Dark FF- Elitists *completed*

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Dec 18

Elitists next part is up (By Farakhan) (Thanked: 37 times)


                                                 "Wine and Kisses"

“Let me sleep!” I hiss pulling the quilt over my head. I hear him laugh softly.

“We don’t want to spend our honeymoon sleeping!” I open my eyes and realize what he said a moment ago and sat up straight.

“You didn’t tell me it was a honeymoon!” I almost yell at him and he smirks, evilly.

“Now you know!”

“But you should’ve told me!” I argue frustrated.  

“Oh sorry for not hanging a poster on the wall and advertising it on my plane for you to look and know it’s a honeymoon.” I sigh.

“I…you should have told me…” he groans.

“its just some holidays, happy now?”

“No…I am on my…periods” my cheeks burn as I say this and I drop my head above my knees. I hear him laugh and close my eyes wishing to become invisible. I feel his breaths on my cheek followed by a long, lingering kiss. I look up in his eyes and smile a little.

“How can you girls hide such things? I swear I never know when my sisters are you know in this phase.” I roll my eyes.

“’Cause you men are too dumb to notice **** about women.” He laughs again making me breath sharply. He’s affecting me like a virus. My body isn’t mine anymore. Its like he has a magnetic field set around himself to trap me. Our eyes meet and he nods his head as if agreeing with what I said. He moves closer until our breaths are mingling and then we kiss for a good minute or so. I break the kiss but he doesn’t move away instead caresses my skin under my eyes. I look at him transfixed.  

“Jaan-e-man,” he begins, “is it wrong that I wanna bury myself in you?”

I take deep breaths as if to calm my emotions. Yes, I feel overwhelmed. I feel proud. I am loved by a man who otherwise is known to hate. Right now, I feel like I can rule him. I have his heart in my palm. He fears me. He bites his lip softly, nervously.  

“I dunno.” He looks at me with his molten brown eyes full of love and devotion similar that I saw all my life in another pair of hazal eyes. It makes me sad. I feel tears welling up in my eyes. I blink twice to prevent tears from falling. A tear falls on his thumb that was caressing my skin just now.

“Why are crying? Hush…” he hugs me and hides my face in his chest. I cry.

I don’t say anything. I have nothing to say. I move away from him after few minutes and wipe my face. He stares at me dumbfounded probably thinking I’m crazy.   

“I’ll freshen up!” he nods without questioning further for which I’m very thankful.

I stand under hot shower, letting the water run over my skin. The steam calming my senses bringing a sense of peace and calm. I feel tired so I sit down and close my eyes feeling water hit my head and shoulders. The knock on the door makes me realize I must have been here for a long time now. I turn off the shower and wipe my hairs and body with the very soft towels. I dress up and join him for breakfast.

He smiles at me warmly as I sit beside him on the settee. The coffee table in front of us is laden with different dishes, all of them traditional and it makes me smile at his thoughtfulness.  

I start eating and gesture him to do the same but he just stares at me.

“Arnav…eat!” he nods his head and starts eating. I shook my head at how colorful his personality is.

We eat in silence and a waitress comes to collect the rest of stuff and empty dishes.

“The food was delicious.” I say, “Thanks!”

“Never mind!” he says pulling me closer with his arm around my waist. He kisses my temple multiple times making me giggle. I feel like I am a tiny girl being pampered by her Papa. His eyes hold for me the same warmness I had felt long ago in my father’s eyes; the same warmness I felt in Zayn’s eyes every time I’d cry and he’d hold me in his arms; the same warmness babuji had in his eyes on the day of marriage.

“Don’t look at me like that.” I mumble softly.


“I think I understand what it means,” I say looking at his handsome face, “And I feel overwhelmed.”

“But I want to look at you.”

“Stop or I will cry on our honeymoon!” this distracts him and he smirks, rising his eyebrow, he nears his face to mine and kisses the corner of my mouth. My hairs still wet and disheveled.

“Poor! We can’t have ****.” I roll my eyes.

“You always have it on your mind, don’t you?” he fakes an innocent-shocked look.

“How do you know what’s it like inside my head? Are you a witch or psychic?”

“A witch!” I giggle “I’ve given you the powerful love potion!” he grins.

“I reckon so!” he agrees and we both laugh at our silliness.

Later we cuddled each other for hours, doing nothing but chatting and kissing and [me specifically] blushing.

In the evening, we roamed in the streets of colorful city and shopped so many things and visited the orphanages AR supported.

And Arnav took me to a very fancy hotel with golden walls and big chandeliers lighted with what looked like candles but were fairy lights; with archaic and modern art pieces hung on the walls as if everyone there understood their beauty and messages and the chairs and tables made of oak tree wood and were of natural color with a fresh flower pot and two glasses and a fine wine bottle on each table, empty or taken.

I stood there mesmerized.

Arnav takes me to a table in the far corner.

“Do you like this place?”

“I love it!” I say looking at the art pieces, Zayn would’ve been so glad to be here but—what am I thinking? I frown and shook my head a little to clear it off his thoughts. I try to focus on Arnav as he asks something like, “want some wine?” and I nod without fully understanding what he said.

I hold the wine glass and look at him unsure but seeing him taking a gulp from his glass makes me want to drink this strange thing. I take a sip and moan softly. Its so smooth and fine and fruity.

“Its so…smooth!” I gasp and he agrees. “What is it?”

“What do you think it is?”

“Something like juice or what…its too strong to be taken as juice though.” I purse my lip and he smiles.

“It wine.” I look at him alarmed.

“This must be expensive,” then I suddenly notice that our bottle is different from every other on the table. “Tell me about it!” I say interestingly.

“Screaming Eagles, most expensive and hard to find wine in the world. I acquired this in a charity event in NYC.”

“How much did you pay for it?” I ask very much absorbed in the liquid in my hand. I sip it slowly.

“I don’t remember.”


“Jaan-e-man,” I blush and he continues, “It was Aman who sat in auction and brought it. It was before your accident. I wanted us to drink it on our wedding night but well…you know I wasn’t sure about how you’ll react so…I waited…” he shrugs.  

“It’s the best thing I’ve ever drink.” I confess and his face lit with a smile as if he has been waiting for me to say that all the while. “Can I drink more?”

“Its all yours, Jaan-e-man.”

“Stop calling me that!”

“Why?” he raises his eyebrow, still smiling.

“It causes acidity in my stomach!” I lie and he laughs. His face brightening up making me bewitched. He keeps on laughing and I stare at his face in trance. The waiter breaks in our lovely moment making me blush and Arnav angry.

“Khushi, jaan-e-man, are you hungry or should we wait?”

Eat!” I say as I feel my stomach grumbling.

“Choose what you want then.” He says focusing on his menu.

“I’ve no idea about what so ever are these dishes!” I whisper urgently.

“Don’t worry, they are all Indian but they chose to name them in English…for value addition!” I sigh and choose two dishes with my fingers crossed and Arnav’s reassurance that food here is always good.


After waiter left, I turn to Arnav, “tell me…” I hesitate for a moment but decide to take the risk, “about yourself…I mean your childhood, parents…yeah…about you.

He looks at me as if caught off-guard by my sudden inquiry but I’ve been planning this since our wedding night. I want to know him and all those factors that make him who he is.

“I’m Arnav and-“ just then his phone rang. He apologizes and attends the call. I don’t know what the other person says but I witness him transforming from soft and loving Arnav to ruthless ASR. His face stays handsome but turns ruthless in expression making me clutch the table tightly. I feel anxiety rising in me suffocating me. Why was he looking so mad? Would he hurt me? 


good night. im tired and please comment! i need your feedback! 

thank you for supporting me always :*

Jan 12

Elitists next part is up (By Farakhan) (Thanked: 27 times)

Chapter# 37

                                       "Date Night"

I look at her anxious and scared face.

“What is it?” she asks and I shrug.

“Nothing,” I lie, “Nothing to bother for six days, I’m keeping my promise.” she smiles and relief washes over her face. I turn off my phone and look at her pretty face. All these art pieces to admire but her smile is the only worthy piece of art here. I don't even want to start admiring rest of her body.

“Do you remember your parents?” I ask her trying to kick start a conversation because its really awkward here. The waiter arrives with the food and khushi began inquiring him about food and thanks when he is gone.

“What were saying?” she asks stuffing her mouth with food.

“Do you remember your parents?”

“Yeah...they are a part of me. Obviously I remember.” she rolls her eyes as if finding my question silly.

“Silly question it was though!” i laugh awkwardly.

“You were…” she clears her throat, “gonna tell me about yourself.”

“Yeah.” i smile at her and reply, “My parents are dead khushi, both real and unreal-”

“-What? I don’t understand.” she asks puzzled by my brief introduction.

“Real one died when I was seventeen and when I turned 20, fake one died too!”

“Arnav!” she GIGGLES, “Are you kidding me? If yes then you are funny!”

I stare at her and smile, “Unbelievable! You think it's unbelievable?”

“No!” she says soberly, “Not if it's related to you. I’m all ears make me understand!”

“My father was a prick. He loved Aliya-”

“-Your mother?”

“Not my real one if you would be patient enough to hear.”

“Yes I’m all ear!” she says stuffing her mouth with spoon full of rice.

“My father didn’t love my mother so when I was born, he left her and I began living with him and Aliya.” I half-heartedly tell her my half-accurate history.

“How old were you then?” I wet my lips.

“I was a day old.”

“What?” the spoon slips from her fingers and she stares at me with surprise and confusion.

“I was a day old.” I repeat sternly and she nods her head a bit taken aback by my changed tone.   

“I’m just-”



“Well he dumped my mother and 2 years before they died, I was informed that I’ve a mother and Aliya was just another woman not my mom.”

“It must be a terrible experience!”

“Yeah...It taught me not to trust or love or care or forgive!”

“I hope you’ll find your part of happiness.” i smile. Look at this angel. Her smile. Her words. Her hopes. Her wishes. Everything is pure and yet they ask me why i love this woman. They say what is so special about her. Tell them to see her through my eyes.

“Let’s leave, if you are done eating!”

“Can we walk to hotel?”

“Sure.” I smile. Today i can even give my life for her. I’m so much in love with her. We start walking out of hotel. I tell driver to leave without us. Hand in hand, we walk slowly and the night air hit our skins. She smiles looking around.

“So tell me about you.” I ask with a hint of nervousness. I have no idea why I’m nervous. Probably because that good for nothing Zayn was a part of her life and she would began thinking about him and all.

“Let me tell you what in your words “beggars gupta” mean to me!” I roll my eyes.

“Seriously? I thought you would tell me about your real parents.” she smiles.

“Arnav,” I look at her attentively, “when my parents died and I was abandoned by all those who I thought were my family just yesterday, I was too young to understand the situation but I remember their cold stares. I remember the emptiness that crept in my bones like a virus sucking up love of my mother and leaving me empty and hollow and hopeless. Then I thought love was impossible and whatever I had, would never return. But it did. Now I know, you hate my parents but they are hope in my life that no amount of money can buy. After my parents, I love them.” she glance down and looks up again. “So it hurts me when they are hurt. Because they are a part of me!”

“I understand.” I nod my head.

“No you don’t.”

“I do.”

“What do you understand?”

“That they are your hope like you’re mine.” I confess and she laughs softly.

“You surprise me so much.” she makes a confused face and I smile looking around and back at her.

“You know,” I start, “You are the only person worthwhile in my life. When I’m with you, I am a better man and When I’m without you, I’m worst man. I don’t hate your parents or zayn. I just hate the fact that they take a fraction of your mind, the part should be mine. *misty eyes* I love you so much that the thought of sharing your thoughts with someone makes me jealous and you don’t know jealousy, khushi it is the worst kind of feeling.”

“Oh Arnav! I told you, you surprise me so much!” she wipes the corner of her eyes and laughs.

“When I first saw you, that day when you came to clean my room. Do you remember that? That was the day I fell in love with you!” she nods.

“That was the day I started hating you!”

I remember that day very well.  

“I was nice to you though.”

“Depends on how you define ‘niceness’”

“That was the nicest I’ve been with a stranger especially a worker!”

"You offered me charity! I'm still offended."

"it wasn't charity! I was really impressed. I was afraid you would hurt yourself but you worked like a pro, the way you were moving so fast and all. And your eyes, they were shining with fierce glimpse. I never saw that in anyone before." 

"You threatened to kill me!" 

"For my defense, I was just testing you!" she laughs.

"Your defense is poor Mr. Raizada."

i raise my hand in surrender and she giggles. we reach the hotel and once inside, exhausted we fell asleep.


2 years ago, flashbacks.


January, 20, 2015

Zayn’s house

“I’m nervous,” khushi told Zayn with her hand on her heart.

“You can do it! Darling if you don’t like it, you can think about working in my office. Just don’t take pressure.” she nodded her head and tried to smile. “Today is Tuesday and are you ready for 10th episode of The Flash?” he winked at her trying to lighten her mood.

Khushi squealed in excitement “Ohhh ohhh I forgot it completely! Do you think the fire man is Ronnie?”

“I think he is but you know in comics Firestorm is a merge of two man: Professor Stein and Ronnie. Let’s see what they do here.”

“I wish he would be Ronnie. Poor Cat deserves love!”

“So do you, my dear Khush! Don’t bully yourself over things you can’t control. Remember I love you!”

“There is no khushi without Zayn.”

“Give me a kiss then!” he placed his lips on hers and kissed her briefly before they were interrupted by knock on the door.

“Time to part, my love.” he kissed her forehead and they both went to open the door to Find Garima. They bid her goodbye and headed for their respective places.

Raizada Mansion

“Di please do me a favor stop hiring stupid servants!” Anjali rolled her eyes.

“Did you fire that girl?”

“Yeah AND don’t ask me why.” his temper seemed to have lost its balance.

“Anyway, there will be a new maid but Arnav if you scare her away, You’ll have to find your own maid. I will leave you on your own! I’m gonna hang out with my friends today, don’t bother calling me.”


“Bye and if this girl is as dumb as the other one you’ll find a nice one or I’ll ruin your kitty party gladly Di!” he shouted and his sister shook her head muttering ‘unbelievable’.

First day at work and khushi made all the house servants her friends. They laughed at jokes and admired her down-to-earth and mellow temper.

“I’ve cleaned all the rooms, do I have to clean this living room too?” Khushi asked a strange aunty who thinks her makeup is on the point when actually she looked like a clown.

“Did you clean ASR’s room?” she asked suspiciously

“Who is he?”

“Owner of the house.”

“Ohh...I um where is his room?”

“Upstairs third floor is all his.” khushi nodded nervously. “After that you can leave.” khushi smiled. Her motivation to work was leaving the work early.

Khushi went upstairs, sitting room was a mess so she began cleaning it up. After thirty minutes of hard work, she moved from room to room, all were quiet and clean except one so she went in and looked around with horrified expression: the clothes lying everywhere; pieces of glass scattered here and there; drawers sliding out; the bed was a mess and the breakfast tray was still there on the nightstands with juice spilling on the floor.

She took a deep breath, started walking towards bed when she heard muffle noises coming from somewhere right to her. She got scared. Taking baby steps she reached the bed and started by picking stuff like bottles of beers. Who keeps these on bed? She wondered. She changed the sheets and arranged the cushions. She turned to nightstands, cleaned them and then she began picking stuff up from the floor, the voices coming from the same place constantly.

“Aww ASR” she heard a loud moan and felt life leaving her legs. Were they having-? Oh no! Could she become invisible? She started cleaning hastily. She has to leave before they see her. But when she arranging clothes back in the wardrobe she heard voices more vividly as if someone was just behind her, scared, she turned around and Khushi gasped at the sight: two people were making out vigorously.

They turned to see the intruder and khushi placed a hand on her eyes.

“And who the f**K are you?” a male voice asked her harshly and when she stayed silent he barked, “Answer me dammit.”

“She is the new maid ASR.” she heard lazy voice of a woman.

Khushi took deep breaths and pulled her arm by her side and looked at them, both wrapped in bathrobe.

“Another stupid maid!” she heard the man gritting his teeth.

“Excuse me?” she was angry this time. How dare he call her stupid?

“No you excuse us and leave,” the woman beside him said impatiently.

“As if anyone would like to stay in this marvelous room! I’ll clean this mess and leave,” khushi said looking around half-cleaned room.

“Are you insulting me?”

“No. I’m stating facts.” she smiled but it faded when the guy started walking toward her. She took a deep breath and decided act to act confident. Just pretend khushi! Her inner voice encouraged.

“Who hired you?”

“None of your business, sir. Can i continue my work and leave?”

“No you can’t leave unless you answer all of my questions.”

Khushi looked at the woman but she gave her look like deal-with-it. She looked back at the man, who was few feet away from her, with her brows raised.

“Who are you?” his first question.

“New maid.” khushi tucked her virtual locks behind her ears nervously.

“Do you know your limits then?”


“-You miss...your name?”


“I’ll cut your throat and throw it in the gutter. Do you want that?” khushi visibly shivered and would have cried if it wasn’t for her pride.

“You can’t scare me like that.”

“Oh I just saw you shiver.”


“-Shut up!” he closed the distance and spat angrily, “Get to work before I really kill you.”

Khushi turned her back to him and felt tears blinding her vision. She wiped her eyes and started doing her job. The woman left his room soon after that.

Arnav watched her work so fast that he feared she would fall and get hurt or may break something but she didn’t. She didn’t look at him even when he wanted her to.   

“What’s your age?” he asked sipping his coffee.

“I refuse to talk to an arrogant man like you.” he smiled.

And when he work was done and she was about to leave he handed her a paper or more precisely a check.

“Name your tip, I like your work.”

She handed the check back to him, “I’ll get my salary, don’t need your charity!” she left in a swift before he could say or offer more.


long update. i need your comments thanks! and also would you like more flashbacks?

Feb 2

ElitistsChap#38 "Choosing Sides" (By Farakhan) (Thanked: 25 times)

Chapter# 38

                                                 "Choosing Sides"

I've been here before

But always hit the floor

Lavanya’s POV

“Wake up love!!” I groan.

“No, I wanna sleep!” he nuzzles my hairs and neck making me smile.

“Zayn sto-”

“Lavanya, meri bachi!” I stare at my maami a bit angrily. He was here even if it was just a dream.


“Shhh! He is here!” i furrow my brows.


“Your good for nothing husband.” mami adds ‘hello-hi-bye-bye’ with a glare at zayn who has already taken the pain to walk inside. I swallow the lump in my throat. I refuse to cry. Nope. don’t cry! Not in front of him. Be strong! I tell myself.

“Can we have a moment alone.” Mami leaves not because of his request but my steely gaze.

“Sit down!” I say once mami is gone, standing up, I try to fix my hair.

“Lavanya...:” he begins earnestly “Sit down and you’ll answer every question honestly.” his face is expressionless and hard. After that night three days ago, he has changed not physically. No. he is as handsome as ever but it’s as if all the emotions, anger and including hatred has left him. He is calm and hard. He calmly told me to leave his house. He calmly handled my sister’s anger. And now he is calm as f*ke. And it scares the **** out of me.

I sit down, trying hard not to break down. I press my lips together and look up at him through my lashes.

“Why did you do that?”

“I’m sorr-””

“That’s not the answer to my question!” I close my eyes, his voice isn’t his. Its not him.

“I…” I meet his eyes, “I read your diary.” still calm. No line of anger or hatred or even disgust.

“What if I did that to you?” i look at my hands in my lap unable to meet his eyes.

“You would never do that!”

“You don’t know me.”

“No, you don’t know me!” I say moving my gaze from my shivering hands to his face.

“That’s not the answer I’m looking for.”

“I would hate you forever.” I confess and finally unable to stop my tears, I hid my face in my hands.   

I've spent a lifetime running

And I always get away

But with you I'm feeling something

That makes me want to stay

“I’ve decided.” I wipe my face and look at him again.

“I’m divorcing you!” he says and leaves. That’s it, my world is shattered into pieces just like  when supersonic plane flies too close a glass window and it shatters into infinite number of tiny pieces which no one can ever put together. I feel like someone just stabbed me several time in my chest leaving holes there and it f*king hurts! I hid my face in my hands feeling life leaving my body. I feel numb and tired. The small dot of dizziness shows up enlarging every second leaving me numb and tired in darkness. And I find myself in the very abbey of darkness I’ve always ran away from.

How do I live? How do I breathe?

When you're not here I'm suffocating

I want to feel love run through my blood

Tell me is this where I give it all up?

For you I have to risk it all




My phone rings and I groan. I should have turned it off yesterday. Seeing my sister’s name, i sit straight but carefully not to disturb khushi. I creep out of bed and call her back.

“What is it-?” I am cut mid air by my brother in law.


“What happened to her?”

“What we all feared…” i hear him sigh and bile rises up in my throat. Nope. my baby sister isn’t suffering. No.

“Where are you?” I ask trying to clear my head off bad thoughts. She is alright. She is just a bit emotional. Nothing

“City hospital. Nervous breakdown.” my heart sank in my stomach.

“I’ll be there.”


I cut the call and face khushi who is awake and gazing at me with quizzical expression.

“I’m leaving for delhi.”

“What do you mean by ‘you're leaving for Delhi?”

“You’ll enjoy your holiday and come back.” i say coolly. She looks thoughtful so i continue, “There will be guide and everything available here. I’m going. Now.” she stares at me but doesn’t say anything.

“Is it about zayn?”

“Nope.” i lie through my teeth.

“Then why are you leaving?”

“I thought you’d be happy.”


“-Khushi, isn’t it a.great thing? You hate me anyway.” something flashes in her eyes but I’ve never been emotionally intelligent person to read eyes. Especially of a woman you love and you hate at the same time.

“You’re lying to me.”

“I’m not answerable to you!”  i grit my teeth.

“Then…” she hesitates, “What was last night?”

“Nothing. Full stop.” and with that I leave the room afraid she will overcome my senses again and tame this beast inside me.

Wasn’t it all easy when i hated women and all relationships were without any strings attached? I didn’t have to run away. I didn’t have to hate and love and get confused with both of them. I was free.

And khushi...she cages me with one glance of hers. But now, I have to choose sides, for my sister’s happiness. And for my own hatred. I choose my darling baby sister. She won’t loose Zayn. when her mother had died, I made a promise to protect everything she held dear. He would protect them so she won’t spend a day suffering. All my bitter past with its secrets was forgotten with her one smile. I will return that smile, even if cost is heavier than benefits. That’s how i make decisions in company. And i will bear the costs s long as due benefits are delivered.

Zayn. I will make sure you regret hurting her.

A million shards of glass

That haunt me from my past

As the stars begin to gather

And the light begins to fade

When all hope begins to shatter

Know that I won't be afraid

After one hour, outside in hotel parking


“What?” I ask irritated, I’m getting late.

“I’m coming with you.” she says firmly and I’ve no energy or time to argue so i shrug carelessly.

So on this beautiful sunny morning in pretty colorful city, I traveled in complete silence with this remarkable beautiful soul whom I refused to let in. for good or bad, only time can answer.  

what will be their future?


go back and review the prologue. ASR is coming!

Am I the only one who ships (secretly) Zayn with Lavanya? 


So sorry for the late and short update :( gotta confess, I was busy watching Supergirl series. I'll update BP soon!

Feb 4

Elitists next part "Not Today" is up (By Farakhan) (Thanked: 20 times)


                                                    "Not Today"

There she goes in front of me

Take my life and set me free again

We'll make a memory out of it

Holy road is at my back

Don't look on, take me back again

We'll make a memory out of it

Khushi’s POV

A whole day of not seeing him and knowing he isn’t the same person anymore, stresses me. Shouldn’t we talk this out like two normal human? I don’t think he realizes I’m a human so I have no expectations of him being gentle or communicative. He made it clear earlier this morning, didn’t he? With his, “Forget when I said I love you. I don’t.”

He is some kind of shape shifting robot switching roles of different persons according to his circumstances without giving a f*k about others feelings. Why should he? I chose to hope, its my fault. I was smitten by him but not anymore. I’m wide awake now.

I grab my phone and dial bua ji’s number. Amma picks up.

“Hello! Amma….can you go and call Zayn? I wanna talk to him!...No, no...I’m fine. No please just call him. It's very important!” I sigh in relief when she agrees to call him after a minute or so, I hear his anxious voice.

“Khushi, you alright?”

“Yes! I’m perfectly fine and healthy.” I try to sound as cheerful as possible without sounding fake. “I am worried about you!” I confess biting my lip.

“Don’t be! Im fine!”

“What happened between you and Lavanya?”

“It’s a long story.”

“I’ve time.”

“Khushi…” he hesitates, “she raped me!”

“WHAAT?” I jerk up from my half-lying posture in shock and anger. And then in a second  feel guilt overpowering every other emotion. And love and sympathy for the man I love dearly.


“I’m sorry...its all because of me...you…” I sob unable to control my emotions.

“Khushi..its not your fault...listen…”

“No...you listen to me!” I wipe my tears and clear my throat, “You can't take that woman back.”

“I’m not,” he assures me.

“Not even if ASR blackmails you using me?”

“He won’t do that. He loves you!” I sigh. If only zayn knew how hard and capricious ASR is.

“Zayn, promise me you’ll not sacrifice for me anymore. You will go away and hunt happiness and love that I couldn’t give you. the kind of love this city, this place can’t give you!”


“Zayn! Remember when you said I am make of titanium and that I can fight my own battles? Trust me, I can! I and only I can handle him. He is mine to take care of. not yours. I need you to live happy.”

“I...yea...I...Okay I understand.” I hear him sigh.

“Have a good night!”

“Yeah...you too!”

“I love you.” he stays silent so I cut the call.

I’m keep my phone on the nightstand, grab my “Nirmela” and resume reading from page 40, feeling relaxed a bit. Talking to zayn is a therapy itself. It feels good. I wish I could have this kind of connection with Arnav. I wish he wasn’t so closed off. So capricious. So impenetrable.

No, no I’m not being harsh. He is closed off. He has ignored by messages and left my calls unattended. He refused to talk to me in the plane and after we were in RM, he frankly told me to shut up and not say a word.

I just hate him.

‘No you don’t,’ my inner voice warns me.

No i don’t hate him.

I don’t.

And it’s painful.  

As I try to concentrate more on the script than my thoughts, the door creaks open and I know it’s him.

My heart beat rises to abnormally high rate and my hands shiver. I feel scared. I am scared. Scared of rejection more than any other thing.

“Did you call your parents?” i frown and stand up to face him throwing my book somewhere on the bed.

“Are you spying me?” I demand facing him.

“That’s not the answer I want.” he says coolly.

“Get out, I don’t want to see you.” I say and as I turn my back on him to resume my previous task of reading, he grabs my wrist tightly and pulls me to his chest. I winced, his hold is tight.  

“You’ll answer my question.” he rasps

“I won’t.” I answer with equal temper.

“Khushi don’t make it hard for yourself.” he warns me and i laugh.

“Having to breath under the same roof as you is hard enough. I don’t think anything can be harder.” yes. Raizada now you know rejection. I see that in your eyes. He presses my body against his with such force that I forgot to breath, not because of seduction but pain. The blinding pain creeps in my chest. I gasp for air. I think he senses this and losses his hold.

“Are you okay? Khushi?” I vaguely hear his voice and clench my jaws tightly. My focus is either on pain or how not to cry in front of him.  

“Khushi?” I feel soft mattress hit my body softly. He places something warm over my chest and presses it softly. Pain doesn’t lessen.

Think about happiness, think about mom...dad...zayn or that date night with Arnav...And despite the pain in my chest, I smile and give a short laugh…

“You think it’s funny?” he fumes and smile vanishes from my face. I frown. He stands up and look at me with fury, “If you think I care for you then you’re mistaken. You can die all I care for!” I stare at him wordlessly trying to suppress the pain in my chest. I try to mouth something but feel helpless. He calls for Marrie who comes running in and seeing me gets concerned.

“Are you okay?” Marrie asks me and I nod in yes even though the pain is killing me. I think my broken rib is still not fully healed.

“I’m tracking every call you make so think before you leap.” he leaves me with that hard expression on his face.

Just as he exIts, tears stream down like raindrops and Marrie cups my face with worry written all over her face.

“I’m dying with pain. Call Dr. Payal please!” I beg her and she calls the doctor immediately. I close my eyes trying to seek refuge from pain in darkness.

In that moment when i feared I’d die any minute I realized Arnav is such a bad liar. He is silly! You simply can’t unlove people. He simply can’t unlove me. And I realized, I love breathing under roof with Arnav. And then I miss Zayn very much. And then I realize, I’m a mess.  

But I don't mind. not today. 


Do you think khushi is in love with a second man? will Arnav let Zayn go that easily? 

I just wanted to update. comment please!


Feb 21

Elitists next part "cold" is up (By Farakhan) (Thanked: 25 times)



"Now we're slipping near the edge

Holding something we don't need

Oh, this delusion in our heads

Is gonna bring us to our knees"

“How do you feel?” I ask as she sits up staring at me unsure.

“F-fine.” she frowns. I nod walking to where my wife is sitting.

“I’m sorry...last night...I got angry…”

“Yeah...I guess, I should get used to your mood swings.” I open my mouth to reply but clench my jaws back. Nope. I need her now.

“I apologize…”

“Leave.” she says quietly.


“Just go. You’re a bad liar.” I try to smile and hold her hand which she instinctively pulls away.

“You should rest.” I say before exiting ‘our’ room. Outside I meet anxious  Marrie and smile at her artificially, “Go home, Marrie, you’ve been up all night!”

“But Mrs. Rai-”

“I’ll take care of my wife.” she stares at me unsure and I sigh, “Com’on, have some confidence in me!” she nods flushing and leaves after giving few instructions on medicines.

I return to my wife who is sleeping again probably the med’s effects.

A few drops of chloroform on the cotton handkerchief and she is knocked out.

“I’m sorry but you leave me with no other option.” I kiss her knuckles and whisper to her fingers, “I love you.”  

My phone rings...

“Sir, its done.” says the voice from the other side. 

“I’ll be there in ten minutes.” I cut the call and glance at her peaceful face. “Gently.” I whisper to myself scooping her up in my arms.

Me and my unconscious wife head toward our destination.

“What the f*ck do you think you are doing? Let me go! You psycho son of a ****!” yes, you hear it right, its Zayn, bound to chair and trying to kill me with his angry glares.

“You take the divorce thingy back and this psycho son of a **** will let you go.”

“F*ck you!”

“Gently, we’ve company.” I smirk seeing his face turning white seeing khushi on the chair opposite to him. I hate doing this but khushi forced me to. She called him. She persuaded him to run away. As if I would let him. She will unconsciously undo the damage.

I pull my pistol out and place it on her temple. He looks horrified.

“You won’t do that…”

“Watch me…”

“You’ll regret…”

“That’s none of your business, is it?”

“You are hurting-”

“Fifty seconds and two Wadcutters will pierce through her temple…”


“It’s ASR.”

“I promised her I won’t go back to lavanya…”

“Then watch her die.”

“You love her...you won’t kill her...you can’t…”

“When my parents died, I felt happy. I loved them and their death was the best thing that’s ever happened to me. It set me free.”

“You’re sick…”

“20 seconds..”

“Tug it away..” he shouts.

“Sign the papers first.”

He does and I glance at khushi’s tranquil face and then at my empty pistol.

“You’ll regret everything…” I hear him vaguely as I scoop khushi in my arm and in few minutes she is back on her bed with a vase full of Baby’s Breath on the nightstand beside her.


After 90 minutes.

“Hey…” I cup her face as she stares at me with confused crease between her eyebrows.

“Where am I? I feel...nice.” I smile.

“The medicine worked, I bet.”

“I still haven’t forgiven you.” she says pulling away from me.

“I’ll woo you back, sooner than you may expect.” I plant kisses on her cheeks and leave for office appointing two nice maids to look after her.  



The family dinner includes Zayn in it tonight. And khushi, of course. She will know, Zayn is back with Lavanya and Zayn will not even try to explain why he did what he did. The contract binds Zayn with Lavanya in a way he can’t escape.   

Khushi is mine. Now , finally.

“Sis relax! The food is perfect and so is Lavanya.” I say impatiently and my sister glares at me.

“So now I don’t even have a right to worry about my siblings?” she snaps indignantly.

“Sis, I didn’t say that.” it’s better to shut up so I reckon I should go and see khushi.

But there she is, wearing  nice blue sari and looking breathtakingly beautiful.   

“What did you do?” she demands angrily and I smile.

“What did I do?” I pull her nearer by her arm.

“What did you do to convince Zayn to get back with your sister?”

“That’s none of your business, jaane-e-man!” I caress her soft crimson cheeks and she sneers at me..

“This is my business! Zayn is my business….” my hand stiffens on her cheek and I clutch her jaws harshly making her wince.

“He will stay with my sister and there is nothing you can do to change it!” I jerk her away and she stumbles back. Her eyes fill up and she runs back to ‘our’ room.


I can just go to my room instead of sitting on this dining table and make love to khushi, apologize and kiss her tears away. But I won’t. I swallow the sushi with heavy heart.

“Excuse me…” its Zayn. I look up as he leaves the table to use ‘bathroom’.

If it weren’t for Lavanya telling me something, I would follow him immediately but I don’t. I wait for her to finish her speech and then I excuse myself and head to my room where I know that son of  **** would be.

As I slide open the already agaped door, I feel love draining out of my bones and coldness creeping in just like the old times when I hated everyone and everything. I feel betrayed like a fly caught in spider web. Like a bird caught in trap all of a sudden. I feel angry. Rage blinds me.       

“I love you,” she said as my nemesis placed his lips on hers.

I hate her...and i know she knows that too when she finds me staring at her. She opens her mouth to say something but I don’t hear it.

“Get out of my room.” I tell zayn passively.

“It’s not what you think it is…” yes I should assume, you were not kissing my wife and she wasn’t confessing her love to you.

“Get out!” I grit my teeth.

“Zayn go!” she says softly and he does.

I stare at her with my red, rage-filled eyes.


“It’s not-”

“-what I think it is?” I scowl.

“Please listen to me…” But I don't. I don’t think, I’ll ever be able to listen to you, khushi. Ever again.

She isn’t mine after all, I swallow hard, she never was.


Teaser will be in chapter 41 or 42. 

Comments! i need loads of them to know if I should really go with this fiction or not. 

what do you think about this triangle? do you think Arnav misunderstood something? 

Spoiler Alert! he partially did!

anyway I am not getting enough inspiration to write but if you suggest me nice songs which you think you can relate to this fiction, please recommend me. thank you!

Feb 22

Elitists next part *Sweet Creature* is up (By Farakhan) (Thanked: 29 times)


                                   "Sweet Creature"

Sweet creature, sweet creature

Wherever I go, you bring me home

Sweet creature, sweet creature

When I run out of road, you bring me home

I never imagined, not even in my wildest dreams to cry for Arnav, let alone falling in love with him.

I’ve lost my heart. But its complicated.

So why the hell has my life turned into a tangled and complicated mess like a carelessly knitted wool? I just can’t get out of this whole knotty mess and figure out what is wrong with me. I’m so mad, sad and tired. Its like I’m on the roller coaster of overwhelmingly emotional ride and I’m not enjoying it.

I shouldn't complain. I shouldn’t cry. But here I’m, crying my eyes out, lying on the same side of the bed and complaining to Devi Mayyan for all the pain and misery and complications.  

“I hate you, Arnav. I do!” I grit my teeth sitting up and wiping tears off my cheeks. I push the blankets off myself and totter toward wardrobe. I pull his clothes out and throw them everywhere, angrily. Panting, I break down again. Taking deep breaths, I pull passenger bag out and start dumping my clothes carelessly in it.  

I’m leaving this ****hole.

 I pull my shawl out, I feel something heavy hits the floor. Frowning, i bend to pick what looks like a diary. And stare at it for a second. leather bound diary with golden ‘2011’ inscribed on it. Just when I’m about to open it, I hear his footsteps behind me. Instinctively, I hid the diary in the nearby drawer.

“What are you doing?” he inquires surveying the messed up room.

“Packing,” I say turning my attention back to my half filled bag.  


“I’m leaving.” I respond candidly.

“Nope. You’re signing these papers.” he says pushing the papers in my direction.

I sigh indignantly. So he wants to bind me with him, forever. I shook my head.  

“**** you! I’m leaving!” I brawl throwing papers on his face.

“Khushi…” his voice is calm and controlled. “Don’t force me to do things you won’t like.” he pull his pistol out.

“Pull the gun on my temple like you did yesterday? I won’t be surprised!”

“Khushi…Do you like your new friend?” his voice dangerously low making me turn my gaze to Aiyla, the new maid.

“Go away!” I tell her seeing pistol in Arnav’s hand. She looks at me with her eyes filled with terror. “Arnav, don’t…”

“Sign these papers…” seeing me reluctant, he adds, “No one will find her dead body.”

“Arnav please…” I panic. Anxiety overwhelms me. I snatch the paper from his hand and sign it away with my hands shaking violently. I pant, tears blur my vision, I clutch the wardrobe door tightly.

“Leave, you’ve what you wanted.” I say blinking my tears away.

“I don’t.” he whispers and places his lips on mine.

He kisses me. One sided for I refused to respond. I have lost my heart, not my self control.

“Did he kiss you like this or was it better?”

“He didn’t kiss me. Get off me.” I try to push him away but he pins me to the wall and stares at me quietly.

“Why? Why did you betray me?”

“I did what?” I snarl. “You knocked me out, used me like a pawn, threw me away like a piece of **** and all this happened in complete secrecy! And you have the audacity to accuse me of betraying you? And this is just one example.”

“I didn’t kiss strange women.” he grits his teeth.

“I DIDN’T KISS HIM!” I say annoyed. “Does it physically hurt you to consider my emotions and views?” He doesn’t say anything, instead leaves with papers.

I sigh locking the door behind him. I rush toward the drawer and pull his diary out.

“I may not be able to leave you but This diary will help me tackle your mysteries.”

I slump down into the sofa and start reading. The diary is half-empty with small paragraphs or just  single lines as entries.

Three things I discovered are,

  1. He loves me very much.

  2. He has trust issues.

  3. He loved his mother.  

And then i place the diary back in his side of wardrobe.

“Should I bring lunch?” Aiyla asks hesitantly.

Its afternoon and I’m not even hungry.  

“No. I am not hungry.”

“You didn’t have your breakfast.”

“I’m not hungry. What part of it you don’t understand?” she breathes fearfully at my sudden outburst. Great! Now his temper is rubbing off me too!.

“Aiyla take the rest of the day off.” I say gently.


“Just take the day off!” i say annoyed and she leaves nodding. I stand up and start cleaning ‘our’ room.

Once the room is clean and clear, I take a shower and decide to sleep.

At midnight, I hear banging of something confusing it to be a part of my dream, I don’t worry about it but the sound becomes vivid so I open my eyes and find myself staring at entrance door. Someone is banging the door.   

I open the door carefully only to find Arnav who walks in stumbling and muttering something. He looks like a big mess with his hairs disheveled, red eyes, lip bleeding and tie loosened around stained collar.  

I stand in front of him and hold his arm gently. No matter how much I try, I can’t kill those soft feelings I’ve for him. So I try my luck by inquiring softly.

"Arnav..." he refuses to look at me. His eyes filled with angry tears. "Are you...okay?" I near him hesitantly, he doesn't reply.

"Stay away!" he hurls my hand away from his arm, "Why do you care?" he grits his teeth and I sigh. I can't see him like this. I walk near him and cup his face, kiss his tear away, he stares at me with his chocolate brown eyes filled with so many expectations and unknown feelings which I never saw there before. He is not the arrogant, strong and capricious ASR. He is broken and tired like a man in the midst of Sahara without water or food: tired and ready to die.

"Of course, I care!" I swallow the lump in my throat. He is my husband!  

"No, you don't. I know you don't!"

"Arnav I-"

"-Don't lie!"

"I am not!" he shook his head making me take a step back.

"Why would you care? I'm just a guy who is your husband in papers!" I close my eyes and breathe.

"I love you!" I confess. He stares at me expressionless and my heart sinks.    

What did I just do? Oh my God! No. I don’t want him to know how I feel. God. 

“You told him the same thing!” i wet my lips and sigh.

“You are hurt. Come.” I pull him to bed and clean his bloody lip and ask gently, “Did you get in a fight?”

“Hmm.” he stares at me with those brown eyes burning with desire. I swallow hard.

“You love me or...or him?” he asks with hope of an innocent child shining in his eyes. I cup his face and give him a small peck

“I love you...both.” I say feeling all the crazy feeling rising in my stomach.

“How is that even...possible?”

“I dunno!” I wipe his cheeks tenderly. “Are you hungry?” he shook his head, “Do you wanna sleep?” he shook his head again.  

I smile and place my lips on his. So we make love like we did on our wedding night, passionately and with a spark of hope that things will eventually turn out to be right. And that we will be fine.

“Sweet creature, you khushi, you bring me home… you are my home!” he whispers in my hairs and I laugh merrily cuddling him closer.

And oh we started

Two hearts in one home

I know, it's hard when we argue

We're both stubborn

I know,


Thank you for your response. 

ilysm! <3 

Feb 25

Elitists next part "Fear" is up (By Farakhan) (Thanked: 29 times)



“Love isn’t soft, like those poets say. Love has teeth which bite and the wounds never close.”

? Stephen King

Arnav's POV

When I was a child, I had this strange fear of death triggered from the strange story Granny told me more often than needed of how his grand father died at the age of 20 thus leaving young woman pregnant and it was almost customary for Raizada men to die soon. I always thought I would die before turning 20. I would soothe myself by all the logical and philosophical answers I could come up with. But fear stayed. It never left until I turned 20 and didn’t die. Even the truth of my parents couldn’t erase that fear.

They say you can rise about fear by facing it in the eye but how do one look death in the eye just to ‘rise above fear’ of it? Nope. it would make you more fearful. Knowing that my parents were fraud and that my actual mother was somewhere out there waiting for me to come home provided some kind of purpose in my life. And for that propose, I feared death-at-20 even more.

‘That was stupid of you to be so scared! Silly!’ I tell my past self but the truth is that I’m never fearless. I could never be fearless.

Holding her sleeping self in my arms, I think about all the fears I’ve had from infancy to adulthood. And out of all those silly yet real frights, I fear her the most. I fear her rejection. I fear her hate. Hell, I even fear her love.

I can’t seem to escape this frightful zone of ‘us’.

I feel like living with her will destroy me emotionally. She is a tornado that jiggle my head and destroys its peace and tranquility and she doesn’t even know the amount of damage her fierce and rebellious self brings to my head.

Yesterday she kissed another man after singing him a gentle ‘I love you’. Today she is in my arms after singing the same song just a few hours ago but in a strange manner. A rather dark one.

She loves us ‘both’ which is the most absurd thing I’ve ever heard.  

No you can’t have two hearts in your chest? Can you? No. she is confused.

‘Oh well the second love must chase first one away in order to exist. Do you find their love have disappeared in the waves of time?’ I hear a strong question rising in my head. I sigh.


‘She is playing you…’ but I don’t think Khushi is wicked enough to do that!

‘She is wicked enough to have you wrapped around her fingers just by a kiss…’

‘No. khushi can't…

‘Can’t what?’    

‘Play with me…’

‘Explain two-heart theory then…’

‘Not now’

‘You can’t love two people unless you wanna fool both.’ I close my eyes trying to get my head to talk nice and positive stuff but it won’t. Its my head. Stubborn as I’m. My lips dried up and I lick them and feeling thirsty, I unwrap myself quietly not to disturb her beauty sleep, get dressed and pour myself a whiskey instead of water.

Its 7:30 a.m. and my phone alarms me of the meeting I’ve on 8:30 A.M. sharp. I sigh stealing a glance at her beautiful face, I leave the room.   


Having an early meeting when you’re depressed isn’t an ideal situation.

“Tell me, Amit, there no meeting, I’m starving.”

“Sir your brunch is ready, shall I-?”

“Yes. what are you waiting for?” I brawl at him and he walks away nodding calmly probably used to my grumpiness.

All the people around here accept me as I’m except khushi.

‘She likes nothing about you..’ and then I’m reminded of all the hateful comments of hers. I am too haughty in her eyes and too grumpy and...what the **** am I even thinking?  

Sitting on the comfortable leather chair while waiting for brunch with my eyes closed, I decided to stay away from her. From her body especially. For her touch works like black magic bewitching me by depriving me of my senses.

When I’m with her, I’m hers. And I don’t wanna be hers. Not when she isn’t mine.  

I can’t.

Its too dangerous.

I’m determined to stay away from her. And when I’m determined, nothing can break that resolution.

The door of my office is unlocked and conceiving the person to be the waiter, I ignore him expecting to be left alone.

“Arnav…” If I’m not dreaming, it’s khushi. I jerk open my eyes and frown.

“What are you doing here?” I ask a bit harshly. She looks like she wasn’t expecting this tone from me.

“I..” she clears her throat, “I thought we could lunch together.”

“I’m not hungry…” I say nonchalantly.

“But you ordered food.”

“I ordered it for myself, you’re not included in me!” she frowns.

“But-” She starts but I cut her off dismissively.

“Leave, I’ve work.” 

“No. I’m not leaving without eating with you…” I stand up where she is standing and look her in the eyes with rage in my eyes.

“And what makes you so confident about ‘us’ suddenly?”

“I’m trying to make things work between us…”

“Why? Why now?”

“You’re my husband…” She says as-a-matter-of-fact-ly. 

“Wasn’t I your husband when you kissed him-” I retort angrily.


“I don’t trust you.”

“Arnav-” she tries to hold my arm but I jerk away instinctively for the fear of losing my mind again.

“Last night you-”

“Forget it, khushi.”

“No. I can’t.” she cups my face and I can’t look away from her beautiful eyes. I swallow my empty throat.

Resist. She is dangerous. 

“Let’s be honest with each other…” I say removing her hands from my cheeks, “You’re with me because you’ve no other option after contract…”

“After you bought me, in other words. No I don’t give a **** about the contract.”

“Yesterday you were ready to walk away.” I remind her bitterly and she sighs as if frustrated. “And I’m with you to keep my sister’s house intact.” I lie and once again I detect element of surprise in her eyes.

“So you’re saying…” she says rather sharply, “You don’t love me?”

“Yes I don’t.” I lie so genuinely that I might as well have believed this false confession.

She nods looking in my eyes, “Fine. Enjoy your brunch.” she says in a voice that I hardly recognize looking at the waiter who is standing at the door obediently waiting for order.

She leaves and I’ve no freaking idea why I feel so empty and dejected. And why I’m no longer hungry.    


Please comment. thank you.

Mar 4

Elitists next part 'Good Night' is up (By Farakhan) (Thanked: 44 times)


                                            "Good Night"


Whyfe: “How are you?’

‘Press send. Its alright’ but I don’t. Instead, I turn my phone off and put it away.

For the first time, I can’t pretend. In fact I feel angry. Why am I pretending to hate her? Why don’t I, in actuality, hate her? It hurts to pretend. Its becoming worse day by day...pretending to hate her while thinking about her all the time.

It’s been a month after that incident in my office. We still have not talk to each other. She didn’t call or text or even peeped in the dining room to see if I’m there.

I wonder if she think about me. Maybe she does. Maybe she doesn’t. Its so hard to guess the possibilities when the probability of losing is 50/50. In either case, risk is undiversifiable.   

The kind of investment that brings loss never attracts wise investors. Why did I invest so much of myself in this relationship knowing, deep down, it will end up in loss? I must be imprudent investor.

I just wanna kiss her violently, lick her tongue, hold her tight in my arms, feel her velvety skin against mine with her hands in my hairs. And her ‘I love you.’ just for myself not ‘both’ of us. Is it too much to ask?

I wanna take her out on fancy dates and holidays, buy her nice, lovely dresses and make love to her like a faithful husband would.

I just want her love, all for myself. I want absolute advantage in her life. Which probably is too much to ask… for she hasn’t even missed me, it seems. She didn’t call...so…

‘Call her if you are so desperate!’

‘Yes I should.’

I turn on my phone and find three missed calls from sis and sigh. I need to go home. It's a grand family dinner where my wife wouldn’t care to join again.  

I decide to go home. Office is vacated, all the employees left presumably enjoying nice dinners with their families or hot dates.  


Upon reaching third floor, I find khushi, sitting on the floor in living room, engrossed in writing something fervently on the notebook apparently mathematics. Nobody write sitting on the floor except her.  

I open my mouth to interrupt her work but decide otherwise. What would I say anyway? And then, noticing me, she raises her head, stares at me passively for a second and then goes back to whatever she is doing.

I let out my held breath.

Her eyes were same as that morning in my office: cold and expressionless. I swallow hard. That’s not fair.

I walk in ‘our’ room and pull my clothes out of neatly arranged cupboard, carelessly.

I haven’t slept in this room for a month. I stare at the empty bed and bite my lip. I miss her so much. I just wanna love her.

I shook my head. No. don’t show weakness. Don’t let her win. Fight against her influence. There is nothing you can’t do. You’re the great ASR.

After changing, I walk back to where khushi is still writing and call her, “Khushi…”

“Yes.” she replies without looking up at me.

“We are expected in dining room…” I say in a false composed voice.

“I’m not hungry…” she trails off and it angers me. Suddenly, all the frustration and rage that’s been filled up inside, overwhelm me.

“We are leaving.” she looks up at me sensing the change in my tone.  

“You are leaving. And don’t forget to lock the door behind you.” taking long steps, I close the distance between us, grab her wrist and forcefully make her stand up. The books in her lap fell on the floor with a soft thud and she looks at me with anger in her wide eyes.

“How dare you-?” I cut her off by seizing her lips in a passionate kiss. She tries to push me away but I catch her arm in steely grip and pull away only when breathless. She glares at me.

“Leave me…” she struggles to get out of my hold and gaze at her pretty face ignoring her grapples. “Are you deaf?”

“We are going downstairs…” I say losing my grip on her wrist and arm.

“No. we aren’t. You are.” she snaps at me and I sigh.

“Why are you so stubborn?” I frown.

“Why are you so inconsiderate?”

“I Am Inconsiderate?” I almost shout.

“And stubborn and egoistic.”

“You don’t see anything good in me, do you?”

“You’re cute when drunk…” my mouth dries remembering that night...it was so… DON’T GET DISTRACTED! I mentally scream at myself. But God, I miss her.

“Get dressed, khushi.” she doesn’t budge. “Don’t you get tired of fighting?”

“I fight?”

“No. I do. All the bad stuff is on me. You are marquese of angels, aren’t you?”

“You came home after a month only to argue with me?”

“You’re annoying.”

“Then divorce me…” she shrugs and pushes black locks behind her ears.

“Tsk. Tsk. As you must have figured by now, you are stuck with me for a long time.”

“So are you Raizada.”

“Let’s go.” I insist holding her hand.

“Arnav...I’m studying...just go.” she looks tired so I give up.

“Get some sleep, khushi.” I murmur exiting the floor.

“There is the groom of century!” I hear painfully familiar voice and regret coming home. Sheetal Jha with her annoying grin. I fake a smile and sit on the only empty chair beside her.

“Where is Zayn?” I ask Lavanya who smiles.

“He’s got work.”  

“Is Zayn hot, Lavanya? Won’t you tell me everything?” Sheetal asks enthusiastically making Lavanya blush and I cringe. “How about we go shopping tomorrow?”

“Perfect!” Anjali grins.

I eat in silence.

“You should really keep tissues nearby.” Sheetal whispers in my ear and I turn to face her.


“Khushi loves warm pink lip-colors, doesn’t she?” I sigh and lick my lips.

“Is it that obvious?”

“As obvious as your broken heart in your sleeves.”

“Not that obvious, then.” I mutter.

“You don’t deserve her. I almost feel bad for the girl.” Sheetal whispers again.

“I’m flattered.” I scoff.

“Khushi isn’t me, remember that.” I turn to see her side profile and glare at her angrily. “I know you think I’m dumb,,” she starts when I start eating again, “But I know you…”

“No you don’t. And weren’t you supposed to stay in college till your semester end?”

“I was. But-” she was interrupted by her brother, “Do you like it there?”

“Yes. its perfect place and thank you for the swimming pool…”

“So you met some hot guy?” Lavanya inquires smiling mischievously.  

“Yes…” I roll my eyes. She is a female version of me having as many boyfriends as a woman can handle. “He is nice...you know...and he is my first real boyfriend.”


“Yeah...I’ll tag him along next time…”

“Where is khushi?” mami asks noticing khushi’s absense too suddenly and I clear my throat.

“She is not hungry.”

“She never gets hungry. Hello hi bye bye!”

“What do you mean?” I ask alarmed.

“She eats like a bird. Probably dieting. Now I know why she is so thin.” and I feel guilty all of a sudden. She is hungry because she doesn’t want me around. Or maybe she hates crowds.

“I’ll go and see her. Good night.”


Walking upstairs, I command HP to bring food to ‘our’ room.

“Khushi…” I interrupt her reading some book, “You haven’t eaten, have you?”

“Doesn’t matter…” she dismisses me and resume reading. I grab the book from her hands and put it away somewhere and make her stand up in front of me.

You matter.” I say and she snorts.

“It doesn’t matter. Whatever you say doesn’t matter.”

“Alright but you’re not eating. This is imp-”

“-why are you fretting? Just go and do your work. I can take care of myself.”

I’ll always worry...I’ll always fret khushi. I love you.’ but it stays inside instead, i make her sit on the settee with my arm around her shoulders and kiss her temple.  

“Don’t hurt yourself...please.” I plead and earn silence in return.

“I’m not hungry.” she says as the maid left placing food on the coffee table.

“Eat. just a few bites.” she doesn’t fight or argue.

“I’ll freshen up.” I nod and she goes away taking with her slight and sweet smell of rose and jasmine. I gaze off thinking nothing in particular but a picture of my mom flashing again and again in my head and I wonder why.  

She sits right where she was sitting before and eats. I watch her take small bites and chewing it almost painfully as if her jaws are exhausted in the process.

“Kheer. You like it.” she shook her head.

“No. I’m full. I...I...wanna sleep.”

“Yeah…” I nod my head with a heavy heart, “I’ve work in office. Good night.”

“Good Night.” I leave with half a heart.


next update depends on your response. Good Night! 

Mar 6

Elitists: Chapter#44 "Estazolam" is up (By Farakhan) (Thanked: 51 times)



Meri Bebasi Ka Bayaan Hai / Bas Chal Raha Na Iss Ghadi

8 weeks later…

Khushi's POV

I just wish I could tap into speed force and go back in time to change things or peep into future to see if it was all worth the trouble.

But I can’t.

It’s not fiction, it’s life.

I am sick, depressed and lonely. And no-one knows this.

I am bottling up my emotions and I know it’s not healthy. No! Its not healthy but I can’t open up.

How can I open my heart to Arnav? A man who doesn’t trust me. Who is a liar. Who loves his work above everything. Who sees no one above himself. His anger, his emotions matter nothing else exist in his eyes.

He wants me all for himself but he has no idea how he is striping me off myself. I haven’t seen or talked with my parents for months and I’ve not gotten out of this ****ing house for 2 months because THAT SON OF A **** THINKS I’LL RUN AWAY!!!

 I’m locked up here because of that day's incident. I wish I knew how to make him understand my point of views, my feeling but I know one thing: it’s killing me. this isolation is killing me. 

Loving him hurts.

I crave gentleness. I crave soft kisses. I crave human touch. All of this is unexpected from him.

How can I be foolish enough to fall for him? How can I forget that he is the ASR who changes his colors like chameleon? Don’t tell me I’m too harsh, he deserves it.

I am angry. Yes. I am angry at Arnav for being so closed off and unempathetic. I am angry at my family for being poor and weak and I’m angry at Zayn for being in love with me and I’m angry at Lavanya for even existing. Above all, I’m angry at myself for being pathetically weak. Love makes you weak and when you love two people at the same time, it makes you crazy.

I take a deep breath trying to stop myself from crying.

‘Its not your fault! You can’t control this ****! Stop bullying yourself.’ says a voice in my head.

‘Call Arnav.’ whispers another voice

‘No call Zayn, he’ll understand.’ another voice

‘ASR is tracing your calls, it’ll make matters worse.’ and then another.

“Shut up! I don’t need anyone!” I yell at myself. Breathing heavily, I stroll towards ‘our’ room, unlock the door and turn on the lights. I open the cupboard and pull out a drawer where my undergarments are kept and retrieve a small bottle of Estazolam 5 mg, unscrew the cap and overturn the bottle spilling warm-pink tiny pills on my open palm.

‘Don’t khushi’ my conscience warns me but I’m too dazzled to hear that.

‘Just tonight..’  


‘It’s last…the bottle is empty’


‘Last time...I promise...’


But I gulp the pills effortlessly and drink water.

Now I can sleep and forget everything. I have been doing this for weeks now. It works.

Anything that provides escape is good.

I close my eyes standing in front of cupboard like a statue thinking about nothing for my mind is fogging up like glass window in winter.  

tujhe pehli baar main milta hoon, har dafa

meri bebasi ka bayaan hai (O soniyaa)

tujhe chheen loon ya chhod doon

tujhe maang loon ya mod doon

I hear knock on the door and shook my head trying to compose myself. What if its him? I open the door to find Sheetal.

“Didn’t you leave weeks go?” I frown.

“Is ASR inside? I really need to talk to him.” she smiles earnestly.

“He’s not home.”

“Oh. are you okay?” she asks and I put on a fake smile.

“Yes! Yes! Come in.” I feel dizzy but blink hard to compose myself.   

“You look sad…” she says walking in. I don’t reply so she continues, “I am back because this time they kicked me out and I really could use your husband’s help...” she laughs and I don’t really understand what she means. I am trying to stand still

Don’t. I breath in but fail miserably. I hold my chest and cough.

“Are you okay?” I hear her vague shouts as I collapse on the hard floor hitting my head on the solid floor. I open my eyes wide trying to escape the black dot invading my consciousness but it grows swiftly and I find myself in a dark hole.

Unconscious as if dead.   

I open my eyes and close them immediately feeling whiteness stinging my eyes. Maybe I’m dead and it’s afterlife. Maybe God is all white. I slowly open my eyes and meet white sky or is it ceiling? I look around and realize, I’m in hospital and with this realization, I remember taking pills and Sheetal and passing out. I swallow hard. The door opens and he walks in.

“Khushi…” I look at the panic-stricken face of my husband.

“What happened?” I ask uncertainty.

“You were in coma for a week…” he says hoarsely as if he would cry any second.

“I’m sorry...I didn’t mean to…” just the the doctor walks in and Arnav is told to leave which he reluctantly does.

“How do you feel?” the doctor asks me scribbling something on the clipboard.

“Like a person who slept in one position all night!”

“You’re gonna be alright.” she smiles at me and I feel a needle piercing in my skin. I **** my head to the right and from the glass window, I see Zayn staring at me and I feel guilt coursing through me. In few minutes, the sedatives overwhelm every emotion in my head and I find myself dreaming of my dead babysitter who is cooking nice kabaabs and rice and singing odd songs in a rather loud voice.

I meet you for the first time, every time,

it's the voice of my helplessness (O my love)

should I snatch you or leave you,

should I ask for you or let you go another way..



Next update depends on your response. Good Night! 

Mar 23

Elitists Chapter 45 (A) "Spy" is up (By Farakhan) (Thanked: 32 times)

Chapter#45 (A)


**2 Months ago**  

***Continued from chapter 43***

[She sits right where she was sitting before and eats. I watch her take small bites and chewing it almost painfully as if her jaws are exhausted in the process.

“Kheer. You like it.” she shook her head.

“No. I’m full. I...I...wanna sleep.”

“Yeah…” I nod my head with a heavy heart, “I’ve work in office. Good night.”

“Good Night.” I leave with half a heart.]

Khushi’s POV

“Hey Khushi!” I look up from my plate at the very enthusiastic greeter’s face and nod in response passively. I am sitting on the table with the woman I hate, do you expect me to be all smiley?  

“I’m Sheetal, in case you forgot.” I roll my eyes.

“No. how can I forget my lifetime best friend?” I glower at her and she smiles dumping food in her plate.

“I see why ASR married you.” she winks and I just shook my head she is sitting right in front of me so its hard to not show how annoyed I’m. .

“You look good in green.?”

“I like green.”

“And why pink lipstick?”

“How would you know I wore it before?” I ask frowning at my food. Is DM planning to ruin my day this way?

“Last night it was on ASR’s lips.” I think everyone is looking at me so I don’t look up, “Okay. I didn’t say anything and you guys didn’t hear it, alright?” they all nod probably used to her craziness.   

“We are going shopping after brunch, why don’t you join?” After few moments, in-between the noise of forks and knives, she speaks again.

I look at her unsure if she is talking to me. As if sensing my confusion she declares, “I’m speaking with you.”

“No I don’t….I’m busy…” I say focusing too much on my plate  as if its some kinda artwork. Okay i am nervous and conflicted. Since I’ve been locked up for a month, I could just go and have fun but then these women are unpredictable, I don’t want any drama here.

“Oh c'mon all you do is read or do some crazy math questions. Just chill. Okay?” I don’t reply so she continues, “You are 20 right?” I nod, “I’m 22 so you can trust me. Its a very important year of your life and if you lose the fun in it, you’ll probably grow old in a very odd and monotonous way.”

“That’s bull****!” I protest suddenly having visions of my unlucky, boring life. The lively girl in me dominates all the other girls living in my body.

“Honey, you know I’m not lying. Deep down you do.” i gulp the food and sigh in defeat. I can’t believe I’m influenced by her ****ty theory. Its stupid but I trust her anyway.

“I’ll come.”

“Perfect.” she chirps triumphantly and I stare at my empty plate ready to leave the dining table.

After brunch, we- Me, Lavanya, Sheetal, Anjali and mami- set out for shopping. I am half-enthusiastic, half-nervous about this affair and I know, I should just enjoy but I can’t. These four ladies are beyond me. So damn different from me in a way I don’t like.

Once in grand market, we scatter like bees keeping safe distance. Without the knowledge of where other women go, I walk around the market looking through the glass window at fancy clothes, shoes, shawls, perfumes, jewelry and so on.

But i don’t buy anything. As i walk in the lane, m attention is caught by an antique shop, there is a strange silver bound little book in the corner of the window display. I walk in the shop and stare t it for a moment before asking the the shopkeeper to show me.

Its an archaic copy of “Charaka Samhita” and buy it. That’s the first thing I brought from my husband’s money.

When I turn around from the counter after paying and grabbing my package of book, I bump in someone and look up baffled. My mouth opens in surprise but then I smile pleasantly. I pull him out of the shop.

“What are you doing here?” I ask and Zayn smiles.

“Came here to see you.”

“How did you know, I’m here?”

“Tracked your phone.”

“You nedy freak!” I glare at him.

“How are you?” he asks, his voice laced with concern.

“Fine. what about you? How about your hot wife?” he rolls his eyes annoyed at my tone.

“I’m fine. I am not the one having eating disorder here so…” I stare at him for a second to understand what he just said.

“What eating disorder?”

“You never eat, so?”

“Wait! How do you-?”

“That’s not important! What important is that why you’re never eating?”

“Answer me first.”

“I got this thingy in Lavanya’s phone so when she speaks on or around the phone, I can hear what she or anyone around her say. Last night, her mami said you never really eat...khushi tell me what is wrong? This isn’t you!”

“I had periods so…” I lie looking away.


“Are you spying on Lavanya? That’s so unethical!” I say changing the subject. He suddenly remembers something and holds my hands in his.

“There is something Important you need to know.”

“What?” I ask startled.

“I’m going to be a dad.”

“What?” I think my jaws just touched the ground. Oh my my! Isn’t that too much? I smile. He is going to be a father!

“Congratulations!” I say finding my voice back and hug him tightly feeling overwhelmed.

Finding him silent, I break the hug and hold his arms.

“What? Wait!...aren’t you happy?”

“I...I am not sure.”

“You guys aren’t thinking about abortion, are you?”

“I don’t know this information. I mean I don’t know Lavanya is pregnant.”

“I don’t understand!” I frown.

“I heard her talking to her doctor through the chip.”

“Oh.” I say and then add quickly, “don’t be scared zayn. You gonna make one hell of a father!” I beam at him but he doesn’t smile back.

“The only thing I want from Lavnya is divorce.” I, for a moment, don’t know what to say.

“Don’t do this to a baby. He is a part of you! Please…think about it. The child can be a blessing in disguise…”

“You see beauty in everything...even a forced child.”

“You’re gonna be fine! Trust me!”

 “Khushi...Its not about me not wanting a child. I would love nothing more than that.”

“Then what? What are you hiding from me Zayn?”


“-Is he your friend Khushi?” I turn to face Sheetal who is smiling at Zayn checking him out from head to toe. I never hated Sheetal more than now.

“I’m Sheetal.”

“Zayn.” he shakes his hand with hers and she smiles at him flirtatiously.

“****y name.”

“I get that a lot.” wait is he flirting back? My mouth parts in shock.

“Zayn is going.” I say interrupting their chit-chat.

“Yeah. I’m. It was nice meeting you miss Sheetal. You smile is charming by the way.”

 “OMG Do you have more hot friends like him?” I feel jealousy surging inside me.

“No I don’t.” I snap at her and march away from the antique shop and plunge into the market buying everything that please my eyes even if I won’t ever use it. Never have i ever shopped so much!

At last home. I lay in the bed and fall asleep immediately.

I feel something warm beside me and snap out of my drowsiness.

“It’s you!” I sigh in relief seeing Arnav staring back at. He seems drunk. Pretty drunk.

“Why did you do it?”

“I did what?” I demand and he shoves his phones in my hands and I look at the screen adorned with the photograph of me hugging Zayn taken in an inappropriate angle making it look like something way too intimate. I sigh. I open my mouth to say something but he kisses me passionately. We kiss for minutes and undress each other aggressively. And then we made love. All night.  


Part B is coming soon...okay my window crashed so could not write/post any of my fiction. 

Next update on your response.

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Elitists last part is up!