Dark FF- Elitists *completed*

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Mar 28

Elitists Chapter 45 (B) "Lonely and Mean" is up (By Farakhan) (Thanked: 46 times)

Chapter# 45 (B)




 

                                             "Lonely and Mean"




 


Khushi’s POV


He woke up and left. Yes that’s exactly what he did. He left me alone after what we had last night. I close my eyes cuddling closer to the sheets that are covering my body. He left. He just left. Without talking or listening. He just left.

This isn’t fair, if we don’t talk, we’ll end up hurting each other more and I don’t want that.

He doesn’t trust me...I sigh.

‘Do you trust him like you trust Zayn?’ a voice in my head whispers and I brush it away. I don’t have any answer. If he think I cheated on him then there is nothing I can do except talk this out and he won’t listen.

Kicking the sheets off myself, I walk toward the bathroom.

I’m tired, too tired to think to even get upset with Arnav. Right now, I want water to cool my head off. So we are going for cold shower. Not hot. Not today at least.

I’ve always hated cold water. Not always actually. I just...it just brings memories. Memories of my dad’s dark brown and green eyes staring back in my hazal orbs with so much love. I just miss him. I’m missing him. 

I miss his strong, possessive hold around my shoulder; his soft yet powerful voice; his terrible singing skills; his horrible art skills; his whining about how my mom was so into Payal’s problems that she didn’t even remember him and most of all his snuggles. I didn’t need bedtime stories when he held me in his arms. I would sleep listening to him breathe and his heart beating so softly against my tiny face. Those moment of tranquility are gone.

Tears roll down my cheeks as I stare at my reflection, “I miss you, dad!”. I wipe my tears, grab my clothes and start putting them on.




*Flashback*



“Dad, I want a husband!” I say plopping on the sofa beside him.

“What? Who fed you this stuff?”

“Payal.”

“I really don’t like that woman. Look at me khushi. Darling. I’m your dad and you’ll always love me more than anyone and *holds my shoulders* don’t think about what that silly woman says.” my dad’s biggest fear is losing us- me and mom. The loss includes us loving anyone more than him.

“But mom has a husband.” he leans back freeing me from his hold.

“That’s because, I’m perfect for your mom.”

“What does perfect means?” I ask moving closer to him. He puts his arm around me.

“I know when she is upset, mad, tired or happy. She knows me too. That’s all I know about perfection. Anyone who understands you and treat you kindly is perfect.”

“I want a husband too then!”

“Darling,” he makes me look at him by holding my tiny chin, “Don’t ever settle for less than perfection! I will not forgive you otherwise!”

“I can’t believe this! You’re talking to our 7 year old daughter! For God sake! about what?” my mom’s unnoticed presence gets noticed by her fiercy voice as she pulls me in her rms and starts kissing my cheeks. Cajoling me is her favorite hobby.  

“No your best friend put the idea in her mind. I am just fulfilling my duty!” I stare at both, confused. I want a husband, a perfect one to make my dad proud of my choice. He’ll be so happy one day, won’t he? if I've two, it'll make him more happy...

“Can I have two husbands?” they both stare at me dumbfounded and I smile, “Payal said she would get me married to her son, Arnie. She said I would be perfect for him! And then she said I can have as many husband as I want, I’m that good!”

“This is what she feeds my daughter!” I hear my dad’s angry voice.

“My beautiful girl, forget what she said, okay? she just misses her son, that's all.” I forgot arnie. I did until I realized, I’m married to him.



*Flashback Ends*



And now when I think about it, it makes me sad. So lonely. I can’t look up at stars. Just scared that my father is looking at me with disappointment in his otherwise warm eyes filled with pride. Marrying Arnav is not bad in itself. We were fine until that morning. It was all okay or so I thought it was. But then everything changed and now with his inconsiderate attitude, I feel like my dad is angry with me.

I hate Payal. She loved her son. But I don’t want to love him. I want gentleness and he is nowhere near gentle.

No. no he is the reason why I don’t feel the connection with my parents anymore. I keep having dreams of that night when they died in the accident and him telling me “it’s okay.” and me crying, begging them to wake up.

Its not fair.

Maybe this is how loneliness feels like when you lose contact with the people and spirits you hold so precious.   

I need to get myself together. I sigh and wipe my face with tissues and start putting makeup on. Its not much but enough to not make me look like a dead clown devoid of colors and life.

I leave my room to eat. Breakfast is important. No matter what, I’m not worrying Zayn about this thingy anymore. So I’ll eat. Yeah at least try.

I feel moody today. Like I’m angry but I’m not. I’m sad for sure but frustrated too. Its so annoying. I just want people in this mansion to disappear. Like I want Lavanya to die. Like really die. I’m sure she is thinking the same from her stare, I fathom that.

“I would feel bad for owning your husband if you hadn’t try to kill me with your stares.” I whisper once we are the only ones left here.

“You’re shameless!”

“Says whom?” No. I wanna be mean. I wanna hurt her like I’m hurting. I wanna hurt everyone including her brother. “He’ll always be mine!” And I leave the salty-ass **** alone with her tongue tied to her throat.







Evening

“You’ll stay away from Lavanya, won’t you?” He barges inside that room and pins me to wall in a flash. I stare at him dumbfounded. I try to open my mouth but he puts pressure on my arms and stresses, “You won’t get out of the room as long as Lavanya is here.” I frown.

“Get away from me! You psycho son of a ****!”

“Don’t abuse my mom!” he pushes me into the wall angrily and I think my shoulder is dislocated. I try to nip the pain.

“Arnav...I hate you!” he stares at my face, his face devoid of emotions. “And I hate everything that’s associated with you!” I grit my teeth. In that moment, I hated him, I hated his mother too despite all the kindness and love we shared.

“Don’t get out of this room.” he says still hurling me in the wall.

“Get away from me before I abuse your mother again.” we stare in each other’s eyes fiercely, each ready to unleash assault on the other but something stops me from hurting him. Something powerful. The same thing that makes me feel protective of Zayn. this thing stops me from telling him meaner things. Things that I know are powerful enough to rip his shell of a pride.

“You’ll stay away, won’t you?”

“You ****ing dislocated my shoulder, get away from me!” I shout unable to bear the pain. I think my eyes are red from unshed tears. He lets go suddenly.

“I...khushi...I...I’ll…” he holds me gently, i push myself away from him.

“Leave. I’ll stay away.” I nod my head as I say that swallowing the lump formed in my throat.

“Khushi I’ll…” I look at his troubled face waiting for him to say something but he won’t.

“Leave, I’m tired. I’ll call the doctor myself.” he stares at me for a moment and in that moment, I strongly hoped he would stay but it didn’t last long. He left. He left mutely just like before. And I break down feeling lonelier than ever.

My father is watching me with disappointment written all over his face. My mother is crying. And I wanna brush the portrait away with my hands but the pain in my shoulder makes me realize, I should call the doctor.

Then fix this.

That was the first time, I took the pill, just to make my dad’s gaze go away. Just to run from emptiness. Just to feel numb. Just to escape...

....




okay please comment. 

next update will be posted after a very good response! 


ILY SO MUCH *KISSES* 

Apr 1

Elitists Chapter 46 "Peace" is up (By Farakhan) (Thanked: 38 times)

Chapter#46







                                              "Peace"









“She is asleep?” Sheetal asks her eyes wandering around finding someone.

“What are you doing here?”

“I came here to see khushi.” I frown. There is no way in hell she cares about khushi. I roll my eyes.

“Don’t roll your eyes, I adore her.” she shrugs and smiles turning her gaze back at my tired face.

“You gonna tell me about this Zayn guy?”

“Why are you so obsessed with him in the first place?” I say grabbing her hand and pulling her out of the emergency ward. We end up sitting in cafe without her answer.

“I love this coffee!” I don’t say anything..

“ASR.” after a few moments of silence, she speaks up, “I don’t like him romantically but…I’m curious. And you know you can just tell me what’s going on and I’ll stop.”

“There is nothing you should worry about except of course getting back to university and studying.”

“You are an idiot!”

“So are you,” I whisper tiredly leaning back on the chair.

We don’t talk anymore. She waits with me for khushi to wake up..

How do I feel?



I’m sad. In fact, I have never been this sad before. All the anger, resentment, insecurities and grudges, seem so secondary and useless. I feel protective for Khushi like never before. I wanna conceal her from everyone including myself something I never thought I was capable of.

As I sit in the crowded cafe, my mind goes silent. For the first time in my life, I taste peace. There is nothing worrying me anymore. I just need a second chance.

When she was inside the OT, I thought the world was crumbling down and I was getting smaller and smaller. I couldn’t think. I couldn’t, not until he doctor said she was alive. I questioned her sanity when the doctor proposed a supposedly suicide attempt. My first reaction to Khushi’s action was of course anger. How dare she take such a step as suicide? Didn’t she know there were people worried sick for her?

It was zayn who spoke interrupting my mad thoughts, “It’s not suicide, khushi would never do that.” yes I called him there. He was present yet unreachable. He didn’t fight with me for khushi or glared a me or even responded to any of Sheetal’s comments. He was silent and passive, so was I.

“Mr.-?”

“Zayn.”

“Mr. Zayn, I hope you’re right but for that we’ve to wait for the patient to wake up.”  

I thought, she did try to kill herself. Yes I admit, I didn’t have enough faith in her but can I or anyone blame me for that? We hardly know each other…

Zayn. he knows her. He knows what’s in her heart. Like an open book, he can read excerpts from her thoughts even when they are broken. And it makes me so damn jealous.

After talking to him, I'm both sad and at peace, it's ****ing weird! 







An hour before Sheetal arrived…




“Hey…” I clear my throat. “I wanna thank you for…” he looks at me with his blank eyes, “For donating your blood.” he doesn’t reply. He glances at khushi sleeping form, I follow his glance.

“It was nothing.” he says and walks away.

“Wait…” I clear my throat, he turns around expecting me to say whatever it is hurriedly. “Can we talk?”

“What do you wanna talk?” he says walking back to where he was standing just a moment ago.

“How do you know it wasn’t a suicide?”

“She wouldn’t do that.”

“How-?”

“Things aren’t always black and white. They don’t have to be!”

“But still-”

“I know her heart. She would never intentionally hurt her family in any way.” he says staring at her face through glass window and it makes sense. Once again i curse myself for not realizing such important detail. Khushi would not commit suicide. Never. Not when it was her family at stake. She would never want them to feel responsible for her death and spend rest of their lives grieving. “You don’t know her, do you?” I have no answer to his firm question. I just know she is mad, fascinating, sometimes hedonic and most of the times extremely determined person who is too honest for her own good.

“I don’t.”

“You can’t know people if you fear them. You fear her.” I stare at his face searching for some expression but its cold and empty.

She was/is my biggest fear. Loving her hurts. I hate the word “weak” and she literally reigns over the control panel of my head and heart combined..

If you fear weakness, you fear love and when you fear love, you fear your beloved. The fear turns into anger prodding you to hurt them, make them weaker so they won’t hurt you in anyway. I tried that too but it didn’t work. Instead observing all my tricks and actions, love laughed harder and I fell in its trap deeper and deeper.

But what am I supposed to do? I never know. Except running away from her and my heart. Maybe he knows. So I seek his help despite my ego and anger and jealousy for him.

“What would you do if you were me?” he looks in my eyes and there is something which wasn’t there before.

“Love her despite all everything. Never abandon her.” he fixes his gaze at khushi again, “The universe gave you a gift and you didn’t know how to cherish it.

“Arnav, You don’t run away from love. There is no on and off system in here *points towards heart*, you embrace the feelings, go with the flow even if it ends with you drowning. Feel the pain even if it paralyzes you for there is a subtle pleasure in love’s burning flames.” *after a pause* “If you’re worthy, you won’t give up.” he says looking at me, “But if you don’t cherish her, remember, I’m always here.” it’s a warning and it doesn’t anger me today like it would have other times. I divert my gaze from his face to khushi’s.  

It all make sense now. All the stupid thoughts seem senseless. All the insecurities pointless like Greek mythologies. All the fears conquerable. And I feel brave. Like an emperor who has his kingdom under control and ready at his command.   

“I want to cherish her always..” I say determined but realize, he has left already.  






.....


My uncle died 2 days ago leaving three children. Pray for his soul and his family. 

I won't update any of my other fictions until this one ends. only 4 chapters away from ending.

Apr 9

Elitists Chapter 47 (A) "Self-Centered" is up (By Farakhan) (Thanked: 30 times)

SHORT UPDATE BUT HEY BETTER THAN NOTHING!

Chapter#47 (A)








After I wake up, I meet a young, golden skinned girl with long hair tied in pony tail and red lips and long eyelashes. She is gorgeous. Sitting right in front of me on the chair, reading but stops realizing I’m awake.

“Welcome back to Earth! How are you feeling.”

“Nice. I guess.” I say sitting up.

“I have some questions for you. If you feel good enough to talk…” In her voice, there is gentleness as if she understands. As if she is my mom.

“Are you a doctor?” I ask unsure. She smiles and nods dumping her book in her large leather bag and pulls out a small notebook.

“Part time doctor, full time mom.” I sigh. I’ll never be able to claim this. I’ll never be a mom. And it hurts to think about it.  

“Did anyone try to kill you?” I stare at the doctor confused.

“No.”

“So was it suicide?” she raises her perfectly plucked eyebrows.

“No. I would never-” suddenly I stop, realizing I really don’t know myself anymore.

“Was it?” she gazes at me earnestly and it makes me nervous. I knew taking pills was bad but I took them anyway. Could you call it suicide?

“No.” I say firmly and she nods.

“You are suffering from insomnia?”

“I don’t know...maybe yes...my head isn’t okay. That’s all I know.”

“Mood swings?”

“Yes.” I nod my head.

“Did you know the side-effects of these pills? If you don’t feel good in two weeks, you’re suppose to give up on them…”

“I knew.”

“Why then would you take pills? Weren’t you warned by your doctor? Did he/she recommended these to you?” I bite my lip.

“Yes. I was warned but my doctor doesn’t know about this whole thing. I told her I was okay.”

“I appreciate your honesty but can you tell me what prode you to take these pills every night?”

“I had nightmares…” I shrug trying hard not to cry.

“I’m not here to judge you Miss Khushi...I’m here to help…” I look up in her gentle reddish brown eyes and nod conveying that I understand. “So tell me exactly what’s on your mind right now.”

“My husband and my friend.”

“What makes you think about them?”

“I love them both romantically.” I confess and wait for her reaction. She just nods.

“Tell me about it.”

“You don’t think it’s weird, do you?” she laughs making me more nervous.

“You know what’s weird? A guy who killed ten people and ate their faces. Literally, he did that! And he confessed to me that he “just wants to be a normal kid again”. The news went viral on twitter.”

“Don’t you think he can be normal again?” I feel defensive for that kid whoever he is.

“No.”

“Why not? That’s cynical to assume that he can’t be normal again! ”  

“Because he did it for fun. He got bored and found killing people and mutilating their bodies funny.” I’m tongue tight. “Psychology or any other science has no treatment for madness or love.” She opens her small notebook and scribbles something there. “Tell me about your husband and your best friend.”

“You said Psychology can’t help so why wasting our time?”

“But I don’t find loving two people weird so I might help. Or at least try. Besides, I like you” She smiles and I try to smile too but give up the idea.

“I love him. Arnav, my husband. And Zayn is my Ex-boyfriend. We both grew up together. Fell in love, got engaged. But couldn’t marry for some reasons. Arnav and I know each for two or three years. I worked in their house. I was a maid. We got married.”

“Why marry Arnav and not Zayn?”

“Because I love too much and it hurts.” How can I tell her all the events and painful memories?

“Who would you choose now?” I look at her suddenly feeling weak.

“If I could, I would choose Zayn…” I say honestly though it made me exhausted.

“Why?”

“Because all I ever wanted was to be understood and loved. And Arnav...he...he...he is self-centered...” I feel my vision swirling and close my eyes tightly holding my face in my hands.

“Are you okay?” she says lying me down.

“No...I...I’m falling…” I say panicked.

“Its okay. Calm down. Take a deep breath. You are gonna be fine..” I feel a needle cutting through my skin. And its black all over again.

..........

You guys agree Arnav is self centered? 

Apr 10

Elitists Chapter 47 (B) "Perfect Husband" is up (By Farakhan) (Thanked: 34 times)

Chapter#47 <B> 




                                                            "Perfect Husband"



Song for this chapter: Sweet Creature~Harry Styles.




I don’t know how long I slept but when I wake up, it’s dark everywhere and he is sitting right beside my bed on a chair, wide awake. He stares at me biting his lip looking conflicted.

“What's wrong?” I ask frowning.

“Nothing…”

“Don’t lie!” I say annoyed. 

For a minute, he doesn’t speak instead holds my hand and gazes at me sadly. I sigh.

“You okay?” I ask again staring at his pretty handsome face in the limited moonlight coming through window.

“Yeah...I just...I thought I would never see you again…”

“Isn’t that good?” I demand sharply.

“No….” he shook his head, “I...I Love...You..” I laugh.

“Are you kidding me? Last time I checked you married me for your ****ing sister!”

“I lied! and you know tthat!” I can’t see through him in the dark. I wish I could.

“I can’t even tell what is lie and truth anymore.” I say tiredly looking at the white ceiling.

“I Love You,” he stresses, “And I’ve never lied about it!”

“Arnav, what do you want?” I say not looking at him.

“For us to talk…”

“There is nothing to talk about.” I say taking a deep breath.

“All the time, I misunderstood you. Thought you were evil, selfish and hungry for revenge. I was wrong. It was I, who was weak. In this relationship, I ****ed up real bad. And...And...I...I still dunno how to not screw up but….I need you…like oxygen.” He confesses and I know it took all of his courage to do that.

“NO you don’t.” 

“I do.”

“You always come to me when you’re miserable and alone. But you never held me when I needed you. You broke me like all the fake promises you made and broke. How about all the lonely night? Didn’t you need me then…?” I spite angrily.

“I did. I denied your love. Pretended to hate you. Pretended that I didn’t care but Khushi all I did was think about you. Every single moment, you were there in my thoughts. Always. And I needed you like a homeless man needs a home!”

“Then why did you left? That night, you left me with dislocated arm. You abandoned me when I wanted you to stay!”

“You told me..t..to leave!” he says flabbergasted and I sigh.

“You never know what I want, do you?”

“No I don’t. Most of the time I don’t.”

“It’s better we stay away from each other.”

“Nope. Nope. I’m not letting you go!” he says gripping my hand tighter.

“I’m not staying with you!” I scoff.

“Khushi. We need to talk. Like adults.” He says calmly.

“That’s why I came to your office that day.” I remind him

“I’m sorry.” I breathe gazing at his blurred face. He doesn’t apology. Not so easily. Am I really considering forgiving him? Seriously?

“No. you’re not. Your sister will come home crying tomorrow and you’ll repeat the cycle all over again!”

"I won't."

"I doubt it!"

“You hugged him in the market khushi. So intimately!” he cries and it angers me.

“It was a friendly hug. I was congratulating him for becoming a father!” I almost shout at his face indignantly.

“You could’ve told me that!”

“I was about to but you ate my mouth.”

There is thick silence for a long minute. Almost palpable. But not suffocating. He sits there holding my hand thinking God knows what and I lay with my eyes closed hoping deep inside that he’ll speak. Say something that’s worthy enough to save “us”.   

“You know, I just wish, we weren’t this complicated.”

“It’s simple, you make it complicated by adding so-called choices!” I reply instantly feeling annoying. I’m not complicated. He is. He never understands what I’m trying to say. And his weird habit of “choosing between”.

“Like I said, you’re marquise of angels, you don’t do anything wrong!” He scoffs

“What did I do? Tell me! don’t hold back!” I challenge him boldly. 

“You slept with him!”

“You need to get over it!”

“You ignore me!”

“You didn’t come home for 3 months straight!”

“You didn’t wanted me home!” he protests frowning.

“Did I ever say that?” he stays silent. “Stop blaming me for everything. Your ego stops you from loving people not me or your home or zayn.”  

“You hate everything about me! I feel like a fool around you! Shouldn’t I hate you for that?”

“Did I ever say I hate everything about you?”

“Yes!”

“I was angry!”

“So was I!”

“You’re always angry!” I glower. 

“You’re judging me again!” he says nerved.

“I’m not!”

“How about your love. Who do you love khushi? Me or him?”

“My answer is same.” he scoffs at my words.

“No you can’t love two people.” he says unnerved.

“Then I’ll choose and you’ll let me.” I say confidently.

“Choose me then.”

I don't reply for a few minutes.

“I wanna sit up!” he helps me sit comfortably.

“Are you tired...we can...talk later.”

“You look like a cute child worried for his mom.” I smirk and he sits on the bed in front of me.

“I loved her a lot...my mom.”

“Which one.”

“Both.”

“I missed my parents so much. I took pills just to forget them!” I confess staring at the wall facing me. “My dad definitely wouldn’t have liked you!”

“I’m co..ool...Khushi what do you mean by that?” he asks taken aback.

“You’re not perfect husband. He wanted a perfect husband for me.”

“I’ll...I’ll become perfect husband for you.”

“60 nights ago, we made love. You loved me and now...now I almost died.” I say feeling a little astounded at my present state.

“I”ll make love to you always. Please khushi...look I know I’m pathetic but I can’t help. This *he sighs*..loving you is hard it’s like laboring against myself. You are all is left in me! Instead my reflection in the mirror, I see you. Don’t you think it’s insane?”

“Arnav…” I start but he cuts me off-

“I’ll put the bullet in my head if you died or leave me” I look at him with unknown feelings.

“You tried to kill me just to get Zayn sign those papers! How do you want me to trust you?”

“You kissed Zayn…”

“I didn’t.”

“I saw you both with my own eyes!”

“Senses never lie, do they?”

“But I-”

“-I DIDN’T!” I protest.

“So what was that? He was so close to you!”

“Not a kiss.”

“I trust you…” he says after a moment of silence. 

“Don’t say things just to please me!” I frown.

“Do I look like a people pleaser?” even though it’s dark but I know his perfect eyebrow is raised, ridiculing me.

“Why do you trust me?” I ask dead serious.

“Because in this week, I reflected on my life, my decision, choices and words and actions. I found every single of them silly...except loving you...I’m...I'm not afraid anymore...”

“So what if I dump you and go to Zayn?” I raise my eyebrows.

“I’ll kill myself.”

“No you won’t!” I scowl.

“Try me!” he says coolly.

“You really are mad!” he chuckles. He holds my both hands and moves closer to me, slowly bringing his face nearer to mine.

“Sweet creature!” he caresses my skin under eyes delicately and kisses my cheeks, his breath hot. “You bring me home.” He kisses the tip of my nose, “Please forgive me!”

I look in his warm brown eyes, his breaths mingling with mine and place my lips on his and we kiss for a few seconds, softly, almost delicately. I break away and he touches his lips with his fingers.

“I’m not dreaming, am I?” I roll my eyes amused.

“I wanna sleep.” I says feeling exhausted. “Can I meet zayn?” I ask as he helps me settle for sleep.

“Why? I mean..of course...why not…?”

“I love you!” I whisper and he moves his face closer to mine, “I Love You more.” I smile and fall asleep. Dreaming of my sister making kheer and jalebis for me and scolding me for not taking care of myself enough.





.....



Good Night! My papa is coming home tomorrow. He is in Dubai right now. Pray for his safe flight!


just 3 more chapters! 

Do you guys notice how medicines for mental illness suck a big deal? My best friend had to suffer from depression after her father's death and the medicines won't let her in peace. she was always sleeping or restless and moody!

Apr 27

Elitists Chapter 48 "Peace" is up (By Farakhan) (Thanked: 41 times)

Chapter#48 (Eleven years later) 









“It’s the end..”

"Zayn.." my voice muffled under the thick layers of all the emotions I have been hiding, showing and ignoring.

"Its over..khushi." he holds my hands and I sob.

"Don't leave, please! Stay!"

"If I stay here, we'll rip each other apart. Going away means I will have a life...don't you want that for me?" I sigh wiping my tears with the back of my hand.

"Yes..." my lips quiver as I recite my approval.

"We're gonna be fine." I close my eyes feeling his lips on my forehead.

"I'm gonna miss you...a lot."

"Me too baby. Me too." He embraces me tightly.

"Then don't go!" I wanna scream this but I don't. I can't be so selfish as to stop him just because I miss him. He deserves much more than I or anyone here can offer him.

"Promise me, you'll take care of yourself?" I say breaking the hug and he nods.

"You'll call me whenever you need me, promise?" He offers his hand for a promise and I hold it tightly.

"I promise!"

"And you'll be a nice mom, I'm sure of it."

"Zayn...I don't understand?" I frown. "Am I...am I preg-?"

"No. You'll be with Ali. Won't you love him like a mom Khushi?"

"But why?" I say flabbergasted.

"Lavanya is dying." I gasp, "Wh-at?" I stammer.

"Yeah...she has **** cancer." I sit speechless. "Since she is the reason why you can't be a mom, we decided to give this baby to you. You'll be a better mom anyway."

"You both decided or she?" I ask a little mad at his insensitivity towards the unborn.

“She. And I don’t find anything wrong in it…”

“So you just gonna leave your baby?”

“Yeah…”

“Why?”

 “I can’t explain now...I’ve to go…”

"May the force be with you!"  






I’ll never stop having flashbacks of that night in the hospital. When he left a tiny little bundle in my arms. That night was life changing: I had a child in my arms, my child and I lost Zayn. He left. Zayn never looked back after Lavanya’s death. Everyone thought, they were a happy couple but they never smiled at each other. One was guilty and other too weary to even try. Lavanya had this weird cancer which no one knew anything about except Arnav and Zayn. And when she died the doctor blamed it on difficult pregnancy.

Lavanya had two choices: one to save the baby and die, other to terminate the baby and live. She refused to do the later and chose death.

“This child will be the best part of me, Khushi” That’s what she had told me before dying and she was right. Ali is an angel. She was too guilty to die without giving me her child.

I thought it was wrong. But I was selfish too. Zayn could have had more children but I couldn’t. A part of me accepted Ali as my own even before he was born. Even before his father handed him to me fulfilling his mother’s last wish. I could’ve fought Zayn more but I didn’t. I was desperate, I still am.

“Khushi..” I break out of my thoughts hearing Arnav’s voice and compose myself, “You’re here! I’ve been looking for you everywhere!” he hugs me from behind and kisses my neck, “I missed you!” I break the hug and start to take off his tie. “Where were you lost?” He cups my face and I sigh.

“Let’s not talk about it now. Where is Ali?”

“Oh,” he shrugs, “In his room!” I smile.

“Okay as much as I hate Zayn. I think it’s time to bring him back…”

“No...why?”

“Cause, he’s got a son, who wants to meet him. You talk to him, tell me he doesn’t miss him?”

“He does...” I hold his arm and pull him to the sofa with me. “What happened? Why all of a sudden asking about bringing Zayn back?”

“Ali...he wants to see his father.” I hold his hand tight. “I’m fine, khushi. It’s his biological right and I’m not even offended.”

“Tell me what Ali said?”

“He asked me if his father hates him. Even though I wanted to tell him yes but I told him no. I told him, I’ve no Idea why his father left but he misses him and of course that’s why he sends him present on every birthday.”

“You know why he left…”

“It’s not my secret to tell. It’s yours and his...and I think it’s high time, he unveil himself.” I swallow hard.

“Even though I miss him but I can’t tell him to come back.”

“But you’ve to…” I stay silent, “Okay, I know you don’t want to hurt me or him or Ali but Khushi I’m changed. I can bear him. I’m sure he can do the same…and Ali can have an extra father.”

“Call him.” he prods me softly handing me my phone. I stare at it and then look in his direction.  

“The thing is….I...I’ve...I’ve not called him for years...since the day he...he left Ali with me…” He stares at me surprised. “I didn’t want Ali to hate Zayn so I lied…”

“And the gifts...were you...were you send-?”

“No. No. They aren’t from me. It was him…”

“If you remember someone’s birthday, it means they matter...call him...okay...just do it...for Ali.”

This number is 10 years old, who knows if it’s still working. But I call him anyway.

My heartbeat rises and I feel like my heart has swollen twice its size.

“Hello…” It’s him. I close my eyes and breathe. There is silence on the other side. And I know he knows it’s me.

“Hi…” I clear my throat and nod at Arnav who holds and squeezes my hand gently.

“Khushi…” His voice croaks but he composes it, “Are you okay?”

“Yeah…” I breathe again. “Can we talk?”

“Yeah...sure.” he says after a moment.

“Ali…” Arnav nods at me encouraging me to go on, “He wants to see you Zayn…”

“Did he say that?” His voice soft. I missed it so much.

“No. He didn't. Not directly.” .

“What do you want khushi?”

“If you can...Come home. He is turning eleven this week.”

“I can’t.”

“Don’t you miss him?” I say losing my temper.

“Yes...I do. But I can’t come.”

“Give me a reason!” I grit my teeth.

“If I see him, I won’t be able to leave him again…” I’m tongue tied, “...you’ve no idea how hard it is khushi…”

“Please come…” a tear roll down my cheek, “I want you to come even if it means I’ll lose Ali…” the phone slips from my fingers and Arnav hugs me tight. I sob in his chest.

“It’s okay...we’re gonna be fine.” he kisses my head. I hiccup.  

“I can’t lose him…”

“No...you’re not losing him. He’ll always be your son. Our son just with an additional father.” I look at him in daze.

“How are you so fine with this thing? Zayn coming back?”

“Living with you and having a son has changed me. I’ll do anything to make you both happy.” I hug him again sobbing hard, “Beside, I still wanna impress your father and prove myself to be a worthy husband.” I chuckle in between my sobs. Breaking the hug I wipe my tears away and sigh.

“This is why. This why I never called him. I didn’t want to feel anything about him but I still do. Like it was yesterday he left me with Ali.” he side hugs.

“Like Lavanya died just yesterday. Some wounds, khushi, they never close.” I shut my eyes as Lavanya’s dead face flashes in front of my eyes, “You care about him and even though I hate it but I or you can’t change it. Something we can just accept. We’ll have to live with the fact that Ali isn’t our own son after all.”   

“I can’t give you children…”

“No. But you are my home khushi. No one, not even Ali can be my home, khushi.”

With my heart growing with joy, I’m sure my father is proud of me.

....

Comment?

May 5

Guysss... (By Farakhan) (Thanked: 10 times)

I've an exam in 4 hours and I'm nervous as hell! Anyway I won't update maybe until after Ramzan. This is important. my exams and Ramzan. So...nothing is ever predictable with me tho. My mood swings may force me to write but until then no updates! 



Have a good day/night! 


Love you all! 

May 9

Elitists Chapter 49 "Back to you" is up (By Farakhan) (Thanked: 37 times)

Chapter#49 (a)








                                            "Back To You"








“I wished I wouldn’t see you again.” Arnav says as I settle in his brand new Porsche Panamera. I guess he got richer in all these years.

“Neither did I.” I reply looking out of the window as the car comes to life. “You didn’t have to come pick me up, really.” I say a little annoyed. You see I’ve been away for years now and I’m gonna see my son whom I’ve never called in years. So yes, I’m nervous and scared and I wanted to be alone in this misery.

“Why, were you expecting Khushi?” I roll my eyes.

“I knew she wouldn’t come..” I trail off pulling ottoman styled cigarette case out of my jacket pocket.

“Khushi wouldn’t appreciate that.” He comments referring to me smoking Gold Flake.

“Khushi isn’t my wife, is she?”

“In your dreams, yes.” I roll my eyes.

“No, she isn’t. I’m feeler but not that dumb.”

“Why would you leave? You know Ali expected you on every special occasion and I kept on giving him hopes after hopes. I wanted to tell him that you were an asshold but I didn’t. I couldn’t. Even I know nobody deserves to be hated by their own kid.” I stay silent, “Why did you leave? Answer me dammit!”

“You know why I left.” I say tiredly.

“That’s bull****!” I take another drag of my cigarette and throw the rest out of the half-open window.

“You’ve nothing to say?”

“I hate you.” I say and he rolls his eyes angrily.

“I thought we were over this stage!”

“What do you know about me?” I snap back, “You’ve no idea what I’ve been through!” 

“Then tell me about it.” so persistent. How does Khushi bear him? I take a deep breath to calm my nervousness.

“You wanna know? Fine. Your sister and I had this agreement to get divorced after the baby is born. We’ll have mutual custody of the baby, of course. But then she died leaving MY son to you-”

“-but-”

“-Don’t interrupt me!” I almost shout. “What do you think your sister suddenly turned into an angel and gave a piece of herself to your wife? No. No. No. She didn’t give the baby to khushi. She gave it to you! And she wasn’t suffering from cancer. She lied. It was a planned suicide. All the acting in front of Khushi and you, it was all planned. She died a ****.” He flinches at the word ‘****’.

“I don’t trust you. Why would she do that?” his voice laced with disbelief.

“Because she wanted to avenge me.”

“I don’t understand.” Now he is as nervous as me.

“That friend of yours who studied in America, That Sheetal girl.”

“What’s up with her?”

“Lavanya thought I was having an affair with her.” he frowns, “And moreover she wanted me to love her. She became too obsessed with the idea and when I kept on refusing, she became more ecstatic. I bet her love turned to hate.”

“You’re making things up, aren’t you?”

“It hurts right? To know that you’ve been betrayed by your loved ones. It does. Sometimes, it can even kill you!”

“I don’t believe you!”

“I didn’t either. It wasn’t until the night of her death that I found she was lying all along. If it wasn’t for that chip on her phone, I would never find out the truth. And I confronted the doctor. She lied to me so I would love her. I hate her. I always will.” I close my eyes leaning back in softness of the seat and sigh.  

“What chip you talking about?” he asks after a moment of silence.

“It doesn’t matter now, does it?”

“It does.”

I look at his side profile and ask, “How long till we reach RM?”

“Two blocks away.” I nod my head.

“Tell me about chip. It doesn’t make sense. Why would she give her child to khushi?”

“So it would inherit your riches, ASR.”  

“Why didn’t you come back for Ali then? Why did you left him with us?”

“Khushi…” I look in his eyes, “You’re right. In my dreams, she was my wife…” I wet my lips, “But you know...I couldn’t imagine snatching the  baby from khushi. I knew she would be devastated.” The truth is, I imagined I was living in middle ages and I was leaving my family to go and earn money and I can’t contact them because there are no telecommunication. It didn’t work. Supposing never works in case of love. If anything supposing breaks you even more. It did. So I stopped imagining, losing myself in alcohol. Turning my back to everything and everyone. But it didn’t work either. So I decided to confront my emotions and my past but it didn’t work either for confronting meant coming back here which I didn’t want. I wasn’t ready, I told myself. So I kept thinking about life here, about Khushi and my son.        

And, in this car with Arnav, I kept on thinking about Khushi and my son, again.

“Don’t tell anything to khushi.” I say clearing my throat as the car stopped right in front of his extravagant bungalow.

“She deserves to know.” he says getting out of the car.

“You know what she deserves? To be a mother!” he stops walking and turns to me.

“It will change nothing.”

“It’ll.” I stress. He stares at me for a moment and slowly nods his head.

“I hate you!” He mutters.

“And here I thought we were over that phase!” I mimic him playfully.

“God. your son is so much like you!” I hear him and my smile disappears. Nervousness kicks in again as we walk pass the huge swimming pool and enter in huge entrance hallway through big door opened by two men.

“Seriously, how much did you spent on this house?”   

“$10 million. I can sell it in $25 though.” I bite my lip. Okay house is pretty cool but that’s not what I’m thinking about. My mind is digging up old memories and making up dialogues with my imaginary son as its guest of honor.

Wait where the hell is Khushi?

“HP, where is Ali-?”

“-Can I freshen up first?” I break in his dialogue and he gives me a look before asking me to ‘follow’ him. We walk upstairs. “Where is...Khushi?”

“Ask her when you meet her.”

“But-” we are cut off by a cheerful greeting and my heart skips beat. I swallow. My hands shivering like leaves, my heart pounding in my chest like drum and my mouth dried. I think my eyes are welled up for I can’t see straight. I clench my fists and try to smile but I’m rooted on the spot like a tower, motionless and statued.   

“Hi!” I open my mouth to say something but my voice gets stuck somewhere in oesophagus.

“Let the guest rest for a while, whaddya say?” I just stare at his face as he says, “Sure” and I’m ushered toward guest room. I close the door and plop on the chair nearby.

I bit my lip to stop tears leaking from my scared, wide eyes.

I wet my lips and wipe my eyes with the back of my hands. Taking shower seems like a good idea.I nod to myself trying to swallow the reality.  

“Look at my luck, it’s like I’m latched to you, Arnav. I even have to share my son with you!”


‘Just relax. You’ll be fine. You’ve been through worse, it’s just a meeting with your son! Imagine the worst that could happen?’

‘What if he hates me? Can’t imagine anything worse than that!’

“Shut up!” I wash my face and look at my reflection in the mirror. “I’ll be fine. Don’t...just don’t overthink” I tell myself breathing unevenly. I put my clothes on and comb my hairs. I look at my reflection one more time before exiting the bathroom.


“Oh. You’ve freshen up!” wearing ‘Let’s Conquer Mars’ shirt and denim shorts, stands my son looking like a xerox copy of me.

“Yeah...I guess..” I say walking near my bag.

“You didn’t say hello to me.” I throw my clothes in suitcase and close my eyes blindly locking the case. “Don’t cry, silly talk!” I wipe my tears hurriedly and turn to face him.

“Hello buddy!” I say a little awkwardly, smiling or at least trying to smile.

“Out of all the scenarios, I imagined, this one was least expected. I like bubby better! I feel like I’m twenty.” Oh he is an angel. I sit down on the chair near my suitcase.

“You wanted to rest, I know but I thought you would be thirsty so brought you some drinks.” he points toward the trolley filled with different drinks. “I...I didn’t know which one you like..”

“Thank you...Ali.” We stare at each other for a moment or so.

“Are you crying…?”

“No…something must’ve-”

“-Mom said you’re a bad liar.” I don’t say anything. “And she also said, you’re a dork.” he giggles.

“No..I’m not...I’m not a...dork!” I exclaim defensively. Suddenly he becomes serious and walks toward me.

Standing in front of me, he demands, determinedly, the question, I’ve dreaded the most. “Why did you left?” And he doesn’t look like a child, he looks a little man whose everything depended somehow on this question. I can make up a story and lie or just tell him the truth at least a part of it. I decide to stick to the script. Even though I hate lavanya, I can’t turn her son against her, can I?

“I...you see your mother. She was suffering from cancer and she died soon after you were born. She loved your father a lot and you see khushi can’t conceive so she decided Khushi and Arnav need you more than me or her…”

“You needed me, didn’t you?” I feel tears welling up in my eyes. Dammit! I needed him the most. I had this complete future planned with him!

“I did,” He stares at me for minutes. We both contemplating each other.  

“See,” Ali says holding my hand, “It wasn’t that hard, was it?” I nod my head and grip his tiny hand and hug him tightly burying my face in his hairs. He breaks the hug and drags me toward bed. We sit there and he pours me Peach  juice.

“It’s my favourite. Thank you!”

“It’s my favorite too! Dad keeps on telling me, peach are gonna go extinct because of me!” I chuckle.

“Are you happy?” I ask staring at the half filled glass.

“Yes,” he replies, “And you?”

“I dunno.” I say and take big gulp of juice. “You see, I’m happy, but I’m not happy.” He stares at me with his eyes filled with strange longing. “I..I miss you a lot. I don’t come to see you but...but there is never...there is never a day when I don’t think about you. It makes me sad no matter how….no matter how happy I’m or how gratifying an activity is…:”   

“I am the reason of your sadness-”

“-no. You’re an angel Ali. My little angel.” I hug him.

“Then don’t go.”

“I can’t stay.”

“I miss you.”

“Why...I mean you’ve Arnav.”

“Yes, He is great. I love him a lot. A lot. I just...I dunno...I just want you to stay…”  

“Well. truth is, you’ve got a little sister,” his eyes widens, “she is turning 6 this November.”

“Why didn’t you brought her? What’s her name? I always wanted a sister!” I smile at his excitement.  

“Kara, her name. She is with her mother.”

“Your wife?”

“No, we broke up long ago. She takes Kara to her home whenever she has holidays or extra money to spend.” I shrug.

“Oh!” he looks at me hopefully, “Would you bring her next time?”

“She would be thrilled to see you! We both went to buy you  birthday present.” He smiles, smile of a person who has won something big and impossible. “Why don’t you come to her birthday? we’ll shop for her birthday together.”

“Yep. I’ll convince dad. He never says no to me.”


Coming back is everything but bad. I can feel alive again.




May 29

Elitists Chapter 49 (B) "Back to you" is up (By Farakhan) (Thanked: 30 times)

CHAPTER 49 (b)






                                                    "Everything is changed"







Next day, Afternoon.

“I thought I’d never see you again...” He finally says something.

“It’s because you think too much!”

“Yeah like I’ve been rehearsing this conversation from the moment you called and now I’m out of words.” he sips his drink out of nervousness and I swear he never looked this cute!

“Relax” I say sipping my latte.

“When did you start drinking caffeine drinks?”

“When did you start smoking?”

“Arnav told you?”

“I know a smoker when I see one!” I say smartly.

“A lot has changed.”

“I know.”

“No. You don’t.” I look up in his light brown eyes gleaming with anger.

“You don’t either.” I say nonchalantly.

“I think I know.” He nods his head slowly staring intently at one of many tattoos on his hands.

“You don’t.”

Yes. he doesn’t know how scared and nervous I am right now. He is not the only one on the run. I have been for years too. I have been suppressing his memories for years. I’ve been hiding my pain of losing him, anger at everything and most importantly my love of him for years.

Since the day he left, a part of me became numb. I tried to forget him and my life before Arnav but it’s impossible so I decided to bury it somewhere in the back of my mind by taking odd jobs, spending too much time with Ali, doing social works and studying..

“You’ve moved on and I’m happy for you Khushi.”

We look in each other's eyes until the waiter disturbed us, “Would you like some lunch too, Miss Khushi?” I think that’s what he says. I swallow hard and averting my gaze from Zayn to the waiterAkshay, his nameand nod.

“These people seem to know you.” He says changing the direction of our conversation for which I’m thankful. I don’t want to fight him. I wanna tell him how happy I’m to see him again. To hear his voice. To embrace him in my arms. To have his warm gaze upon myself.

“Yeah. They do. I come here often.” I say after a pause, “Alone.”

“The coffee is good.” He says looking everywhere but me and it seems like he is scared of everything that I’m scared of. The waiter brings our food.

“Salad? Seriously?”

“What? I don’t want to become fat!” I say defensively.

“Okay.” He chuckles.  

“Eating chicken! You are destroying the planet!”

“Am I now?” I shook my head.



“Have you moved on, Zayn?” I ask after a while staring at his bearded face

“Yeah. sort of.”

“I have a Phd in Mathematics…” He laughs in disbelief.

“No. You hated math! You were so glad they won’t teach it in college!”

“Khushi math is the only thing on Earth that makes sense, why don’t you like it? You would always say that. I hated it every time. This line. It kind of made me think everything else was senseless. And nobody want that! You don’t want to be told that lifeyour lifeis gonna be OR is senseless.”

“I didn’t mean that-”

“-I know. I know. Math helped me heal…” I say, “It’s weird, I know.”

“No, it’s not.” He continues looking at his plate, “It helped me too.”

“What tattooing?” He laughs.

“Yes. In a way.” He shakes his head softly.

“I teach. In the university I was supposed to study with you! I'm taking care of my old parents and Payal and her son on my own.” he smiles. “Doing math made me understand the world better. Helped me forget you. Helped me become a better mom. You know Ali is so good at math. I’m so proud of him!” I smile.  

“And, I’m proud of you, Khushi.”

We eat in silence.

“Let’s walk. Two blocks. You can walk right?” I say after paying the bill.

“Yep, no prob.” He shrugs.

“You mean no problem.” I roll my eyes.

“So, Tell me about You!” I ask as we start walking.

“About me?” I nod. “I sold everything-”

“-except the house you lived in.”

“Yes except the house, I sold everything.”

Silence. We walk slowly both engrossed in thoughts. He speaks breaking the silence.

“I traveled through Europe and America. I went to Bhutan, China, Japan and lovely Indonesia. I met women, pretty ones. Hookups, I’ve lost counts of them. I took all sort of odd, stupid jobs. I refused to get my graduation degree. The professors called but I didn’t want to come back. I settled in New York City. Only because its noisy and I like noise. And New Yorkers don’t give a **** about your girlfriend dumping you. They hurry past you like wind and its great to be left alone.” he smiles. One of those kind smiles he passed to ease someone in misery.   

I smile back.

“Then? I wanna know everything Zayn.”

“I met a woman in California, we had a romantic affair. It ended with us having a daughter, Kara.”

“That’s nice.” I smile, “Though, I’m a little jealous.”

“We wanted our first child to be a daughter..”

“Yeah I remember.”

“She was nothing like you. We loved doing crazy **** . She taught me swimming. And I taught her painting. It didn’t last. She dumped me with the child. So I came to NYC.”    

“That’s adventurous.”

“Yeah. I settled down. You can’t be homeless with a child, can you? And now I’ve my own tattoo studio, named after Kara.”

“And I’m guessing, you’ve a girlfriend.”

“Yep. She is German. Elsa. She is great.”

“How great?”

“Remember when before I left you told me you wanted me to find someone who’ll accept me for who I am?” I nod, “She does. And I love her. A lot.” I smile in relief. He wasn’t alone after all. “And she is a real hotsy totsy!” He adds and I laugh.

After a while as we RM comes closer, I ask about his daughter, “Kara...Tell me about her.”

And suddenly I see the enthusiastic nerd, I have known for years, talking about his daughter like she is his favorite comic book character except she actually lives and breathes and pisses him off often.

Somehow...everything is changed.


..............



Final update on the way but first I need great feedback. 

so comment and press that thank you button iin the end :) 

Jun 3

Elitists Last Chapter 50 is up (By Farakhan) (Thanked: 20 times)

Chapter#50



“Happy Birthday to you!” I open my eyes groggily. My wife  and eleven year old son stand by the bed blowing candles for me.

“Hey its my birthday!”

“Mommy, can’t I blow candles too?”

“You did that on your birthday, it’s mine!” I tease him hiding my grin. They remember my birthday when I forgot.

“For your information, you forgot your birthday! Me and mom remembered!” Smartass! I roll my eyes.

“I remembered. I was just waiting for surprise!”

“See mommy he is lying!”

“Khushi, I’m not lying! How dare he accuse me of such a heinous crime!”

“Mommy he is blinking too much!”

“No khus-”

“Enough!” Khushi says losing her patience. “You both are father and son, not enemies. Can you, Mr. Arnav Singh Raizada, stop acting like a child? And you,” she turns her attention to Ali, “Don’t act like a grown up man! And yes, you can blow the candles,” I try to protest but she glares at me, “You lied, Mr. Raizada.”    

“This cake is so delicious!” I say stuffing my mouth full.

“Mommy made it!”

“Of course she did!”

“But you’re more delicious!” I whisper in her ear and she rolls her eyes.

“Don’t be ****y in front of the child!”

“Aren’t you sleepy, Ali?” I ask not giving away my irritation. I love Ali, but sometimes, I just wish he would disappear so I can kiss khushi breathlessly.

“No. I wanna eat chocolate pudding!”

“Don’t you have school tomorrow?” I feel khushi’s gaze on me.

“No. Tomorrow is sunday, dad!” He says engrossed in chocolate pudding.

I look at khushi and whisper, “It’s my birthday, I deserve something!”

“Yes, why not?” He says loudly, Want chocolate pudding more? Its all yours!”  

“Thanks,” I grumble.

“Ali, honey, go to bed. Tomorrow is a big day!” that said and he is gone in a flash.

“Why doesn’t he obey me like that?” I say a little jealous..

“If you’ll act like an adult, he’ll!”

“He is the only person, I don’t wanna be serious with.” I say and khushi smiles.   

“You’re adorable.” I smirk.

“Just adorable?”

‘No.” I raise my eyebrow, she smiles and starts walking away, I follow her wiping my mouth with the back of my hand. Sleep gone. Its 1 in the morning.

I kiss her as we enter the room, knocking the door shut with a kick. She breaks away. I look at her calm face.

“What’s up? Are you okay?”

“I’m fine.”She says but I know better than that.

“Khushi-”

“Remember three months ago, Zayn’s girlfriend paid us a surprise visit on Ali’s birthday?”

“What are you trying to say?”

“They both broke up.”

“Oh. its not our business.”

“Yes it is.”

“Khu-”

“Did you tell her to keep Zayn away from me?”

“Khu-”

“-Yes or No?”

“Yes.” I say firmly. “How do you know?”

That night on Ali’s birthday, I called Elsa secretly. I told her to come and join us. Nobody needed to know. She was smart, pretty and clever. She knew Khushi. Of course Zayn told her she was an ‘old friend’.

So we reached an agreement, “I’ll keep Khushi away from your boyfriend,” I offered her my hand, we were making a deal and she shook it, “I’ll keep him away from your wife.” But it was between us.

“She called me.” I stare at her calm and collected posture. She is anger and its not good.

“Khushi look-”

“You don’t trust me.” She says that in a voice so stern that I tremble from inside.

“Khushi, of course I trust you!”

“Then, why?”

I stare at her pretty face for a while. How beautiful she looks. Even after all those years, she is still young and beautiful and so damn smart. And she is my wife, my home. My life. And there is another man who shares this very home and want this very pretty, smart, lovely woman.

“I..I..”

“I need an explanation.”

“Yeah,” I swallow hard, “He loves you khushi, after all these years, he stills look at you like I do. What do I do? I can’t help but feel insecure.”

“But I love you!”

“You love him too,” My frown deepens.  

“It’s different…”

“How different? What would you do if I was in love with another woman?”

“I would fight to keep you with me, no matter what.” she says honestly and I sigh.

“I’m trying. Okay. I’ve been trying for years now. You don’t understand khushi. Its hard. And it gets harder when he is around. I feel like you’re gonna leave any minute. It sucks.”

“I understand. This is why I never call him. This is why I didn’t hug him when he left. It was to show that even though I might still love him but I don’t belong with him. It’s you, not him. And it’ll always be you!” we stare in each others eyes feeling all kind of fuzzy feelings. I move close to her face and kiss her, a long, wild kiss. She likes it that way. I know that. I know her body. And it makes me proud because Zayn would never know her like I do.

“Tomorrow is a big day,” She whispers as we lay tangled and tired.

“Tonight was bigger.”

“Aren’t you ever nervous launching new products and thinking they would fail?”

“Nope. I’m a perfectionist for a reason.” I smile at her. It’s the most anticipated computer watches that AR is launching worldwide. It’s a big event. Everyone from all over the world is gonna be there.

It doesn’t matter. To me, everything ceased to matter the day I met Khushi.

“Reckon my mother is watching us making love?”

No. She was an innocent soul not devilish like you!” I roll my eyes.

“That’s harsh.”

“You probably are the only person who would want their mom to watch him making love!”

“Why not?” She scoffs, “I’m so good at it, after all.” She laughs.

“You’re silly!”

“Just silly?”

“I hate to break it to you but you’re hotter than hell Arnav.” I smirk and she places her lips on mine.

Night is still young, afterall.




/





Somewhere in New York City



“Dad, tell me a story,” 7 year old Kara says cuddling me tightly. This girl loves cuddles. I sigh.

“There was a guy name Ali,”

“Why do you always tell me stories about Ali?” She grumbles.

“He is your brother.”

“Yes. if you bring him here or take me to see him!”

“He’ll come on your birthday.”

“Really?”

“Yep.”

She sits in silence listening to my self made story of a little Ali who after losing his parents finds out, one night, a way to Breach in another earth where he finds his parents alive and mourning his death (due to sandstorm). And seeing him alive, they're delighted. And he lives with them happily ever after.

“why are there no doppelgangers in real life?”

"There might be. We don't know how to breach in other earths."

"I wish you could find Elsa's doppelganger to make you happy!" She sighs.

"I am happy!" I try to cajol her.

"No you're heartbroken daddy. I know, I googled it yesterday." I swallow hard. Elsa. Oh I miss her so much.

 "Well, I'll get over it." My little girl caresses my beard and looks at me with those big blue innocent eyes filled with care and devotion.

"Do you miss her?" I nod not meeting her eyes, afraid I'll cry.

"Why don't you call her?"

"She doesn't want that."

"Why would she leave just like that?" That's what I have been wondering. I've loved her with all of me and showered her with every possible care a boyfriend can offer. But still she left. Just like that.

"I kept on telling her I loved her, she just wouldn't believe."

"Poor baby!" She hugs me, "I'll never leave you daddy!" My heart swells with pride. I hug her tight, closer to my heart. I kiss her head.

"Aww you're wise like your mom!" I comment encouragingly.

"But mommy says I'm like you and its not a good sign!" She frowns and sighs. I chuckle. "Why would she say that?"

"'Cause your mommy thinks I'm not a very good father," I reply as a matter of fact.

"But you're the best daddy in the world!" I kiss her cheeks and she winces at the contact of my beard with her cheeks.

"That's because you're the best daughter in the world!"

She falls asleep in my arms and my mind drift back to Elsa. For more than two years it was all perfect. Then suddenly, she changed like wind.

Maybe that's how humans are, always changing like wind to suit their purposes. And maybe I'm too old fashioned to change like wind in order to fit in.

I always wonder, why, why me? But I never get an answer. But then I look at my daughter and realize, no one is luckier than me. I kiss her forehead gently.

"I love you more than I love anyone, honey."

I think I slept because I dreamed of Elsa and I in Greece, eating lamb chops sitting at an inn in Aghia Anna. And she is laughing and everything is fine again.

....

comment.


Jun 22

Elitists A/N (By Farakhan) (Thanked: 5 times)

Hello everyone! 


Yeah, I know I was supposed to be updating and writing but sorry y'all, Ramzan and Eid got in the way. Anyway, I kinda didn't want to write, I was busy watching Arrow season 5 (which by the way was Awesome!) and then started re-watching Harry Potter and then decided it wasn't enough so I turned to books. I still have last one to finish. 


Back to the topic, I Won't post Epilogue. I know it's injustice, I said I would BUT I really got nothing to write. Okay but that's half-a-lie. I just feel like you guys are gonna hate me for the nasty turn of events that would if I write the epilogue happen for sure. And I don't want to break your fragile hearts. 


This fiction was fun to write. And it sucked at so many places that I can't read (now) without face palming shamefully! But you guys stuck to it till the end! Even though Khushi pissed many of you BUT in her defense, I really loved her. Like love love her. I have a thing for complicated people considering I like villains better than heroes in movies and tv shows (except the Flash!) and I think Khushi was selfish (at times) and it made her seem villainous because we generally view selfishness as anti-hero/evil. I don't.

I think being too selfless is un-cool and eventually turns you into a villain because you've been sacrificing too much for others to have left anything for yourself. She wasn't an angel coz initially she liked Arnav because you know the **** was great. And never regretted sleeping with her ex. But we all have those so-call "evil" doppelgangers living within us suggesting hedonistic and mean acts.   


And Arnav isn't a saint; in fact he is far from a saint. He is the most evil protagonist I have written. Don't ask me enlist all his sins. 

All I would say is that people like Arnav get lucky a lot more than normal people which is troubling considering their reputation. 


I deliberately left Lavanya hanging, It's more because she was mentally ill and having anxiety myself, I didn't want to do injustice to her. She was suicidal and it's a big thing. Suicidal people aren't evil. they are just alone, hopeless and at times I hated Zayn for being too much in love with Khushi to see how much Lavanya cared for him and that she was suffering.

No matter how "evil" she was, that's not the fate anyone deserve. 

Guess Lavanya wasn't as lucky as her brother, after all.


And Zayn is a loser. I know you guys think I loved him and blah, blah, blah...but that's not true. I would never appreciate someone like him. He is the kind of person who invest too much in other people and in the end find himselves empty and alone. You are never supposed to be as good as him.  

He left his son. I would never not matter how I loved someone do that! 



You guys are thinking why am I ranting about the characters I created? It's simple: I never created anything, they just came to me when I was sitting doing something I don't even remember. 

And there are so many characters who come and go. I don't always pen down my imagination or put an effort to refine them and that makes me a villain for the writer who lives in the harem within!

   



So....Beautiful Pain won't be updated soon...Or it just depends on when I'll write next. 


Bye! I've got to go and submit my CV to this academy for part-time job. wish me a luck!

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Elitists last part is up!