Drama king...


"Okeyyy... Don't you think it's time to celebrate for getting success in crossing the first barrier?" He asked resuming our old position, his both hands effortlessly circled around my waist and was entwined at my back. Our chest was crashing against each other granting no way for heart to resume it's normal phase. I have no way to balance myself without clinging into him with my palms on his shoulders. His hold feels so secure, possessive and protective.


"Don't.. don't you think you turned bold in a single day?" I asked pointing to our closeness.


"Is it? You know I love my wife sooo much to leave her for a minute. And I got her after several days, so isn't it normal?" He said with such cuteness that I want nothing but to pinch his cheeks.


"But your wife needs sometime to  accept this new change in her life and to welcome intimacy. I don't think she'll appreciate it, if you cross your boundary" Indirectly I told him what I want to convey to him.


"Come on yaar, how much time will you take?" He whined like a child.


"It depends on my husband, you know he promised to impress me" I said with a tinge of mischief.


"Oh yeah, he was always seen lost in thoughts. Maybe he's trying hard to impress his wife, but you know his wife is strong headed. She'll not share her likes and dislikes with him then how'll he plan her surprises then?"


Seriously, he's drama king. I slapped him playfully "Don't be a drama king Arnav. You already have your wife's encyclopaedia with you, then what is the need to do drama?"


"What encyclopaedia?" He asked feign innocent or he seriously innocent.


"Meera, isn't she the one who's providing you my likes and dislikes?" I questioned pretending to think.


"That was before you accept me but now I don't want my wife to face the wrath of his sister"


"Ahh... So much concern for your wife.. I see" I rolled my eyes dramatically.


"Don't be jealous on her too" He chuckled as I hit him.


"I thought only Anika was playfull, but you too?"


"That's because you never paid attention to me"


His voice sounds little painful. Did I tortured him in past? Oh... He must have felt bad na. I should ask apology.


"Arnav... I... I... Am sorry. I made you go through a lot na. I never thought about you, I was immersed in my own misery that I found you as my... my punchbag. I find solace in hurting you, how saddist it was... Sometimes I felt bad for you but thinking you deliberately marrying me even after reading my letter I got into my earlier mode. I.. It's so cruel of me to separate you from your family by dragging you here without even giving assurance of our marriage. As honest, If I was in your place, I must have left the person by now... You're a gem Arnav, sometimes I feel you deserve better person than me. I may open up now but I can't guarantee that I'll not go back to my shell once this night passes. I carries many baggage of flaws Arnav. Sometimes I may sound rude, sometimes I'll ignore you for no reason, sometimes I'll speak my heart out like I am doing now, sometimes I'll confuse myself dragging you in my mess and family, sometimes I may remember.. Siddharth. It's not easy to forget my whole four years of life just like that. That's why I am saying, I need time. I don't want to hurt you after giving you hopes. I want to mend myself before concentrating on you. I want myself matching to your personality. I want to change many things in me" I let my shoulders to droop realising how much flaws I am carrying. How big task I have to handle.


My chin was lifted once again obviously by him.


"Didn't I said you to stay real. I fell for the real you. You don't need to change yourself for me, but change for yourself"


My heart swell with pride. What fortune did I done that I get him as my husband. Wait did he said he fell for real me. When did he saw the real me.


"Arnav, it's been four years since I lost my real self then how could you fell the real me?" I asked in confusion.


"Oh, yeah... That was some five years back approximately" he replied coolly.


But I got horrified, five years!!! "What?"






_________________



Sorry for late update guys. Henceforth updates will be regular as i have much more chapters in hand. Hope you all like the update.

Started new fiction named "BEYOND THE WORLD" a reincarnation story in wattpad,Give it a try.


Thank you for all who pressed Thank you and commented on previous chapter. Wishing the same for this chapter too.





Apr 11

32. Rapid fire (By Spriya) (Thanked: 56 times)

Khushi POV


"What, five years???" I asked scandalized by the mere thought of him loving me from past five years yet he didn't have the honour of his love. How cruel??


He pursued his lips making me restless.


"What are the all things you hid from me Arnav?" I asked with batted breath. All of sudden I feel so vulnerable.


Why didn't he approached me then?


Why didn't he mention it before?


Why didn't he take measures to come close to me?


Hell, I didn't even know his existence at that time.


He swallowed as I can see his lump moving up and down. He bend down and looked at me with same vulnerable eyes like mine.


Why is he vulnerable now?


Did he kept mum knowing my love for Siddharth? But that does not possible, He only came to know about my love during our reception. He seemed shocked when I told him about my love, Siddharth. What must be the reason?...


Not giving more work to my brain he answered in low voice.


"I didn't realised I loved you back then"


Why my vision is blurring?


Why does my heart wish opposite of it?


Before I could probe further for details, a shrill of ring broke our reverie.


Leaving me, he was engrossed in his call.


He didn't realised he loved me back then, does that mean he was attracted to me.


Oh... Now I realise why didn't he stepped back in earlier days of our marriage. I always had the doubt of him being so familiar with me, now I get it. He likes me since then. That's why even after the torture I put him through, he beared everything with a smile.


Now it's time to do something! Something for him!


I waited for him to finish his call, but he gestured it'll take time. With a heavy sigh, I moved outside.


Trying to indulge in dusting the dining table which was not dirty in the first place, I end up thinking him about him. The thought of him in love with for more than five years, itself chills my spine. And where did he saw me?...


At once I felt so small before him. It seems my love for Siddharth was nothing but a trash infront of his love. Argh... Is it love in first place?


Why always I have to take step back after attempting to raise up?


"Mam.." I turned to side to see Maria standing there hesitating to say something.


Knitting my brows I raised my head gesturing her to tell.


"Mam..woh.. Water is overflowing"


Twisting my lips, I lowered my eyes and gasped in shock. In the name of filling a glass for myself, I poured water on the table beside the glass.


Cursing my stupidity, I ordered her to clean the mess and sprinted from there not wanting to embarrass myself than already I was.


Took a halt at living room, I roamed my eyes around the hallway. Not able to control the anxiety, I stood fidgeting with my own fingers and breathed out when the new revelation keeps haunting me. Until I know his side of story, I am not going to be normal.


Arnav asked for coffee, Least I could do him and distract myself from his new revelation.


Smiling at my current thought, I rummaged the self humming the latest song I heard before Arnav graced his presence from office.


Pouring the milk, I gasped when an hand clasped around my waist.


"Arnavvvv..." Who other than him has audacity to do like this.


"What? I am just admiring my wife, do you have any problem with it?" Asked he as if we're in so much love couple.


Why is he so romantic today? His proximity was fuelling something inside my frame. Heat emitting from his body was burning me into it. My body feels alien even to me. Something inside me pushed me back, and I rested my head on the expanse of his chest.  


Fff..., If I want to think straight then I have to keep myself away from him.


"Arnav please. Don't take advantage just because I am allowing" I said biting my lower lips and curled my toes.


He unclasped his hands sulking "Ok. Meri Grandmaa..."


I snapped back fuming by his choice of words "What?? Grandmaa... Dare you Arnav"


He giggled "First prepare coffee then you can dare until your heart wish grandmaa"


Damn! Here comes the drama king.


I took the coffee mug in my hand and pretended to throw at him. He jumped at his place in shock and winked next moment before running away.


Life would not be same like before. Thankfully, it was changing for good and I was more glad to welcome this change. I couldn't even stop my smile which threaten to slip out by his mere antics.


Mentally praising myself for my first ever handmade coffee for him, I took it outside. He was at the balcony seeing the waves.


Handing him the same, I took my seat beside his chair and intentially cleared my throat to gain his attention.


Today, I have to find out what all he know about me? From when?


"Arnav you never answered my question" I questioned as he took the first sip.


He glanced me "You too never answered my question"


What didn't I answer? And when?


With scrunching brows I asked the same.


"I asked about you. Your likes and dislikes" said he and it took few seconds for me to recall the conversation.


(FB)

-


Oh yeah, he was always seen lost in thoughts. Maybe he's trying hard to impress his wife, but you know his wife is strong headed. She'll not share her likes and dislikes with him then how'll he plan her surprises then?


"Arnav, that's not important now. You tell me, when did you see me? And where? Is this why you agreed to marry me? Is this why you put up with my cruelty? Tell me Arnav"


"Calm down wifey. I am not running away anywhere. And more than your question, mine holds more importance. I need to know you, if everything falls in place I'll answer all your questions" How can he say that calmly when I am sitting here anxiously.


"It's not fair. I'll not tell you" I turned away from him.


"Ok, don't tell me then"


My jaws dropped at his comment. He haven't even show courtesy to my plead. Ok then I'll not tell you, no matter what.


"Khushi, today I gave interview to one of the newspaper"


I don't understand why is he saying this. Not wanting to ask further I hmmed. My excitement was already zeroed by his denial.  


"They did something which had lot of fun and I want to play it with you"


I frowned, he want to play a game. Seriously, are we kids or what?


"Don't be childish Arnav" I shrugged at the thought of playing.


"Why? What is wrong in being childish? Infact being childish will make you feel light, stress free. We, as grown ups got up at morning and stuff breakfast in hurry half eating half spilling and then office with 8hours hectic day and then travel one hour to reach home tiredly after that what, we ate dinner and slept just like that and then again the cycle repeats for next morning. Do tell me, are we happy by living our life like this?"


This is the life, I am having from past four years. He's right. I hadn't been happy since years.


"There's no harm in playing Khushi and we're not going to play run and chase so chill" He said encouraging me.


I nodded accepting his idea.


"Before starting that answer few questions"


I nodded and he asked "Hmm.. Khushi why did you stopped architects from working here? They're supposed to work from today right"


"Hmm yeah, I thought to consult the designs with you as we accepted each other"


"Impressive" Exclaimed he as I wiggled nervously.


"What colour do you like?" Questioned he.


I gaze him sharply but he didn't cared, his eyes was fixated before the waves.


"Won't you answer me?" His dubious voice made me answer to him.


"Pink"


"Flower?"


"Tulip"


"Food?"


"Aloo paratha"


"Cuisine?"


"Indian"


"Hills or beach?"


"Beach"


"Sun or moon?"


"Moon"


"Natural or artificial?"


"Natural"


"Bike ride or car ride?"


"Bike ride"


"Gold or platinum or diamond?"


"Platinum"


"Saree or lehenga?"


"Tops and jeans"


"What! Khushi that was not in the option" He whined in shock.


I giggled at his expression.


"Choose anything from the given option" He insisted keeping his cup down.


Thinking for a minute, I smiled widely "Saree, but did not know how to drape it without dozen of pins. Even then it will slip and pool at my feet" I pouted remembering the day I draped a saree at the first day of our marriage and how hard time I had to walk without stumbling down.


"Don't worry wifey, why I am here? I'll help you in draping your saree. And thank you for playing rapid fire with me. I got to know you better and your likes and dislikes" Saying this he kissed my cheeks and sprinted inside.


What the hell just happened? Damn, he tricked me to know about me. ****, like a fool I fell on his trap.


Gritting my teeth I got up following him "Arnav..."



_____


Apr 12

33. Harbouring feelings (By Spriya) (Thanked: 54 times)

Khushi Pov


I lay on my back in the bed hugging a pillow close to myself. It gives me the feel of him. So soft, so soothing, so warming.


How did I change in just one day that I even shared my past with him which I hid from everyone even from Maya?


Am I started to accept him as a part of my life?


Why is it I am finding peaceful with him without any worry or past clashes?


Only when I was away from him, my thoughts are muddled up.


How could everything happen in one single day?


An unknown fear creeped up, seeing the way my feelings changing drastically towards Arnav.


Is it up for any good?


I didn't find anything bad either.


Would it be a good idea if I let my growing feelings to harbour in my heart?


I recalled how he tricked me to get answers from me. It would be a lie if I say I was angry on him for his act. I love the way how he tackle me in my own way. He's compensating for both of us. He's completing us every time by his behaviour.


What more a girl need than getting a partner who care to keep and protect her own identity and loving the real  one.


He didn't told his side of story, did he? In his rapid fire I forget this. Damn. Let this night fade, I'll ask him.




Flickering my lids, I opened my eyes. Surprisingly the sun was slowly waking up spreading it's rays. It's been years since I woke up early and had a peaceful sleep without tossing and turning in the bed.


Slipping into the sandals, I opened the balcony to feel the fresh air. Something about the surroundings around me give healthy feeling. Something...


Inhaling and exhaling the fresh air, I left outside to see Arnav. I'll surprise him today, after our marriage he's the one who always woke up first and give bed coffee to me. Today I'll do that.


Never I felt a morning as enthusiastic like now. The thought of surprising him was surprising me too. The man whom I ran away from the distance was the one who's making me feel better.


I don't know how did he find my coffee yesterday, for first time I gave him something pleasant unlike bitters in past. And like a fool, I never asked about it drowning in his presence.


Would he like my coffee? Yesterday he asked with so much authority that I felt I belong to someone!


Stirring the coffee, I replayed yesterday events. The change in our relationship was so drastic. How it would be if we become totally love in couple? I felt heat risen on my cheeks, is it the hotness of the coffee or his thoughts.


Shaking my head I took coffee to his room and stood hesitated infront of the closed door.


Do I need to knock it?


But what is the need when he accepted me as his wife.


He accepted you long back, it's YOU who didn't accept him as your husband. If entering into his room will arise problem then it's only for you not for him.


A distant voice screamed on my brain. Shoving aside the hesitation I stepped in without making noise.  


There in the king size bed which can accommodate three more person if we have kids...


What the hell? Kids. Khushi kumari Gupta, what had gotten into you? Shut your stupid heart, I chide myself hitting my head for having those thoughts.


Carefully placing aside the cup in side table I sat beside his elbow.


He looks peaceful in sleeping, Only in sleeping ah?


His few stubborn hairs tenderly touching his forehead, it adds boyish look. Only when the hairs fell down ah? Doesn't he look boyish when he chuckles and tease you?


His ever soft eyes which shines with love and care were closed, giving perfect view of scar.


When did it happened? I found myself caressing the wound.


If the wound have slipped just a little below, what would've happened? I felt horrible to even think the consequences if it had happened.


He squirmed lightly and went back to his sleep as I took back my hands. While withdrawing my palm, I felt his stubble prick my fingers slightly. The prick was rather sweet than worst.


Trailing down my hands, I palmed his cheeks just to enjoy the sweet prickle. It sent jolt down my frame that I literally shivered when he rubbed his face on my palm thinking it was a pillow.


A devilish thought popped in my mind out of nowhere seeing the place where my thumb rested. It was touching the corner of his lips. I caressed them gently with my thumb.


How it would feel against my skin?


Khushi... stop... STOP your thoughts...


I felt once, it was electrifying. But how it would be now when I was ready to participate in it..


What the hell!!! STOP KHUSHI...


It took all ounce of control to stop my dangerous thoughts which were evading my boundary lines.


Jumping up on my feet I called him not trusting my heart.


"Arnav..."


He hmmed with closed eyes and I called him again.


"Arnav..."


Same response, heart win over brain again in a argument and I bend down to his ear.


"Hubby dear, wake up"


"What???"


I cursed myself for giving in to heart wish and then facing the consequences. Never thought he would make me embarrass or is it me who embarrassed without reason? I never analysed not even when I ran from his room and locked myself in my room.


Leaning on the closed door, I panted heavily both by running and his proximity.


I slid down against the closed door when I recalled what happened in his room.










I thought after calling him hubby dear, I can behave normally without letting him know my act. But it backfired me.


Instead of waking up he pulled me on top of him. I gasped when his arm accidentally brush against my bare waist, peeking from the T shirt.


"Good morning wifey dear... What did you just called me?" His sleepy drowsy voice itself not helping me from those insane thoughts. Even though he kept his arms around me gently, I felt melting against him.


"Ar..nav..." I found myself stuttering for the very first time in my life.


"Whh..att?" He mimicked making me embarass more.


He looked down at me with his half drowsy eyes. Gosh, he should be punished for having those drug filled eyes which were pulling me towards him like moth to a flame. His eyes have something that always captivate in his web.


Is it his true love that alluring me? Or


Is he purposely seducing me with those drugged eyes pouring my soul?


"You didn't answer me"


His linger touch behind my ears keeping me away from thinking sane. Along with that his constant gaze at my quivering lips didn't came to rescue.


"I.."


Mustering the scattering parts of my sane mind, I opened my mouth to cover up the mistake and closed it the next minute in shock.


"Our deal is all about me to impress you not the way around wifey... I am already impressed and now you're making it hard for me to stay away from you"


"But I like you this way, wifey dear"


Wait did he pecked my nose or there in philtrum (the small gap between nose and upper lip)


Either way he kissed me and heard my words. God,










The next thing I did was ran away from him.


Once the dead heart, only beats for circulating blood was now galloping against rib cage clearly indicating the new harbouring feelings.


I entwined my own fingers in anxiety and wondered why I started to feel this way as earlier once, he come close to me that day. I never felt like that. Why now??


You started to accept him wholeheartedly including your stupid brain accepted him. He entered your whole system not only in your heart.


A sane part answered me. That was also right. I never felt anything like this for Siddharth. I hardly let him hold me but here I am willingly expecting and anticipating Arnav closeness.


Gradually letting the nervousness to swept away I stretched my lips to curve into a smile. I am not going to lie myself.


I like his proximity. Grinning widely at the realisation I stood up.


How am going to face him now? Oh ****. He'll tease me to death now.


Biting the lower lip, I paced the room trying to reason my behaviour if he ask about it.


Damn it!!


The knock has to come now and following by that his voice.


"Khushi..."


What shall I tell him if he ask about that? I panicked.


"I am going to office. Khushi"


Oh, what office. Shocked by the time which shows 9 a.m. I sprinted outside.


Damn it. Did I measured the length and breadth of my room for three hours.


"Lock the door. Be safe. I will come home for lunch" He behaved normal and I breathed out normally. Uff.. So much for calling him hubby dear.


I followed him to the door. The exact minute he opened the door, the women from opposite flat stood ready to ring the bell.


What she needs now? Didn't I avoided her?


Smiling for courtesy, I turned my head to see Arnav. Is he disturbed? I don't why I found worry lines on his forehead all of sudden.


"Woh.. sorry I think I disturbed you. I just came over to call you for valentine's party" She smiled sweetly. What's her name?, Yeah Nandhini. She doesn't look danger to me atleast now.


"Thank you. But we have some other plans and I am afraid we couldn't attend the party" Arnav answered even before I could deny.


What is it, worry and uneasiness in his voice?





_____


Apr 14

34. Ignorance is bliss (By Spriya) (Thanked: 64 times)

Khushi Pov


I don't know why Arnav got tensed seeing Nandhini. I never seen him getting nervous and uneasiness at all. What had to be the reason?


Pushing aside the thought, I roamed over the house for straight second day. Joining to Job after a week is a bad idea, it seems.


After calling everyone in our family, I dare not to call Arnav. Lest, I'll invite hell of embarrassment. I am sure he would not be fogetten the morning incident.


My mobile dinged indicating a message. Frowning I opened the WhatsApp messenger, these years my equation with social networking sites were not much positive. Only Maya except from family knows my number.


Arnav, a sudden thrill pass down the spine seeing his name. I opened it hurriedly.


'I know my wifey dear is bored.."


Is is a question or statement? What does he want to say?


'So?'


I sent it and waited for reply. But nothing came, like a maniac I waited for his reply checking the mobile time to time.


It never came, but he arrived at night. For the first time, I was so desperate that I passed the whole day wondering about him and his message.


Why didn't he replied me? I even called him two times and he left it to rang itself. What the hell happened to him?


Did by any chance, he's ignoring me? It looks like so. I saw him entering the home without even second glance and a smile he rushed to his room.


I did nothing to anger him. I recalled my day once again, lest by mistake I upset him.


"Arnav coffee" I handed him even before he ask for one.


He looked at me and my hand before snatching it. I couldn't hold back after this.


"Arnav, any problem in office?" I asked turning to him.


He gave the same look like previous one and go on ignoring mode.


Swallowing the bubbling anger, I held his arm turning him to look at me "Arnav I am asking to you"


He pushed my hand away though gently, I was beyond frustrated. First he messaged me, when I expected his reply he simply ignored it and now ignoring me too. What I did that he's behaving this way with me?


He never ignored me when I did not even acknowledged him as my husband and when I did he's ignoring me. He's same as like all men's out there. Trailing behind a puppy until they get their way with the girl and after they achieved they never care.


As soon this thought came in my mind, I felt sick to even stand in the same room.


***


Never he spoke a word nor I approached him after that. Waves! Similar to my life. Started with up and ended before it rejoice it's freedom. I felt the same. I flew high for two days only to drop back with a sting.


Why is he behaving like this???


Stop! I am not going to lament over him, I chanted like a mantra. Albeit hearing warnings from conscious my heart was not ready to accept his ignorance. It stubbornly took me back there, in his thoughts. By this way, I am sure sleep will not be in my night today.


Tossing turning in the bed I closed my eyes only when clock neared past eleven.


Someone is shaking me. Getting difficult on opening my eyes, I closed it back praying the person who's waking me would go to sleep.


"Wifey dear"


I snapped open my eyes. He was ignoring me right, what does he want now.


I looked up and saw Arnav bending down slightly calling me. All my sleep gone away.


"Arnav" I called him eagerly. After long hours, he himself came to me.


"Get up" Saying this he pushed the quilt and taking shawl from my wardrobe. What is he doing now?


Rubbing my eyes, I stood up like he instructed. He came towards me hurriedly and wrapped the shawl around my form. I frowned seeing him dragging me all the way after locking the door.


"Arnav, where are you dragging me?"


"Shh...shh... Hold my hand tight, it's dark" He shushed me dodging the question. I gripped his palms tightly, inching closer to him and almost rubbing his side form while walking. Not that I was afraid of dark, but I love to hold onto him.


When we reached down he showed me a new bike.


"Arnav, yeah?"


"It's ours. I bought it today, do you like it?" Asked he. Even in darkness I can feel his eagerness on knowing my answer.


"Hmm. I love it" I hmmed when I can't actually see the bike. It's dark I couldn't even able to see the colour but how can I disappoint him when he's asking me sweetly and telling me it's ours not his.


"Then what're you waiting for? Sit" Just then I noticed him sitting on the bike and gesturing me to sit back.


Throwing aside my questions I took my seat back.


"It's going to be a long ride Khushi. You can sit by throwing your legs on either side, if you didn't feel uncomfortable" He said glancing back.


Like every girl, I too dreamt of going on bike ride sitting behind my husband. He's fulfilling it now. Wait, that does mean he's trying to impress me. I recalled how he asked the question whether I like bike or car ride. So my hubby dear is working on my likes. My heart fluttered in joy.


Throwing my legs on either side, I put my palms on his shoulders for grip.


"Are you comfortable? Shall I start it?"  


Being gentleman, he asked this question. I couldn't need more. Nodding I sat inhaling his scent and he crossed our vicinity.


The ride was so silent and so pleasant. Chilling air, silent atmosphere under the moon, riding smooth on highways, in my favourite bike and with my hubby. I smiled and it faded when a sudden flash of my past life flickered in my mind.


There was a time I asked or sometimes pleaded Siddharth for bike ride. He will shrug it just like that. He only do what he was interested on.


Not wanting this beautiful journey to turn ugly I pushed aside his thought. But the earlier enthusiasm faded along with that.


I want to enjoy the ride with Arnav. I pouted sadly as I don't know why I lost the interest all of sudden.


Is it because of Siddharth thought? Or is it because Arnav?


Arnav is doing everything for me and here I am sulking over my ex-lover. ****!


All of sudden I was jolted back when my hand was pulled from front. And before I realise my hands circled around his torso and my front was plastered to his back.


"Enjoy the feel wifey. Why are you sulking unnecessarily?"


His voice soothed my sore mood much to my wonder. I inhaled the fresh breezy air and laid my head on his back. Our bike teared the air moving in a speed which put shame to wind. I love this, love this ride, love this Arnav.


"Did you really thought I would ignore you without any reason?" He asked breaking my monotone.


I nodded not wanting to upset him. I now realise, he did that to surprise me. But for what?


"Ignorance is such a bliss, you know?"


I twisted my face. How it will be a bliss?


As if sensing my doubt he answered me "If I didn't ignore you, you would never been so much eager to talk to me and you would never gave me coffee without even asking and surely you would never agree to come with me without confirming about my plans" He chuckled.


'Yes, it was. Else I would never feel the way now I am feeling now' I didn't voiced out but hugged him willingly.


Along with that a guilty conscience creeped in.




____



Thank you so much for all your support on previous chapter ??


Apr 15

35. Trust (By Spriya) (Thanked: 53 times)

Khushi pov


The guilt of judging him without knowing his surprise started to churn my insides. How could I? Whatever things he do, he always keep me on his mind. But here I easily let him down.


"I am sorry" I whispered on his ears.


I crashed against him as he halted the bike instantly.


"Why?" He asked turning back.


"For thinking wrong about you" I whispered ashamed of my own conclusion.


"Then I am afraid, you've to ask many sorry's"


I lowered my eyes knowing how truthful his sentence was. I hurt him a lot earlier. He never even raised his voice against me, unless he's totally pissed off by my behaviour. How sweet he's and how bitter I am!


"Forget the past, we can't change it" He shook his head as if trying to forget the not so happy moments.


Yeah, he's right. Past is past. We can't change but we can change the future.


"Ok now tell me where are you taking me?" I asked diverting the topic.


He smiled "That's surprise"


"Are you trying to impress me Raizada?" I asked breaking the silence fell between us. I don't want him to dwell in my past behaviour. He would get nothing but only hurt.


"Do you feel so?"


Why can't he answer simply?


"Anyone who was asked question will only answer not questions back" I argued.


"Few persons and few situations are exception, you know?"


"Arnav..." I whined on not getting the answer. He easily tricked me and got what he wanted and here I was deprived of that skills could only sulk.


I desperately wanted to know why is he doing this. It's a surprise, not a question about that but I want to hear that from him.


"Chillax wifey, you have no patience to handle a situation"


"You know it, then why are you not telling me. Arnav say na..." I persuaded him.


"Don't tell me you forget about our first valentine's day?"


I bit my tongue. How did this slip out from my mind?


"Ok, enough of our talks. We reached our destination"


I roamed my eyes capturing the surroundings. It was not dark like before. Infront of us there was green lushy mountain. Few birds chirping here and there. But the place doesn't look like it was something special. Why did he took me here then?


I get down from the bike as he joined me after parking the bike.


He streched open his palm infront of me waiting for mine to clasp into his. Without second thought I slipped my palm into his. I was bestowed with his full blown smile as reward.


"This path will not be smooth, hold me tight ok. Walk carefully"


After my nod we started to walk, I kept capturing the surroundings than questioning about his plan.


I put my feet carefully yet few times  stumbled upon him. He like a sweet man, slowed down his pace to accompany me.


We came to halt at a place where we can see both ocean and hills.


"Arnav.. it was mesmerizing" I couldn't help but glee in happiness.


Chuckling, he gently turned my chin towards east where I can see the dawn of sun and fading of moon.


Not so bright red but mix of orange and yellow scattered in a brief distance on clear blue sky with blue water in down, and the non existent end was full of green. What a sight!!! Only violet was left back to present the view of rainbow, quite in different size actually.


"You like it"


I glanced my side to see him standing with his eyes fixated on the alluring view.


"Love it. How do you know this place? Are you familiar with Goa?"


"Hmm. Not actually. I came to Goa few times, and had no time to tour myself. Yesterday I asked about it and came here with one of the helper. Here tower coverage was so less, that's why I couldn't able to attend your calls and mostly unreachable. How do you love this surprise?"


How much sweet can he be?


"Don't be so sweet Arnav, you'll become diabetic" I said in a trance.


He chuckled tapping my nose "I have a strict wife in my home. She'll keep tab on that things, won't she?" He stated confidently yet his voice trailed down in confusion.


"Your wife may not know about cooking and all, but she can keep tab on these things. Don't worry Mr." I assured him. The change I am showing and developing lately was not just by words but my true feelings.


He turned his gaze back to the view.


"I love hills and you beach. So I thought this place would be perfect start for us" He said startling me.


He love hills, and choose this place to show our union. How thoughtful!!!


I throw my arms around his neck and entwined at his nape, probably for the very first time.


"Thank you so much Arnav!"


He stilled in his place and I was not a fool to realise why is so. Hiding my smile that was threatening to come out, I released my entwined hands and took a step back.


"Arnav, I want to go there" I pointed at the sea s**** to bring him back from his shock.


Flashing a grin, he took hold of my hands and started taking me down there.


Squealing like a kid I ran towards the water following by Arnav who dare not to let me alone. It's been years, I visited beach let alone I played in it.


.

.

.


"Khushi" Shrieked he when I splashed little water. He probably didn't expect that.


He splashed in return that almost wet my whole form.


"Arnav this is not fair. See I only splashed little, you didn't even got wet. But what do you did now?" I made a crying face showing my wet form.


"Is it ok now?" I open my eyes wide in shock. Hell, he fell in the water and got himself wet from head to toe.


"Arnav, what are you doing?" I scolded him when he stood coolly with water dripping from head to toe.


Hopping near him I wiped his face with my wet shawl.


"You'll catch cold" I wiped his hair.


I gasped when he snatched the shawl in his hand "You'll also catch cold" said in a concerned voice he rubbed wiping my hairs.


He was so close that I can inhale his scent. It was intoxicating and the heat emitting from his body keeping my shivering form at bay.


Gawking him like a alien landed in earth, I didn't realise he too stopped his actions and continue to gawk at me.


Until a hot breath fell on my neck, I didn't realise his actions. My breath caught in throat anticipating his next move. I hissed and clutched his arm which was around my waist, when a soft hot thing touch my skin down the throat. It continues to lurk there until my brain registered that thing was his lips.


As soon as my brain passes the message to all the neurons it alerted my each and every cell. I felt goosebumps erupting over my skin. All the hairs stood straight in anticipation. I found myself heaving when his lips travel around a while. The raise and down on my chest was matching his.


He looked up as I shuddered when his hot breath tickled my nerves just above my heart where my T-shirt clung to my skin showing it's exact neckline.


I frowned next instant when he enclosed me with my wet shawl. I saw him covering me sincerely and then place a peck on my forehead.


"Come, I booked our rooms nearby. We can change ourselves into another set of clothes there"


How could he state everything calmly when I still feel his lips under my throat. Clutching the shawl close to my heart, I enclosed my right palm with his.


The walk seems calm and ackward atleast to me. Berating myself to tear the silence, I asked what nagged me yesterday.


"Arnav, do you know Nandhini? The opposite flat lady. You seems tensed when she invited us to her party"


As soon as I asked this, he stopped walking. Turning my side his right hand palmed my cheeks "If I say, staying away from her was only for our own good. Will you trust me without any second thought?"


My brain failed to understand the situation. I fumbled to answer him, why is he saying this? Is there any harm around that lady? But how could Arnav know her. Will she be his friend? But it didn't seem so. Nandhini didn't showed as if she know Arnav. I too don't know her.


"It's ok. I understand" I was broke out from my monologue when I heard his displeased voice.


"Arnav.. I..."


"It's ok Khushi. I understand. Come it's getting late"


That was the last sentence he spoke in an hour travel. I tried to start conversation, but he didn't even respond it. ****! I upset him.


"Khushi, we reached"


I step down and followed him losing the interest of sight seeing and his surprises.


"Arnav Singh Raizada" I stood beside him when he spoke to the receptionist.


All of sudden I felt chillness. Clutching the jacket I pulled it more. I looked down as the jacket smells him. Seeing my shivering form during the travel, he gave me his jacket. I smiled at his concern.


"Room number- 713, 714"


I looked at him shocked when he got two keys. He booked two rooms even here, keeping my comfortableness in mind.


I don't know what came over me as I strode towards him. Restraining him from walking further I pulled his arm.


"One room is enough. I TRUST YOU"  


I clearly know what those words meant for. He throws a grateful smile as understanding the underlying meaning.


Nandhini or not, I trust him!








_____



Apr 16

36. Companionship (By Spriya) (Thanked: 57 times)

Khushi POV


Drying the shawl, I looked around the room. It was spacious enough to accommodate more than two people.  Seven star hotel, may be.


"Khushi here's your dress" He handed me a packet. I took it and eyed him questioningly. From where did he buy this dress at early morning.  


As if understanding my question he replied "I got our dress packed yesterday"


Not knowing how to extend the conversation I grabbed the dress and towel.


Slipping into the given tops and jeans, I left the washroom only to gulp at the sight before me.


There in the middle of the room stood he showing his back with his shirt off drying his hair. The water dripped down trailing from his hair, down the spine ever slowly and got solace under his trousers.


What the hell, am I thinking? I mentally slapped myself for giving images to my sinful thoughts.


"Er... Arnav you can take bath now" I cleared my throat purposely only to stop my scandalized thoughts.


He nodded disappearing into the washroom and I exhaled my breath.


As we got ready ourselves, we came downstairs for breakfast. As usual he asked about my preference of having breakfast down in dining area or on our room itself. Sometimes I fear about my capability of loving him. How much he care for me and loving me! How am I going to repay him?


Willingly entwining my fingers with him, I held his arm gently by my another hand.


Like always a lovely man, he pulled out a chair for me. Settling opposite to me he go through the menu card and give another one to me.


After ordering it, we sat in silence and I was taken aback by his stare. His gaze piercing my soul. I wiggled on my place.


"Er.. Arnav you still didn't told me about what happened five years back"  I questioned mentally patted myself for coming with this topic.


He smiled and his smile reached his eyes glowing more than normal.


"It was five years back" He whispered with a sigh.


I found myself excited to hear and moved little forward sitting at the edge of the chair.


Palming my jaws I perked up my ears eyeing him to continue.


"So eager are we?" Asked he.


When I nodded in reflex he tapped my nose.


"It was the time when I joined AR and started to work. Dad strictly denied to give me a top designation unless I prove my abilities. So in earlier times he personally assigned my tasks which was not at all to be worked sitting in a air conditioned cabin. I used to travel a lot. Like once I was called by a university for guest lecture. I used to give lectures back. So it was not at all a surprise thing" he chuckled and stopped telling as our food arrived.


I held his hand from picking the fork.


"What?"


"Finish what you started" I demanded having zero patience.


"Are you serious? Khushi eat first, I am not going anywhere and you too"


"No.. you said this other day too but didn't told me. Now I want to know else I'll not eat" I declared stubbornly slightly moving back in the chair.


He looked at me amused and I had hard time in controlling my smile.


"Are you a kid wifey? Seriously. I couldn't believe it. For this small matter you're acting childish. And as far as I remember the day before yesterday someone advised me not to behave childish" He raised his brows.


I am sure he's trying to dodge the topic. I sat stubborn not to touch the food.


"Khushi eat"


He sighed defeated "It was not at all catchy story Khushi. I just saw you at the University and were mesmerized by the way you behaved with others. I thought it was attraction and tried to forget you. But your face kept haunting me. I never believed love in first sight then. But after days passing, I couldn't erase you from my thoughts. I convinced myself it was just a attraction. Your images would pop up in my mind now and then. I shrugged it all under the name of infatuation. But it hit me hard when mom started my marriage talks and look out for a girl. I denied to see any girls only then I came to know about my feelings. Then I started searching for you and it did take time inbetween my heavy schedule. When I found out, your family was finding alliance for you. Without delay I send my family to speak with your parents. And when I saw after years you're not at all same. Instantly I know something was wrong but couldn't find out what. Not wanting you to dwell in your worries I opted for quick marriage. After that you know everything" He shrugged coolly explaining his five years in just a second.


Here I am confusing just from past months but he.. five years. Dammit. How hard it could be! Top of it I hurt him a lot.


"Arnav. Why didn't you confide this with me at earlier? Maybe it could've saved us from going through the tough phase" Said I cursing the time we wasted.


"You're not in the state to hear anything Khushi"


I sighed lowering my head. Hadn't I shut him up when everytime he approached me to have a talk? How mercilessly I denied his friendship proposal? How outrageously I pushed him away when he try to cope with my mood swings?


Uff...


I was snapped up when a thing touched my lips. Bend down, I saw him stretching a spoon of morsel infront of my lips waiting for me to apart it.


Letting him feed me, I sat analysing his each and every expression. His face was calm like always but now a new glow added to it. His eyes twinkled in joy. He was so sincere even in taking the morsel and his gaze was fixed only from plate to my lips.


How he looks composed always? What magic is behind that? How can he handle everything with patience? Hell, how did he hid his feelings since past years? And even after marriage? How hurt he must felt when I didn't even treat him as a human. Holy ****!







In no way, I will be equal to him. But he was more than equal to me.


In no way, I will be the missing part of his life. But he's the missing part of my life.


In no way, I will be a perfect partner for him. But he's the best partner I could ever imagine.


In no way, I will be a good friend to him. But he was always a friend which we never voiced out openly.


In no way, I will keep him everything above my priorities. But for him, I was...









My own thoughts choked me to breath. How could I ever dare to hurt him? I want to scream. I want to cry out loud. The scream which my heart wished was ready to spill out from my mouth. It weighted my heart and throat simultaneously. I cupped my mouth to swallow it. I can't embarass him amidst of fifty people. I can't hurt him... I can't... My eyes blurred with rain of tears. Where's Arnav? I looked at my opposite to see it empty. Where's he? Arnav... Arnav... Did he left me? Is he fed up of my behaviour? Oh god.. Where's he? Arnav... Panic rushed through my veins. I shuddered.


"Khushi.. Khushi.. what happened? Why are you crying dammit?" I snapped my head at the voice and shocked finding Arnav beside me.


"Arnav" I whispered brokenly.


Next instant I was on his arms. He throws his arm around my frame crushing me into his. I clutched his shoulder and laid my head on his chest wetting his shirt.


"Khushi. What happened? Did I said anything wrong?" He asked worriedly.


More tears rolled down by his question. He thinks he hurt me, how can he. How can he think like that? He never hurt me! I vigorously shook my head as no, lest I'll upset him.


"Then why are you crying now?" Asked he rubbing my back.


"Nothing"


"Shh.. Don't lie, ok. I can see what nothing it was. You said, you trust me. Won't you tell me?" Tears stopped as he rubbed soothing circles on my arms.


"Don't you think we already stepped into friendship zone? Won't you share it with your friend?"


I looked up coming out of the hug.


"Trust me it's nothing. I... Just insecurities. I fear... Arnav what if one day you fed up of me?" I sound myself as a vulnerable child.


He cupped my cheeks wiping the tears "Never. I'll never fed up of you. Love does not come with only happiness Khushi. One should accept their love with all their flaws, that's the true love. I, accepted you knowing you very well. Throw your insecurities away. It do nothing but restrict you from approaching me. You can share anything with me if not as husband at least as a friend. You got it?"


I found myself smiling and nodding to him.


Once again he proved himself as a good husband!








_______


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